Lose Control

I was happy to notice the Lunar Black tumblr had recently sprung back into life. That is against the typical sequence of events for tumblrs. They typically either grind to an indefinite halt or vanish into thin air without so much as a by-your-leave. There are not a huge number of artwork themed femdom tumblrs, so I’m glad we didn’t lose this one.

The image below is by the artist sadademort (free deviant art login required) and is called ‘Lose Control’. I discovered it via this post on the aforementioned Lunar Black tumblr. I’m not sure that arm bondage is strictly up to code, but I do like the energy and sense of the D/s dynamic that it captures.

Lose Control by sadaemort

How about a kiddie pool and a lama?

I was highly entertained by this short animated film featuring a particularly hapless ‘submissive’. He manages to provide an excellent example of two particularly annoying traits. There’s the excessive use of honorifics and what I like to think of as Meat Loaf syndrome – ‘I’ll do anything for you….but not that‘.

When it comes to honorifics I tend to veer strongly in the other direction, and omit them unless it’s really clear that I shouldn’t. Partly that’s down to playing a lot with Lydia. She’s not big on protocol and formality. I don’t think I’ve ever called her ‘Mistress’ in a scene and that has conditioned me for when I play with other people. It’s also partly because using formal honorifics doesn’t do much for me. I’m happy to address people however they desire, but I don’t get a buzz out of using a formal title. Perhaps in a more structured and personal D/s relationship it’d make more sense, but for casual play I tend to default to first names unless I’m told otherwise.

For online interaction I like the advice in this thread from Mistress Lilyana. Adopt the username that you’d like to be called. And, the logical inverse of that, call people (at least to start with) by whatever username they publish. That makes life simple.

Hotel Room by Robejavascript:;rt Recker

The image is from Mistress Lilyana’s tumblr. My internet sleuthing tells me it’s by the German photographer Robert Recker and is from a sequence simply called Hotel Room.

Oh, and if anyone’s wondering about the post title, you need to listen closely to what the guy in the animated clip is really into.

Werewolf boy

This image is taken from a Korean film called Werewolf Boy. I’ve never seen it but, from what I’ve read, it tells the story of a young woman finding, befriending and taming the boy of the title.

I’m not sure that it’s really a story of female dominance in the conventional sense, but I do like this image. There’s a beautiful sense of stillness and control in it. Their respective positions speak to the idea of knight and queen as well as beast and owner.

Werewolf Boy

Hot. Hot. Hot.

The West coast of America is a touch on the warm side at present. Temperatures in Seattle aren’t as scorching as in the South West, but it’s still plenty hot. It doesn’t help that AC is more of a nice to have than a must have around these parts.

Hot weather like this makes me desire two things. The first is to sit on a shaded patio, drink long tall drinks (a well made Singapore Sling is always a good option), and trade lazy conversation with my friends. The second is slow sticky sweaty sex of the non-kinky variety. That first desire is probably pretty common, but I’m not sure about the second. Most people want to avoid physical exertion in the heat. And it’s unusual for me to crave vanilla sex at all. I like it well enough, it’s just kink always seems to be more of a focus.

I suspect that the root of my desire is down to scent. Somehow in my mind the kind of light sweat and musk that people give us in the heat is associated with sex. That probably comes from growing up in cold damp England and never going to the gym. All my good memories about being sticky and sweaty involve intertwined naked bodies. As sensory associations go, it’s not a bad one to have.

Sweaty

This image of a beautiful sweaty body is by the photographer Andrew Lucas. I found it originally on the Systemat tumblr.

My kind of Goddess

Here’s a third piece of artwork to complete my trilogy of artist themed posts. This is entitled Femdom Goddesses 2 (free deviant art login required) and is by the artist humon.

According to humon’s notes on it, Ishtar was..

…a Babylonian goddess of sex and prostitution, and was know as the concubine of the gods. But though she had many many many lovers she was also quite cruel to them, and the less powerful ones ended up as her slaves or died.

That sounds like my kind of Goddess. The other pair on the left is, according to some Jewish texts, the first man and woman. Lilith apparently wouldn’t do as she was told and tried to rule Adam. Eve was therefore a backup plan for Adam, created with all Lilith’s sass taken out. Obviously the guys (and no doubt it was guys) creating the original version of that story wanted to send a pretty clear message about what they thought correct female behavior was.

Femdom Goddess 2 by humon

In the bedroom

Today’s artwork is a very different style to yesterday’s, but it’s no less striking. It’s entitled ‘In the bedroom‘ and is by the artist zblabla.

I like the ambiguity of the scene. Is this the start of a scene or the end of one? Is she going to leave him there while she sleeps? Is he purely ornamental or a fun toy for her to play with? You also get the impression our uncertainty is shared by the man on the X-frame. Now he’s fastened in place, he’s not quite sure what she’s planning.

In The Bedroom by zblabla

I found this on the Femdom Gallery tumblr.

Post M

This is my 1000th post. I knew it was coming, but I’m still kind of amazed to type that. It has taken exactly 1010 days to get to it. Given that I do actually have a reasonably full non-kinky life featuring work, friends and family (against all the available evidence to the contrary here), I think that’s pretty good going.

I was initially going to make it a retrospective post on the blog itself. I still might write something like that in the next few days, but for today I’ll make it a post that best characterizes my goal here. I’ve always aimed to provide useful links to interesting people, mixed in with some fun and erotic visuals. So here’s an image that I love from the artist and writer Yumine. I only discovered her work in the last day or so, and hopefully it’ll be new to a lot of my readers. She has both a tumblr and a blog called Storyland. Both feature some excellent artwork and writing and are well worth checking out. As her blog introduction says…

If the promise of men bound, abused, and enslaved stirs your senses and whets your appetite, then you have come to the right place.

Sweet Revenge by Yumine Guo

Perspectives on cuckolding

Dan Savage recently published an interesting series of letters on cuckolding. They were all from people who were either involved in it or fantasizing about it. The first featured a woman justifiably frustrated at her husband continually forcing the fantasy into their love life. The second features a man’s perspective on the fantasy. Finally, a series of four letters from women details both their good and bad experiences with it.

It’s not a topic I talk much about on this blog. It strikes me as a very contextual activity that’s hard to address in the abstract. The tease and denial aspect of it seem very hot to me. The potential contrast between their pleasure and my frustration is certainly a button pusher. However, I find it hard to relate to the emotional components, and that seems to be a key part for most cuckold couples.

Purely on the basis of a risk/reward calculation, it does seem to be one of the more dangerous kinky things to dabble in. Most activities can be tried without risking major fallout. Experimenting to see if you both like floggers or rope bondage is unlikely to decimate the landscape of a relationship. Cuckolding is more of a nuclear option. Great if it works, but you’ll be cleaning the mess up for years if it doesn’t.

Cuckolding

The above image is originally from the Merciless Women site. I found it on the Cuckold Collection tumblr.

Happy

It has been a generally happy day for me. First, the Supreme Court struck down DOMA and dismissed the appeal on prop 8. Plus there was the added bonus of watching Scalia rage impotently. Then I got to enjoy a lot of needles and kite twine with Lydia. Finally, basking in a wave of endorphins, I cracked open some good champagne and sat down to write this. Not a bad 24 hours all told.

I sadly don’t have any images of Scalia getting whipped, bound or anally pleasured. That would have made for a great finish to the post. Instead I’ll run with the theme of happiness. This is originally from the Sacred Kink Academy and came to me via the Happy BDSM tumblr.

Happy

I don’t judge

Today’s post continues the amusing video theme. While yesterday’s was funny but a little silly, this one is funny with an edge. It’s called ‘Shit Girls Say to Dominatrices‘ and was created by Miss Ginger Millay. While ostensibly from the point of view of a pro-domme, there are plenty of comments in there that I’m sure lifestyle dommes will have also heard. The line and follow-up about accepting Jesus particularly made me smile.

The video’s creator is a NYC based pro-domme. I’m sure she’s fabulous at many aspect of her job, but I particularly like her librarian look as shown below. I never roleplay in scenes, but if there was ever a gateway scenario, it’d be Miss Millay in the library with an overdue book. Much more fun than Miss Scarlet in the study with the candlestick.

Miss Ginger Millay as a naughty librarian