m – Page 9 – Femdom Resource

Fancy Steel

I’ve featured beautiful metal chastity devices in the past, mostly from the Steelwerks team. The device below is the first one I’ve encountered from the appropriately named Fancy Steel company. I know very little about the practicality of various chastity devices (Thumper is your man for that), but I do like the aesthetics of this one. With the waist belt it reminds me of the old fashioned medieval designs, but brought beautifully up to do date.

At $1,049 AUD it’s not exactly cheap, but that’s not out of line with similar devices. You can see it from a couple of different angles here and here.

Rope and Cane

While I’m on the subject of caning, here’s an interesting shot featuring said implement. It’s kind of abstract and hot all at the same time. The heavy bondage combined with the cane stripes is pretty sexy. I think I’d enjoy being in that position. At the same time the simple geometric nature of the image, with segments of white flesh against the dark background, create a sense of disconnection from a real human scene. If you stare at it long enough it almost becomes an abstract piece of art.

I’m afraid I haven’t tracked down an original attribution for this. If anyone can help me with that then please let me know via the comments.

Your Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man

I’ve got a big smile on my face tonight and a lot of marks on my torso. I played with Lydia earlier and she did some rather unusual bondage using thin twine. It was the kind of rough scratchy twine you might use for a craft project and she wrapped me up like a leg of lamb for Sunday dinner. It was an unusual sensation. Definitely not the kind of bondage you can relax into. Very pinchy, itchy and grippy. Uncomfortable with every moment, which was very much her plan.

I was tempted to take some photographs, but it wasn’t a particularly flattering look. I’m generally fairly slim, but I was definitely bulging and spilling out in odd ways between the tight thin strands. On the plus side, I was left with some very cool marks when the bondage came off. It was web like, and reminded me of a spiderman outfit, as I had all these dark lines radiating out across my chest and spaced down my arms.

This gentleman has a more traditional spiderman outfit. His bondage is also a little different to mine, but equally entertaining in its way. I’m afraid I’ve no idea where this is from.

Not the brightest bulb

I’m not sure what’s the appeal of objectification as a lamp. I certainly get the hotness of objectification in general. It’s just the lamp part that puzzles me. Isn’t part of being objectified about being a useful object? Footstools, toilets, dildos and even shelves make sense to me, but no matter how sparkling their personality, it’s impossible for someone to literally light up a room.

This isn’t the first time I’ve run across this kink. You can see past examples here and here. I’ve never heard anyone declare themselves a lamp fetishist, or read erotic fiction on intertwined anglepoise, or spotted a saucy looking lampshade in a domme’s toy chest. Yet people are making images of it. Good for them and their kinks, but consider me puzzled.

I found both of these on the Domination on My terms tumblr. The second one is from LeBete on deviant art. I’m afraid I don’t have an attribution for the first.

Love v’s Sex (hot sweaty kinky glorious sex)

The Girl on the Net has an interesting guest post entitled ‘Choosing Love Over Kink.’ You can go read it for yourself, but the title is pretty self-explanatory. It’s written by someone who is clearly deeply kinky but has chosen to settle down with someone who isn’t.

My initial reaction was to think of all those bloggers, forum posters and Savage Love letter writers who are stuck in unsatisfying relationships with exactly this problem. It’s easy to point to examples where sexual incompatibility has destroyed relationships. Yet one has to be careful about observational bias (aka the Streetlight Effect). Unhappy people tend to be loud and vocal. Kinky people who have successfully suppressed their desires for the sake of a specific relationship are typically not going to be posting online about that fact. Perhaps the world is full of sexually incompatible people with great relationships based on other factors.

That said, I am one of life’s natural cynics, and find that unlikely. It’s true that all relationships involve negotiation and nobody gets exactly what they want. Unimportant things can be discarded while important things can be compromised. Unfortunately, sex is an incredibly important thing, and there’s no compromise involved in this story. In fact, if you’re fundamentally sexually mismatched, I’m not sure compromise is even possible. It’s also my observation that points of tension in a relationship don’t become less important over time. They’re the bit of grit that rolls around jamming up the works.

Of course as a single guy who has never been married, perhaps I should keep my observations to myself. I’m not exactly the go-to expert here. While I ponder that depressing thought, I’ll leave you with a scene of domestic bliss. Hopefully this gentleman’s idea of sexual compatibility involved nipple clamps and ironing.

I’m afraid I don’t have an original source for the image. I found it on the Seductive Domme tumblr.

Snowpocalypse

It snowed tonight in Seattle. Not much, just an inch or two. Just enough to freak the entire city out. Public transport stopped. Cars slid though red lights like they were mere suggestions. People treated the streets as if they were one big pedestrianized area. Just the usual way Seattle folk react to a regular and predictable winter event.

I like a wintery atmosphere, but can’t imagine making it part of a scene. My list of hard limits is relatively short, but having seen this image I might have to add ‘making naked snow angels’ onto the end of it. Doing it face down seems particularly evil. Let’s hope he can make an angel quicker than frostbite can set in.

Ripping and zipping

I got to do some zippering tonight with Lydia. There was also some bondage, electrical play and scratching, but as I sit here admiring my marks, it’s the zippering that has left the biggest impression. Either I’m getting wimpier or the clips are getting tighter, because ouch. I think I made some interesting noises during the scene, but absolutely nothing that’s going to win me the stoic masochist of the year award.

In honor of our play, here’s a great action shot of some flying cord and clothespins. This is one of the very few images I’ve seen that capture a zipper coming off. I love that you can still see the skin reacting to it. This is Deviant Kade with Lorelei Lee for Men In Pain. You can see a wide angle shot of Lorelei about to pull the cord right here.

The San Francisco sessions

On my recent visit to the Bay Area I was lucky enough to do a couple of different sessions. One with Mistress Ai-Li and one with Mistress Yuki. They were kind enough to snap a few pictures during the sessions, and I thought I’d share the result here. The usual warning applies – these images are of my scrawny ass. Just for a change, the attractive women in lingerie are the ones behind the camera.

The first session was with Mistress Ai-Li and across the bridge in Oakland. As I mentioned in an earlier post, I planned badly and got a touch too drunk the night before. That meant a session that was slightly scaled back in intensity. Fortunately BDSM isn’t a competitive sport and success isn’t measured by who can go further or faster. We had a very enjoyable couple of hours featuring bondage, mild corporal, and CBT, finishing it all off with some nipple piercing. Mistress Ai-Li came up with a fun arrangement of needles and string that gave her a handy handle to yank. You can see what I mean in this side shot and this downward shot. For a small gauge the needles were pretty painful going in, but pleasantly erotic when gently tugged via the cord.

The second session with Mistress Yuki followed two days after. My scratch marks had faded, but my nipples were still tender to the touch. I’ve discovered over the years that mentioning this kind of fact to a domme acts more of an incentive than a reason for caution, and Mistress Yuki didn’t buck that trend! The session featured some heavier bondage and corporal, along with a lot of clips attached to very delicate places. The ones Mistress Yuki had the most fun with were small butterfly hairclips that looked better suited to a young girl’s bedroom than a BDSM playspace. You can see them in place on my nipples here and around the cock and balls here. They hurt going on. They really hurt coming off. But they were absolute agony when Mistress Yuki say on my lap and slowly moved them with her body. The combination of the pain of the clips, the closeness of her and the over-the-shoulder glance that she gave me as she pushed downwards will be a memory that stays with me for a long time.

The image below is Mistress Yuki in a photoshoot from a few years back. Although that’s not my hand with her, it seemed an appropriate image to pick to finish this post. I love blending intimacy and sensuality with intense sensations in a session. I always want to play with a positive energy and both Mistress Yuki and Mistress Ai-Li are great at doing that. This shot captures an aspect of that kind of play that is often missing in kinky imagery.

We have a winner

Last week I posted about a smallest penis competition in Brooklyn. Well we have a winner, and judging by this interview he’s taking his new found fame in his stride. He also seems to have a pretty positive and sensible view on all the whole experience. Of course, if this cartoon is anything to go by, it’s the second place contestant we should be concerned about.

The old cliche is that it’s not the size that counts, but what you do with it. Judging by this picture it looks like someone decided tying it to a metal pole and big toes was the thing to do with it. I’m not sure that’s exactly what the person who coined the expression had in mind.

I found this on the Mistress Alice in Bondage Land tumblr. I’m afraid I don’t have an original attribution for it.

Picking your orientation

After yesterday’s post, which talked about sexual orientation and BDSM, I did what I should have done right from the start and searched for other posts on the topic. That led me to this excellent one by Clarisse Thorn. I think she covered the complexity of the discussion rather well.

To this point I’ve tended to think of sexual orientation as being specifically about what gender someone is attracted to. Not because I believe that BDSM isn’t an intrinsic part of some peoples identity. Just that the common and accepted usage of sexual orientation is around gender, and I don’t like overloading terms unnecessarily. However, I did find one of the comments in Clarisse’s post particularly interesting. It quotes Charles Moser and lists the factors he believes makes up an orientation…

Lifelong – Difficult to Suppress
Prepubertal Recognition
Interest Despite Aging
Immutable, but Fluid
Emotional Price to Do or Not Do “It”
Lust – Specifically and Especially Sexually Arousing
Effect of Testosterone/Anti-Androgens

One does not have to satisfy all 7, but they distinguish a “lesser” sexual interest from an orientation. It also means that not everyone who does a behavior (even repetitively) has an orientation. Also, an orientation can satisfy less than 7, but it is hard for me to imagine someone who satisfies all 7 not having an orientation.

I’m not quite sure what he means by the one on Testosterone, but when it comes to my BDSM interests, I’m batting 100% on all the rest. I think they make for an interesting checklist to consider.

Of course, if the complexity of the human condition is all too much for you, becoming a coffee table is always an option. I’m pretty certain they don’t have a sexual orientation.

I found this on the Undiscovered Limits tumblr.