DomCon 2024

DomCon LA just wrapped up and – as is their tradition – there was a big group shot of all the dommes. Or at least all those who were comfortable appearing on camera. The copy below is shrunk to fit my format, but you can see the original fullsize version by sweet girl julia here.

I’ve featured these shots before (e.g. 2019 here) and I always enjoy them. It reminds me of what a big wide world it is and how many kinky people are out there. Although I spend a lot of time in online kinky spaces (twitter, tumblr, blogs like this, pro-domme sites, etc.) I still tend to see a lot of the same faces and names. It’s only natural – the human brain can only handle so many connections. Seeing a shot like this, where I recognize very few people, is a good reminder of the bigger picture.

Originally posted in this tweet. If you’d like to support the photographer of all these shots over the years then the tweet also has her cashapp info.

The Queen Archetype

The Queen femdom archetype is the fourth and final one defined by Mistress Damiana Chi. It’s probably the one with the biggest gap between it’s depiction online in pro-domme advertising and its actual usage.

Online it’s a fantasy depicted everywhere – the regal and superior domme who is so much better than all you lowly servant types. In a pro-domme sessions it would seem harder to work with. It needs a servant type dynamic, where seems easier in a more organic lifestyle set-up. The mainstream depiction of pro-domme lifestyle – where they lounge around sneering at dutiful minions as they clean their house and peel grapes – rarely seems to work out in reality.

This regal figure is Mistress Luna May. She’s a pro-domme based in Heidelberg, Germany. You can find her professional site here and her twitter feed here.

The Mommy Archetype

Our exploration of femdom archetypes brings us to the third on the list – the mommy domme.

Arguably this is the most ambiguous one. The most obvious characteristics it brings to mind are nurturing, controlling and infantilizing. Someone who knows what’s best for you and won’t let you stray far from that path. However, the modern mommy domme kink has become a much more widespread phenomena than it used to be, with a wide range of play styles. It’s not just about ABDL and bedtime spankings. Now they can also be mean, manipulating, authoritarian, jealous and sexual. I think it’s a case where there’s both an archetype and a powerful taboo roleplay, which can intersect in complicated ways.

I’m not entirely sure where I found this image, but it definitely gave me mommy domme vibes.

The Seductress Archetype

Continuing my series of posts on the Femdom Archetypes, we get to the seductress – the second one listed in Mistress Damiani Chi’s new book.

It’s an archetype as old as history. The famous Sirens of the Odyssey date to around the 8th century BC, but they were no doubt part of a much older storytelling tradition. Likely to the first man who fell for a beautiful woman and lived to regret it.

In modern femdom culture, the kink I associate most closely with the seductress is tease and denial. The lure of sensuality and beauty, hiding the hook of frustration. It therefore makes sense to feature a domme who excels both in seduction and that particular kink – Mistress Iris. She recently tweeted a lovely short video that combines sensual transformation and seduction. It’s well worth a watch. The image below was also shared via her twitter account. It’s a look guaranteed to cause most men – not just Greek sailors – to leap to their doom when called.

You can find more from Mistress Iris via twitter, her patreon and her mindful surrender site.

Finally, I couldn’t do a post mentioning Sirens without linking to Oglaf’s take on them – see here and here. Who wouldn’t go for some extra fucky Nymph water?

Archetypes Continued

My last post on Damiana Chi’s book on Dominatrix archetypes got me thinking: What is the full set of archetypes?

The book in question specifies four: Authoritarian, Seductress, Mother and Queen. That does seem a pretty core set, but is anything missing?

At first I thought roles like Teacher or Nurse should be included. After all, they are common characters used in scenes. However, on reflection I think they’re just window dressing on the underlying archetype. A teacher is typically an authoritarian. A nurse can be played as any of the above four archetypes, depending on the dynamic required.

Perhaps better suggestions for additional archetypes would be Princess and Amazon. Where you might think of a Queen as haughty, icy and commanding, a Princess archetype would be manipulative, playful and self-centered. I’m not sure that combination aligns with any of the above four. Similarly, I think of an Amazon archetype as being about physical power, independence and forcefulness, which doesn’t necessarily align with an Authoritarian or Queen.

Whatever the complete set is, the topic at least gives me a chance to feature images of each type. So for the next few posts, I’ll try and find a good examples. This seems like a perfect one for the Authoritarian archetype.

Image source is obviously OWK. Sourced via Assertive Ladies tumblr.

The Dominatrix Archetypes

If you’re a fan of guidebooks and learning more about BDSM then you might enjoy this new release – The Dominatrix Archetypes by Mistress Damiana Chi. I’ve not read it yet myself but I’ve played with Mistress Damiana several times in the past (including just a few weeks ago) and I know her to be a very skilled domme. She’s been a successful pro-domme in LA for many years now, so she’s doubtless got a lot of insight to share.

From her description of the book…

If you are a Woman who is a lifestyle or professional Dominatrix or you want to become one, this book will show you how to REVOLUTIONIZE THE WAY YOU DOMINATE.

If you are a submissive, you will also gain tremendous value from reading this book. You will learn about what you should and deserve to experience with an ethical, conscious Dominatrix.

You can find it on Amazon or via its official site.

Aftermath

One of my favorite candid shots is the post-session one. There’s a lot of inherent ambiguity in them. You know there was some probably some intense and high energy event that just happened, but you don’t know exactly what or how it unfolded. We’re just left guessing from the aftermath.

This is a great example, posted by Maîtresse Blanche. It was taken after ‘a big lesson’. We can only guess at what that might have been, but I’m sure it was appreciated by all those involved.

Maîtresse Blanche is a pro-domme based in France. You can find her professional site here and her Twitter feed here.

Nightstand

This is a lovely example of strict bondage and objectification. The rope hogtie is really well done and I love how he’s perched precariously. It’s an impressive pose to pull off.

The only thing that’d make it absolutely perfect would be a lightbulb in the mouth or a lampshade on the head, as that’d qualify it for my long running lamp series. This shot feels like it’d fit right in there, but lacks the requisite illumination.

I believe the creator of this is TrueTiedTales. The original was posted here and you can more shots from the same scene on their twitter feed.

Back in Tinseltown

I’m in LA for a few days, which has allowed me to sneak in some kinky fun. Unusually, I resisted the urge to book a ton of sessions, but I did renew my acquaintance with the immensely talented Mistress Damiana Chi. We did a lot of bondage with some electrics, needles and general sadism layer on top. I also got to enjoy her fancy Fetters bondage chair in the Chi Temple, which worked really well for tease & denial play.

One interesting but surprising thing was the measurements my Oura ring took during the session. If you’ve not seen one of these wearables, it’s basically an unobtrusive way to measure heart rate, blood oxygen levels, sleep patterns, steps, etc. I assumed it’d show a pretty elevated heart rate throughout. Instead, after starting off at around my usual level, it dropped significantly for the first hour or so of the session! It then gradually climbed after than and peaked pretty high in the last 30 minutes or so when Mistress Damiana really upped the intensity.

That initial drop-off was very counter-intuitive, as I generally feel in a heightened and excited state throughout a session. In fact, it thought I was so relaxed, it asked if it should add a 45 minute nap to my activity log! I’m guessing this was linked to when we were setting the initial bondage up. Mistress Damiana had me on a suspended padded board, held in place with plastic wrap and then several layers of rope on top. That pushed me into subspace pretty quickly which presumably dropped my heart rate. That, combined with me being horizontal and immobile, must have made it think I was napping. There’s little danger of that happening when attractive ladies are attaching nipple clamps!

This image of Mistress Damiana Chiwas sourced via her twitter feed. You can find links to all her primary sites here.

Tease and Denial (Headlines)

If there’s one thing guaranteed to make me insta-click on a link it’s the name Aubrey Plaza next to the word Dominatrix. Unfortunately, the headline from Variety on Coppola’s new movie in which they feature is all tease and no delivery. According to the article she ‘dominates her way through a slew of men’, but that’s all you get. Guess I’ll just have to go see the movie.

Until then we will have to content ourselves with this shot from L’Officiel magazine from 2022. And maybe watching re-runs of the excellent Legion.