There’s an interesting post over at the Dumb Domme blog on the subject of ninja submission. Sadly this doesn’t involve dressing up in slinky black outfits and using shuriken to perform CBT. Instead it’s about trying to stealthily sneak submission into a relationship without going through all that pointless and tricky business of actually negotiating it.
I’ll leave the ethics of that approach for D to handle, as she has already done a fine job of it in her original post. Let me instead chime in on the practicalities of it. I’ve seen this approach to D/s mentioned many times before on various blogs and forums. I suspect it probably occurs to a lot of men harboring D/s fantasies in a vanilla relationship. In all those posts and forum conversations, I’ve never yet seen anyone report that it worked. Whatever mad ninja skills they deployed, it always seems to end in frustration. The supposed ‘dominant’ doesn’t notice and the stealthy submissive becomes upset at the lack of feedback. It turns out that a D/s interaction is a dynamic between two (or more) people, not something that can simply be projected by one person.
In her post D goes on to suggest a couple of very advanced relationship techniques that can be used instead – talking and listening. I’ll be the first to admit that they do not guarantee success. They might achieve nothing or even create new problems. However, there are plenty of positive examples out there where they did lead to a more satisfying relationship. Possibly not kinky nirvana, but perhaps a happy middle ground. I’d rather take an approach with a real chance of success over one with very little.
Of course I’ve no experience of trying the ninja approach myself, so feel free to tell me I’m wrong in the comments. Or maybe, if you’re contemplating this approach, start doing all the household chores in the nude and see how it works out. Just watch out for grease splatters when you’re cooking.
I found this image on the Domination on My terms tumblr. I’m afraid I don’t have an original source.
