Category: Uncategorized

Self-Improvement

I’m starting on my New Year’s resolutions early this year by ordering myself a tight neoprene hood from Mr S Leather. Admittedly, buying fetish gear sounds more like kinky fun times than self-improvement, but there is method to my madness.

Regular blog readers may be aware that I have an issue with hoods. They stress me the hell out. A fact which I find annoying. Anytime I don’t like something it annoys me. I feel like I’m missing out. Hoods tend to be a big part of heavy bondage and I’d love to be able to incorporate them into my scenes. I totally understand both their aesthetic and sensory value, but so far that knowledge hasn’t helped when it comes to my stress levels.

My brilliant plan for 2020 is therefore to buy one for home and wear it in non-stressful situations. Like while washing up or doing food preparation. If I can train my brain to realize that wearing a hood doesn’t equal instant death by suffocation, then perhaps I can start to use them in scenes. I know of at least a couple of dommes who’d love to get me into their hood collection. In the meantime, if any of my Seattle readers spot a strange hooded man through the windows of a condo building, then rest easy. It’s just your friendly neighborhood femdom blogger trying to improve his kinky life skills. I shall keep you all up to date on how my experiment goes.

This is exactly the kind of fun hood I hope to condition myself to handle. Sadly I don’t have an attribution for it. As ever, if you know the source for this image, then please leave me a comment.

Adjusting His Level

Here’s a somewhat unusual way to do foot worship. I can’t tell if it’s clever or really lazy. I think I’m going to work on the assumption that it’s a hello or goodbye moment, and so he’s paused briefly on the stairs to mark that. Not that he’s been standing halfway up his staircase for the last 20 minutes because he can’t be bothered to kneel down. I certainly can’t imagine that the white wood railing is doing much to improve the kinky mood.

I’m afraid I don’t have an attribution for this image.

Off Leash

This cartoon is mining a common vein for jokes, but it’s a nicely done example of the type. I particularly like how happy the dogs are to see their new 2 legged friend. It looks like a fun time for all. Well apart from the domme that is, who sadly has the requisite scowl in place. That’s probably the least realistic thing about this cartoon. Given how much the average domme love animals, there’s no way she’d not be smiling in this situation.

I might be being particularly dumb, but the signature on this cartoon baffles me.  Can anyone point me at the artist so I can attribute it appropriately?

Updated: Thanks to a helpful comment from Tom I can attribute this to cartoonist Derek Evernden, who created the series Bogart Creek. You can purchase his book and  prints (including of this one) here.

The Joy of Slaves

Dommes have it easy. For most people getting a clean glass is a major challenge involving dishwashers. Not so for your average domme. She just has to pull on some tight, impractical and possibly chilly fetish wear. Then she whistles up her nearest naked slave and stands over him during the cleaning process to ensure he does it properly. A well practiced disdainful look can be helpful at this stage. Possibly he might screw-up on purpose to get a beating. Possibly he might decide halfway through that this isn’t his kind of scene and he wants to re-negotiate it. But, those pitfalls safely dodged, in just a few short hours she’ll have a clean glass. She is then just two slaves and one whipping away from getting that glass of Chardonnay she’s after.

This vintage image come courtesy of a tweet by mrunderheel.

Floaty

A short post tonight. I’m still floating from Savannah Sly sticking a bunch of needles into me and calling me ‘a good boy’. Clothespins, electricity and breathplay may also have been involved. I’ve now got the kind of post session buzz going where I periodically pause whatever I’m doing, reflect on the night and smile to myself.

I’ll also add that while I’ve played with a lot of fancy BDSM furniture over the years, there’s something to be said for a simple padded table with a heated pad on it. It makes for a nice contrast to have one side of the body toasty, warm and comfortable while terribly painful things are happening to the other side. One might as well be comfortable while one is tortured.

This very sexy shot of Savannah is from her twitter feed. If you’d like to see more from her, she also has an OnlyFans you can follow.

Most Overrated Pose

This post was originally going to feature the most overrated item in the BDSM toolbox. After the last couple of posts on underrated equipment, I thought that might be a fun way to finish this series. Unfortunately, after pondering the idea, I’m not sure there are any good candidates for that category. Everything commonly used has its fans. I’m personally not a fan of blindfolds, but I know that a lot of other kinksters love them. Figging would be another personal choice for overrated activities, but I’m not sure something so niche could ever be described as overrated.

Instead let me go with the most overrated BDSM pose, as exemplified by the image below. This kind of shot crops up in fashion shoots all the time. It’s a strong visual and one photographers always reach for when wanting to portray a femdom dynamic. Yet in my opinion, it doesn’t work well in real play. There’s no sense of connection between the domme/sub and, if you want to do objectification, then a footstool or table position is much easier to maintain for a longer period. It’s a pose that’s great for a camera but not much else.

This is the model  Lydia Possner as shot by Markus Brink. More images from the same shoot in this post.

Most Underrated Implement

Yesterday’s post featured floggers, an implement with a high utility in play but comparatively limited representation in BDSM imagery. As soon as I published the post it occurred to me that there was another implement that had a much stronger claim to the most skewed misrepresentation. That would be the humble clothespin. Relatively rare in BDSM porn. A staple of kinky play.

The beauty of clothespins is their versatility. You can attach them to any part of the body. Grab a thin slice of tight skin and they can be very intense. Pick a generous fleshy part and they’re a mild buzz. You can twist them, rub against them and yank them off. Tie them together and you’ve got a zipper. Shave their ends down and you’ve got a much tighter and more focused pinch. Small ones feel different to the big ones, and plastic ones different to the wooden ones. Most fun of all – once you pull them off then rubbing the pinched spot is a whole different sensation. In terms of cost versus benefit, there’s no question that the simple clothespin is the kinky bargain to beat all others.

This image – featuring a simple clothespin zipper – is from the Kink VR site. 

Flogging Fun

It’s a shame flogging doesn’t get more love when it comes to corporal play. Whips have more drama. Canes more visual appeal. Spanking pushes more psychological buttons. Yet in terms of factors like the intensity of sensation delivered, control over the escalation of intensity, the overall skill required and the margins for error, flogging is arguably the best bang for buck in corporal play.

I’d also say that out of all the corporal toys,floggers have the greatest variety in the type of sensations it can create. They can be light or heavy, thuddy or stingy, blunt or sharp. Some can feel like a great massage and others like you were lashed with razors. Whatever the masochistic mood, there’s probably a flogger that’ll suit it.

I’m afraid I don’t have an attribution for this image.

Bad Gifts for Rich Idiots

Gwyneth Paltrow’s Goop brand is notorious for ridiculous and overpriced products. In the past they’ve featured things like vaginal jade eggs and coffee enemas. This year their holiday gift collection features a leather bondage kit that costs an eye watering $1,350 and yet appears to have been designed by someone who has no idea about bondage . That’s $1,350 for just 4 cuffs, 4 straps and a leather paddle. I can’t see any proper padding on the cuffs and the fastening mechanism looks more applicable to a fashionable belt than bondage fun. For that kind of money I’d expect Gwyneth herself to turn up and tie me down.

If you are going to invest in bondage Christmas gifts, then I’d direct your attention to somewhere like Fetters, which carry better quality products at a much lower cost. For example, they feature proper leather cuffs for less than $100 a pair and a wide selection of paddles. Or, for about what Goop are charging for 4 cuffs and a paddle, you could get the bondage chair shown below. That looks like it’d be way more fun for less money. Although probably harder to hide from children and nosy relatives.

Note that I don’t carry sponsored posts, advertising or affiliate links. I make no money from this site. If I’m linking somewhere, it’s because I like them. I do have a soft spot for Fetters, as they’re based in the area I grew up in.

Devilish Look

Something simple for this post. A devilish look from  Mistress Madeline, captured shooting for kink.com.

I post a lot of sessions here that feature fancy bondage equipment or intense sensation play. But frankly, none of that matters if the right dynamic isn’t created. The activities are all in service of that connection. And this is the kind of gleeful expression that I strive for when looking for that. Happy female sadists are my greatest joy in life.