Show some link love

One unfortunate trend I spotted when refreshing my blogroll was the number of sites that don’t have a blogroll at all. I’m not sure if that’s a new trend, or an ongoing thing that I’ve just not noticed before. Either way, I’m not a fan.

A blogroll (or a links page) is the original version of Share Our Shit. In many ways, it’s a human version (in a very hand wavy way) of the classic Google PageRank alogrithm. If I like the writing of this blogger, there’s a good chance I’ll also like the stuff they read. Ironically, search engines themselves tend to suck at queries like “Femdom Blog”. I’d say 80% of the blogs I find come via links on other people’s blogs, with the other 20% from social media, comments or email.

So if you’ve got a blog, please put up links to other blogs you like and read. It can be a traditional blogroll or a separate page or whatever. Just show a little love to your fellow bloggers and gives your readers some interesting people to explore.

I’ve no idea what image goes with this kind of post, so here’s a sexy as hell shot of Sophia Loren, taken at her home in Rome in 1955. You’re welcome.

Blogroll Updates and #SOSS

I’ve been doing a very bad job of supporting the #SOSS movement. Some might even go as far as to say the job has been non-existent to date, and those people would not be wrong. Hopefully joining in late will not prevent my hanging with all the cool kids who have been doing it for months now.

For those who have no idea what I’m talking about, SOSS is Share Our Shit Saturday – designed to encourage sharing of sex related writing online.  It started from Girl on the Net and Bacchus at ErosBlog. The underlying issue is the dominance of closed platforms on the internet and their hostility to sex related content. So lets share our shit on the open web and actively encourage people to discover interesting adult content on other sites. Arguably that is what this site has always been about, mostly because I’m lazy and it’s easier to link to talent than to possess it always a leader in social trends.

I decided the first thing I needed to do was update my blogroll and blog page, neither of which had been touched for months. Dead links are gone and I’ve added the following new (to me) blogs…

As far as sharing writing that I’ve enjoyed…

As is my custom, I like to finish a post with some visual loveliness. One of the new blogs – Pain as Pleasure – is written by a kinky man who goes by the handle BibulousOne. He’s written at length about his relationship with Mistress Elita, which gives me a very tenuous excuse for featuring these great images from her professional site.

Mistress Elita is a London based pro-domme. If you’re interested in arranging a session, her site contains all the necessary contact information.

Parallel Universe

Photographer Eli Rezkallah has created an amusing twist on sexist vintage advertising in a series called Parallel Universe. I’m sure a lot of my readers will have encountered his inspiration material in articles like this one. It’s classic clickbait, guaranteed to both amuse, appall and make you marvel how far the world has moved on. He’s taken specific original ads and reshot them with a gender reverse.

I like the idea, but can’t help feeling that there’s a missed opportunity for the companies here. A lot of them are still around. For example, you can still buy Chase & Sanborn coffee, creators of the original ad below. They should reshoot their ad themselves with the gender reverse (or use just Eli’s version) and issue it as a new ad. They could claim it was a both a joke and an implicit acknowledgement of their past mistakes. It’d get loads of publicity  and generate social media controversy – both of which appear to be the primary goals of modern advertising.

Lovely Leather

After the quintessential 1970’s leather domme outfit I posted yesterday, I thought I’d follow it up with an alternative modern take on leather and bondage. This is neither femdom nor my personal kink, but I think it’s a gorgeous costume all the same. The craftmanship and material are beautiful. It almost looks like an abstract sculpture.

This is from the twitter feed of Reflective Desire. More shorts from this scene are available on their website.

The Safeword is ‘Thief!’

This article title really captures the whole story – ‘Woman disguised as dominatrix ties man to his bed and robs him‘. Apparently a German man managed to get both financial domination and bondage packed into a single session. The bondage was consensual, but the 1800 Euro theft less so.

I can’t say I’ve ever been worried about theft, given I always play with well established professionals. However, I do sometimes wonder what would happen if something went wrong after I’ve been wrapped in rope. Often that thought strikes me as the domme is trying to balance in high heels while clambering around the bondage table several feet off the ground. I doubt I’d be much of a Houdini is there was a fall and I had to try and escape to get help for her.  Fortunately, another benefit of playing with experienced dommes is that they’re experts in maneuvering in impractical footwear.

I’m going to go out on a limb here, and predict that the thief in the original article is not an expert rigger. I picture the scene unfolding a little like this vintage bondage shot. She came equipped with rope and it was probably more clothesline than the specialized hemp based stuff.

I’m afraid I don’t know the creator of this image. For anyone who complains about the bondage in porn today, keep in mind that back in 70’s it was hard to find and looked like this when it did show up (so I’m told).

Intense Pegging

I’ve no idea how to embed a tumblr video into a blog post, so I’ll just have to provide this lame link to a hot pegging video and rely on you, my treasured reader, to follow it. There are all sorts of ‘intense’ pegging videos online – with dommes sporting enormous dildos and dominating the hell out of their hapless submissives. This isn’t one of those. For me intensity in pegging comes from the sensuality and the connection formed. Two people deep in an intimate moment. This video might be from a porn shot, but it has a lot more of that sensuality and intimacy than I normally see.

Given my lack of embedding mojo, I needed some other eye candy for this post, so here’s a sexy pegging artwork. It’s not the same vibe as the video, but I like it all the same.

I’m afraid I’ve no idea who the artist for this is.

Update: Thanks to a helpful comment I can now attribute this to the artist Tang. You can find more of their work at this tumblr and their personal site.

Thirst for Knowledge

Much as I appreciate the attractive ladies in the tight dresses, what really makes this image for me is his enthusiastic expression. There is a man with a powerful hunger for some forbidden fruit. If he’d be in the Garden of Eden, that tree would have been stripped bare of apples before God knew what was going on. The serpent wouldn’t even have had time to get his famous sales pitch out. He’d have been less an evil tempter, and more that poor unfortunate creature who got trampled to death as man rushed to grab the fruit of the tree.

According to Wikipedia it’s only in Western Europe that the forbidden fruit is commonly identified as an apple. Other possibilities include grapes, figs and pomegranates. Those actually make more sense to me. I always thought that forbidden fruit should suggest sensuality, temptation and decadence. Apples are perfectly fine as fruit, but they’re also very sensible and boring.  They’re the missionary position with the lights low. Nobody should get kicked out of paradise for that.

This is Ms Renee Trevi with USAFETISH taken from this tweet on her twitter feed.

Should have used more lube

I had all sorts of serious posts to write today. Yet here I am, featuring this image from CNN. I just couldn’t resist it. Great headline? Or the greatest headline?

I can only assume that Senator Collins was wielding something like the weapon below and was sparing on the lube. Poor Donald. It does of course beg the question – what would his safeword be? Typically you’d pick something you’d never say accidentally. So I guess “Sorry” would work pretty well.

Parental Figures

My random thought of the day – originally over a coffee and delicious filled doughnut at my favorite local haunt – was how differently we treat the emotionally loaded words ‘Mommy’ and ‘Daddy’ in kink.

In M/f relationships there are obviously some people who like to roleplay actual father/daughter relationships. That squeaks some people out, but it’s clearly a thing for others. However, a lot of the use of the term ‘Daddy’ seems to be about a more abstract concept of a loving authoritarian figure rather than an actual relative. Typically when someone talks about wanting a Daddy-Dom or a Daddy/Baby relationship they’re using it as a shorthand for a style of relationship rather than claiming an incest kink. Based on my limited and entirely anecdotal observations, I’d say this second more abstract usage is a lot more prevalent than the first.

In F/m interactions I never see this dual use. The more abstract idea doesn’t exist. Any reference to ‘Mommy’ is always about incest roleplay of the naughty son who needs disciplining, educating or restraining. I don’t see dominant women describe themselves as ‘Mommies’ and pro-dommes always list ‘Mommy’ under their roleplay sections rather than their style of play. Mommy Dom never gets used as a label in the same abstract way Daddy Dom does.

In fact I’ve even seen some dommes on twitter describe themselves as Daddies via expressions like “Who’s your Daddy now?” and “Daddy’s Home!” I get why they’d do this, but it seems somewhat odd for a female dominant to draw on a male archetype to emphasize dominance.

I’m afraid I’ve no conclusion to finish with. Nor do I have a value judgement about the current state of affairs. I just thought it was an interesting observation to share. Why the difference between the two? Or am I wrong in my anecdotal observations?

Artwork is by Barbara O’Toole who often seemed to specialize in the older women – young man genre.

Wanted: Friendly Barista with Warm Hands

I’m beginning to think that Gwyneth Paltrow has a fetish for getting people to put odd things into their intimate places. There was the vaginal steaming, then the jade eggs and now it’s coffee enemas. Given the amount she charges for this stuff, there might also be an element of fin-domme going on as well.

While some of us would find daily life tough to face without our regular caffeine fix, it’s probably best to avoid taking it anally. The same goes for that other popular social beverage – alcohol. Not sure what the science says about the scene below though. I’m going to guess doctors would cite a lack of prior data and urge caution.

This is the lovely Mistress Eleise De Lacy in a shot for Femme Fatale Films.