Swapping spit (one-way only)

This is the last of a progressive trio of posts going from gags, to gags with fluids, to just fluids alone.

I always find drool and saliva play interesting from a personal perspective (I enjoy it) and from the contradictory reactions it provokes. I suspect if you showed these images to a non-kinky person (unfortunately I don’t have one handy to test) their reaction would be one of ‘Ugh. Nasty. She’s spitting in his mouth.’ And spitting does indeed have a very negative connotation. Yet a normal part of making out and kissing involves sharing saliva, albeit as a side effect rather the main event. There’s even a slang expression for kissing that explicitly calls it out – swapping spit. So a sloppy kiss is fine, but separate the mouths by a few inches and suddenly the same liquid is yucky. It seems that just introducing a slight suggestion of spitting or drooling dramatically changes the dynamic of the act.

I’d guess that evolution has programmed us with an innate aversion to something spat out by someone else. It suggests a nasty taste or rottenness, something unhealthy. Most guys aren’t going to have an issue making out with a random cute girl they meet in a bar. But have the same cute girl spit in their drink and they’ll be very unhappy, even though there’s really no difference from a hygiene perspective. Of course from a kinky perspective, any activity that invokes a strong emotional reaction is going to be an interesting one play with. Particularly when it centers around issues such as trust, intimacy, disgust and social taboos.

Mistress drooling into slaves mouthMistress drooling into slaves mouth

Straddling the toilet

Yesterdays post on gags and forced consumption put me on the hunt for similar material. Here’s a nice shot featuring a whitehead gag, along with a leash and some painful looking nipple clamps. While he’s no doubt aware of what’s about to happen, the blindfold adds that little element of suspense.

I have to admit that while this looks kind of fun, I personally prefer a more controlled and close-up approach. I think some submissives get off on the idea of being pissed on, where some consumption may also happen. It’s more of a humiliation vibe for them. For others the consumption is the key act, and being liberally sprayed from a distance almost feels like a waste. That’s more a worship approach. I’m definitely in the latter camp. I don’t find being pissed on particularly humiliating, it’s just wet messy fun. Where controlled consumption has a strong D/s dynamic for me.

Of course I could be doing the mistress in this shot a huge disservice. Maybe she has really excellent aim from a standing position.

Mistress straddling gagged manI found this on the Femdom Marriage tumblr site. It’s originally from the Femme Fatale Films site.

Mmmph! Mmmph!

Mistress Troy Orleans has a new blog post up about gags, with a long list of gag types and a nice picture of some of the examples in her collection. The part of her post I particularly liked was this section.

Open mouth gags, such as my preferred variety, the Spider Gag, are my favorite of all gags (piss friendly gags a close, and similar, second) because usually when someone’s gagged, he’s also pretty strictly bound, and that makes me drool and where better for it to go than his mouth? (Not that deposited fluids are at all limited to spit. Or mine.). Another plus for me with the Spider Gag is hearing his teeth click against the metal. It just sounds really uncomfortable and unpleasant there’s something so hot to me about a guy enduring not-sexy pain for my pleasure.
Mistress Troy Orleans

That kind of forced consumption is always a major kink of mine. It manages to be both very personal and objectifying all at the same time. Plus, there’s something equally hot about a woman enjoying my suffering of non-sexy pain. Of course if I’m enjoying it, albeit by proxy, doesn’t that make it sexy pain? I guess that’s the eternal conundrum of the masochist sadist relationship.

When it comes to doling out non-sexy pain my mind immediately went to dental scenarios. Here’s an interesting looking gag, a well stretched tongue and a devilish glint in a dentists eye. Maybe I’m just not trusting enough, but I’m not entirely sure she’s been board certified.

Femdom DentistThe logo on the image is for the serious bondage site, but I believe the domme is Alice and it’s from her BondageLand site.

Happy childhood memories

I love the strange covers of the trashy erotic novels and fiction magazines that appeared from the 1950’s through to the 1970’s. They’re often very lurid and melodramatic, with weird sexual ideas. This one is a particularly good example of their what-the-fuck strangeness, with its newly minted lesbian castratrix. I found this on the femdom artists site, and Her Majestys Plaything also featured some similar covers in a recent post.

The reason for the post title is not because I was almost emasculated by a strangely large lesbian archer as a child. Although that might explain a few things if it were true. In fact, oddly enough, the title is due to my Uncle. He was an ordained Methodist minister by profession, politically active in the local community and highly literate. As you’d expect with that kind of resume, his study was crammed with dense complex books relating to religion, philosophy, sociology and politics. But one enormous bookcase, almost covering an entire wall, was packed with erotic novels. He had all the classics (Delta of Venus, The story of O, Fanny Hill, etc.) but the majority were kinky and explicit works of a more recent vintage. They featured everything from vicious female Nazi doctors through naughty British schoolgirls to seductive French countesses. Sometimes all in the same book.

As you might expect for a horny teenager with kinky tendencies, that bookcase was my holy grail. I planned my visits to his house like an Oceans 11 style heist caper. How could I sneak into the study, dodge the various family members, acquire a book and escape for some private time, before replacing it undetected? Unfortunately I was less George Clooney and more Groucho Marx when it came to the smooth execution of complex plans, and usually ended up being forced to ‘borrow’ one of his conventional books as cover. It’s hard pretty hard to jerk off to the life and works of Catholic philosopher Thomas Aquinas unless you’re a real sicko. Finally, one happy summer, we traded houses with his family for a few days, and I spent every night sneaking his sleaziest nastiest books back to my room. I think I probably slept five or six hours in total over 4 very onanistic nights.

Naked Archer

Oh for a smidgen of artistic talent

Courtesy of Bondage Blog I came across the blog of bondage and spanking model Ariel Anderssen. The original post that caught my attention was Ariel responding to a fairly unpleasant comment that conflated BDSM with abuse and accused her of all sorts of stupid things. We’ve probably all seen these types of accusations and rants before, but I think it’s good to be reminded now and again of some of the views that are floating around outside the kink positive blogs community. She does a great job of pulling the comments apart and I think it’s good that she took the time to do so.

However, that wasn’t the primary trigger for this particular post. The thing that really sparked my interest was this post on the practicalities of booking a fetish model, and in particular her charging structure.

My rates are £50 per hour, £300 per day (based on 7-8 hours) or £1000 per week.
Ariel Anderssen

(paltego : That’s $80/$480/$1600 for US-centric readers)

Now maybe my value system is a little warped, but that seems really cheap to me. Ariel is self-evidently beautiful, has worked for some of the top sites and is involved in running Restrained Elegance. Given her experience she obviously must know what the market rate is for her work. So clearly that’s a representative pricing for hiring one of the top tier fetish models working today.

I don’t want to draw a direct equation between fetish modelling and pro-domme work. The former is all about capturing artistic and erotic photographs. The latter is sexy fun time. Or agonizing/humiliating/messy fun time. Whatever floats your boat. But looking at it just from the perspective of an interesting way to spend some creative kinky time, shooting photographs is a way cheaper hobby. If only I just had a smidgen of artistic talent in my body I’d love the idea of shooting some original content for this blog. Unfortunately, nobody is going to want to look at the kind of out of focus shots of headless models that I’d end up producing.

Picking an image for this post was a little tricky. Most of Ariel’s shots are submissive in nature. However, she’s done some work for the School Mistress Fantasy site, so it gives me an excuse to show something from them. I believe these are two different sequences featuring Miss Walsh, with plenty more similar shots available at their pay site.

Miss Walsh from School Mistress FantasyMiss Walsh from School Mistress Fantasy

The meaning of life

This image made me smile. I don’t find it particularly erotic. It’s a little too surreal and impersonal for that. But it did put me in mind of a Monty Python sketch in the movie the Meaning of Life. It features a man who gets to choose the method of his execution and well, you can see what he picks in this clip. It’s not the funniest sketch in the movie (that would be this musical number), but if you were going to re-shoot it for the male submissive this looks like it’d be a great cast to use.

Squadron of asian girls in leatherI found this on the Bits and Pieces tumblr site.

Fire! Fire! Fire!

(Post title to be read in your best Beavis voice).

I’m feeling a little on edge today as a result of a session I did last Friday with Lady Lydia. The session itself was a fantastic one, which is no surprise when Lydia is involved. However, it did leave me with a rather interesting and/or frustrating (depending on your point of view) short term side effect.

We were playing with heat and burning, with a bunch of surgical staples thrown into the mix just for added fun. For the heat Lydia used several different approaches, including wax candles and sparklers (very pretty), but the bulk of burning was done with an electric soldering iron. By applying the tip to the skin she could pop skin cells, resulting in an audible zap as the cell fluid boiled, and delivering a sharp jolt of pain to me. It created an interesting headspace, as the pain was sharp, but very localized and of short duration. It was quite difficult to zone out to, as it was almost a drip like effect, delivering small blasts of sensation with an irregular periodic timing as she worked across the skin. At the same time being decorated and creatively modified (as I’ve posted about before) is a very intense and emotive experience.

While the session itself was wonderful, the side effect was to leave small scabbing burns all across my chest and genitals. The chest marks are fine, but lines of burns on my cock means that rubbing it vigorously is probably a bad idea. I don’t fancy a scarred dick, so I’m going to have to leave it to heal and remains hands off for a week or two. I realize that for some guys (e.g. Thumper or Tom Allen) a couple of weeks of enforced chastity is fairly trivial, but I’m really not used to it. And the fact I physically could jerk off, but know that I really shouldn’t, makes it additionally frustrating. Don’t be surprised if I start posting pictures of baseball players in an effort to avoid stimulating material.

I do have some shots of the after effects, but I really should emphasize caution before clicking. The chest one is fairly innocuous, but the other two are very explicit and not for the squeamish. If you are the kind of crazy person that for some weird reason doesn’t want to see close-ups of burns on the male genitalia, then please don’t click. I’m very proud of the marks, but I’m sharing them here only for educational value. Those of you that choose to put your genitals into the hands of a creative sadist with a soldering iron will at least now know what’s liable to happen. Here’s the chest shot. This is the cute design Lydia put on my balls. And here’s a shot of the burns to the cock. There are actually 4 distinct lines up the shaft and and a ring around the edge of the glans.

Site Updates

I’ve added two new blogs to the Femdom Art section of the blogroll over on the right. They are Otto’s Femdom Spanking Art and Banjo’s BBS. My thanks to Underling’s recent post for pointing me at them.

On the Femdom Fiction page I’ve added a link to the stories section at askjolene.com. The site doesn’t provide great tools for tracking down femdom stories specifically, but it has got a lot of searchable BDSM and kinky material that can be fun to query into.

Finally I’ve added a number of new tumblr blog links to the Femdom Image page. There are:

The image below was posted both to Femdom Empire and Blackpantyhose. I’m not exactly sure what’s going on but it made me smile. There’s the forceful and slightly angry looking mistress. There’s the cowed and woebegone looking submissives. And then there’s the cocks, in a little world of their own, standing proudly to attention, or at least flying at half-mast. It makes for an amusing contrast. For a man there’s always big brain and little brain, and they’re frequently not on the same page.

Mistress with subdued slaves

A hint of vanilla revisited

This is a follow-up post to this earlier one. I received several lengthy comments, including a response from Mistress Rex which she re-posted to her blog. I started to write a detailed comment as a reply, but decided it’d be easier to simply create a new post. Apologies to those people who weren’t particularly interested in the original discussion to start with. I promise to include an attractive picture at the end by way of compensation.

I want to start with the ‘my way or the highway’ aspect.

Pro Dommes who state from the get-go what is expected in communication – whether it’s as simple as how she is addressed to the more complicated issues of capitalization – it is entirely in her right and reason to do so…
…if it bothers you, find someone else.
Mistress Rex

I think that’s simultaneously true and also irrelevant to the discussion. It’s an argument that taken to its logical extreme would mean never writing about negotiation and interaction with pro-dommes, because the answer can always be “If you don’t like it go elsewhere.” Obviously what I’m writing about here are my personal feelings and expectations. The kind of interaction that I find meaningful and reasonable. I’ve certainly voted with my feet in the past and no doubt will do so again in future. This discussion is about some of the things that might cause me (and other submissives) to do that.

I should also add that I’m not talking about the kind of rules that are necessary for the smooth running of a business. Only calling between certain hours, requiring a reference or deposit, meeting in a neutral space for the first time, etc. These all are sensible operating parameters, and don’t imply anything about the D/s dynamic.

The issue for me is related to the sentiment that coined the expression “I may be a submissive, but I’m not your submissive.” This expression often crops up in the context of social gatherings, where it’s important to emphasize that submission to one dominant does not imply submission to all. For me that same idea can also be applied temporally. Just because I will submit in a session doesn’t automatically imply I should be submissive and deferential outside it.

It is unclear to me if the comments here are in objection to inequality wholesale, or if the men here feel more simply that the demands from these ProDommes were displaced via the lack of personalized attention toward the defining of a unequal power exchange.
Mistress Rex

I’d say my objection is to an assumption of inequality without negotiation or agreement. Refinement and evolution of roles is always going to happen as a relationship (professional or otherwise) develops. But I start from a position of equality. I think it’d be presumptuous of either party to assume otherwise. I might be a submissive, but I’m not her submissive until we agree that. Anyone insisting on lower casing my name and pronouns before they’ve even met me, simply strikes me as insecure. And insisting slaves email multiple times to get a response doesn’t put me into a suitably submissive mindset. It just makes me think that the mistress is crap at running her business.

I’ll also add that there was one comment I saw which, in contrast to Mistress Rex’s thoughtful words, struck me as fairly daft.

When men pay, they feel like they have license to top from the bottom.

Firstly, that’s a ridiculously sweeping generalization. And secondly, it misses the point of this discussion, which is about what goes on outside of negotiated play.

That’s probably enough of my random ramblings. As promised here’s an attractive and entirely unrelated picture to finish the post. It’s not really femdom material, but I saw it on Erotic Haecceities and thought she was adorably cute.

Cute redhead with tatoos

Some times its a discomfort within the ass

I get a lot of random spam posted to the comments on this blog. They are mostly useless rubbish, but occasionally the odd one makes me smile. I was particularly impressed with a recent example that claimed I’d been specially chosen and that I just need to fill in a form to make the link from their junky random page permanent. It takes a special kind of nerve to turn a bogus link from a spam farm into some sort of prize.

However, the one I came across today takes the comedic prize. Bad translations are rife, with many channeling the spirit of 1980’s Japanese electronics manuals, but this one managed to get lucky and almost match my blog content.

Some times its a discomfort within the ass to read what weblog owners wrote but this internet web site is actually user genial !

I’m flattered that they think I’m user genial. While a discomfort within the ass sounds painful, in the right hands it can be kind of fun. For example, I give you the following two images.

PeggingPegging

That looks like my kind of discomfort. The first one I found on Pegtastic tumblr site and the second on the Confession of a sex addict tumblr site.