The beauty of dominant women
I’m sure everyone seeing that post title had the same thought – this is going to be a standard OTK spanking shot. It turns out there are other ways to employ a hairbrush in a disciplinary capacity. This approach looks like it might be even more painful than a blistered bottom.
I came across this on the Adore Femdom tumblr. There’s no watermark on it but I think it probably originates on the Woman Spanking Men site.
After yesterday’s post on a search for Mr. Right, here’s one on a couple who have already found each other. It comes courtesy of Seattle’s alternative newspaper The Stranger. For Pride week they did a feature on different marriages, and I was happy to see one of them was a femdom marriage. It was interesting to see that dynamic highlighted in in a non-sensational way in a newspaper (albeit an alternative one). Although Sod’s Law would dictate that the entertaining and single Mistress T be 3 hours away from me and this happily married couple just a few minutes down the road. A geographical reversal would have been nice.
I was also a little disappointed to read this in the article…
Elizabeth and Robert did attend some classes at the Center for Sex Positive Culture when they first began exploring BDSM, but they weren’t interested in the trappings of BDSM—the chains, the fetish gear, the parties—nor were they interested in playing with others. Most of the classes seemed to be geared toward locating and negotiating with new partners, not introducing erotic power exchange into an established relationship … So they made it up as they went along.
I’ve never been to classes or got involved with the ‘scene’, so I’ve no idea what is available, but it seems a pity that they couldn’t find useful guidance. As I’ve argued here in the past I think a lot of the so called trappings of BDSM are really just tools to help explore a dynamic. Unfortunately they end up picking up a lot of associations and symbolism that puts people off.
I’ll leave you with a shot from Woman Worship by way of the Tease and Pleasure tumblr. Obviously a posed model shot, but the apron and the wine glass gives it a little touch of domesticity.
Mistress T’s blog is always entertaining to read, but her last couple of posts have been particularly intriguing. The first was a list of qualities she looked for in a potential mate and an invitation for any guys who matched up to email her. This struck me as a post likely to attract both attention and a wide range of responses. As Mistress Eleise de Lacy recently wrote and I’ve posted on in the past, the online dating story for dominant women is not a pretty one. I’m sure that it’s only a small fraction of men that ruin it for the rest of us. However, with 3 billion men in the world, even if only 1% are interested in dominant women, and only 1% of those are idiots, that’s still 300,000 socially challenged males to deal with.
I was fully expecting to see a follow-up post where Mistress T tried to inject a little reality into the responses. Something along the lines of – “200 lbs and 5’5″ does not equal fairly fit. Please stop sending me cock shots. A job as drummer for a Winger cover band does not equally financially secure, particularly if you’re still living in your parent’s basement. I am very sure that the act of fucking you will not suddenly turn me monogamous. And seriously, enough with the cock shots.”
Sure enough, there was a follow-up post, which mentioned the record amount of feedback the original post generated. However,what really amazed me was that some guys thought the criteria she laid out was too strict. I’m slightly surprised that anyone would think that, as it’s a very reasonable list of requirements. I’m even more surprised that some guys would be self-critical enough to understand that they didn’t make the bar. After all doesn’t everyone think they’re smart, witty and great in bed? I mean I know I am, but a lot of other guys can be strangely delusional about stuff like that, poor chaps.
Sadly I live in Seattle, which looks close to Vancouver if you use an atlas and squint, but in reality is a few hours away via the joy of Interstate 5. On the plus side, this post does give me an excuse to feature a few pictures of Mistress T. The first two I picked for her very entertaining expressions. The last because she looks wonderful in it and it’s nice to feature something non-explicit or kinky now and again. You can see a lot more of her at her main site.
Oh, and the post title? Taken from this appropriate scene, in one of my favorite movies. Andie Macdowell is a tough woman to please.
Here’s an interesting piece of dungeon furniture I’ve not seen before. It has a Victorian steampunk feel to it. All heavy metal, hinges and exposed engineering. I like both the look and the utility of it.
The owner of this odd but interesting contraption is the beautiful Mistress Aika, a pro-domme based out of London. You can see more of it and her on her preview page.
The shot below feature Lenny Kravitz and Adriana Lima in a shoot for Vibe magazine. I assume it’s a pretty old image, given that the two of them dated back in early 2000. You can see other photographs from the shoot here.
I’d be interested to know how the shoot unfolded and who had the idea for this image. I suspect it wasn’t Lenny. In the other images there’s clearly a “I’m a cool rock star” thing going on. Only in this one, with his face hidden, does the dynamic change. I also find it odd that this image isn’t exactly the one featured in the published photoshoot. The original image is this one, which has her hair across her face and her hands in a different position. I guess this alternative version was rejected by an editor and then leaked by someone else.
I’m glad this version made it out into the world. I like to think she’s using her left hand to pinch his nose, and really get him to focus on the job at hand.
Beautiful ropework. Wax torture. A vulnerable blindfolded slave. A teasing aggressive domme. What’s not to like?
I came across this shot originally on ‘An addiction to submission’ tumblr. A reverse image search took me to ‘The Purple Pulp‘ site, run by the photographer for this shot. There are some related shots in this gallery, including some more beautiful ropework and some very intense suspension shots.
A few days ago I was waffling about image context, and how it can make a difference in how I respond to an image. Surround an image with other femdom material and I’ll suddenly see D/s elements that weren’t there originally. Well this is the post where I provide a counter-example to that theory.
I first came across the image below on the Alternative Femdom tumblr. Given that source my immediate thought was “Cuckold shot.” There’s a couple making out and a solo male looking unhappy. In femdom porn that combination always equals cuckold. Yet the more I looked at it, the less right that felt. It doesn’t seem to depict jealousy, tension or arousal. The overriding feeling I get is of loneliness and depression. I don’t think it’s his partner with her bra strap showing. I think it’s his roommates, and there lies the pain. If anything it’s thoughtless sadism and self-inflicted masochism.
The painting is called ‘The usual lengthy visit‘ and is by the Vancouver artist Andrew Young. I love his work, and this piece in particular. You can see some of the ‘in progress’ shots for it here, here and here. It’s not femdom, but I think it beautiful captures an experience and emotions many of us have felt at some stage in our lives.
Just a quick post tonight. Work stuff is currently kicking my ass. Before I return to the very un-fun torture of Microsoft Word and Excel, let me leave you with something out of the traditional femdom folder. A nicely red bottom as a result of an energetically applied paddle. A glasses wearing domme is also a nice bonus as far as I’m concerned.
I found this on the Lashkisser tumblr.
Ask most guys what their ‘delicate bits’ are, and I think you’d get a pretty universal answer. The part of the body with the most nerves and greatest potential for pain is always seen as the cock and balls. Yet oddly, in my experience, the most intense sessions I’ve had typically featured other parts of the body. For me, getting a needle through a nipple hurts way more than one through the cock. And heavy corporal has pushed me closer to the edge than any CBT session I’ve had. There’s definitely a powerful psychological element to CBT that makes it a real head trip, but the simpler fatter muscly parts of the body seem easier to punish more severely.
Tonight I did a zippering session with Lydia that had me shaking with adrenalin and screaming in pain. The body part in question? The inside of the leg, particular the lower leg. She had clips everywhere – top of my feet, arms, cock, belly, nipples. You name it, there were some clothespins on a cord attached there. But the killer was the dozens she put along the inside of my legs. She left them on for a long time, long enough to let the blood flow to get constricted and the initial stinging pain to fade to a dull throb. Then she wound her fingers through my hair to hold me still, and ripped them away. I screamed like a housewife in a 50’s sitcom who has just spotted a mouse.
I don’t have a good zippering shot to hand, so instead here’s a shot featuring nice bondage and some inner thigh whipping. As a delicate place to hit, that inner leg is a real killer.
I’ve often observed that the context for an image is very important. Put an image in a fashion magazine and I’ll think of it as a sales pitch for a brand or a designer. My instinct will be to look at the clothes and the model from an intellectual, not emotional, point of view. Advertisements are about selling things, so there’s an inherent degree of mistrust in the interaction. Put the same image in a femdom tumblr stream and it changes how I perceive it quite dramatically. I’ll start looking for and projecting D/s elements. I might spin little stories about the scene in my head. I may think of myself in the scene, or how I’d interact with the model. It’s exactly the same image I’d flip past in a copy of Vogue, but somehow somebody else labeling it as erotic and kinky gives me permission to do the same. It creates a far more emotional reaction.
The two shots below are examples of the kind of images I’m thinking about. I found them both on the Strangely Compelling tumblr. The first was a shot for Numero magazine by Greg Kadel. You can see more images from the shoot here. The second is from a sequence titled Orchidee Noir by the photographer Jose Herrera for Oxxo Magazine.
