Femdom Resource – Page 221 – The beauty of dominant women

More tea vicar?

Religious imagery is not unusual in porn. Priests, nuns and martyred saints proliferate. This shouldn’t be too surprising. Given the impact religion can have on young people, combined with it’s screwed up views on sexuality and all the naked tortured bodies, I’m just amazed it’s not more prevalent than it is. Fortunately I grew up with the Church of England, which is currently one of the more low key religions. A vigorous discussion over tea and cake is as fraught as it ever gets. It’s not exactly the Spanish inquisition.

Typically when religion and porn collide there are lots of sexy nuns, buff priests and flirty catholic schoolgirls. You’d never mistake any of the characters for real religious figures. I was therefore particularly entertained by the image below. The vicar looks remarkably realistic and genuinely surprised to stumble across an attractive lady in tight red latex. He reminds me of a local vicar from my youth. Subsequent shots show him losing the collar and getting caned. I’m therefore guessing he’s not a real man of the cloth. I’m just happy he found his niche playing true to life masochistic vicars for Mistress Annabelle.

$Mistress Annabelle and Vicar$

Hope the wind doesn’t change

I am a master of the silly expression. I like to dream that I’m a stoic masochist, looking serious and intense through a scene, groaning only in deep manly ways at really extreme moments. In reality I know I pull all sorts of odd faces and make all manner of strange sounds. I therefore love this shot of someone reacting in a very unforced and natural way. It makes a nice change from the usual images of heavily tortured men with vaguely frowny faces.

The image was shot by Barbara Nitke as part of her Illuminata series.

Super hard fucker

The mention of 50 shades in the article in yesterday’s post prompted a couple of comments taking a well deserved swipe at the infamous Grey trilogy. I’m fully on board with the hate, as I’ve blogged in the past. However, I do think the point made in the article – that it got more people talking about BDSM – is a valid one. I’m not sure that outweighs the harm created by its messed up treatment of sex/consent/relationships/BDSM/etc., but it’s something that can’t be discounted. Hell, even my parents asked me about it, which was a disconcerting conversation on many different levels.

I’ve always enjoyed this parody of it, but for a really brutal takedown you have to turn to Cliff at The Pervocracy. She’s pulling it apart chapter by chapter in a series of cuttingly funny and insightful posts. You can read her progress to date in Chapters 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 and 6. You just have to love an analysis that includes this description of someone who doesn’t make love but instead ‘fucks hard’…

…to me, it sounds like the kind of shit a guy says to cover the fact that he barely knows which end of you has the vagina parts. “Oh yeah, baby, I’m such a super hard fucker. I’m totally going to put my dick in your clitoris and then I’m going to fuck through your cervix into your uterus. It’s the hottest. All of the hundreds of women I’ve fucked have loved it. I fuck so hard.”
Let’s Read Fifty Shades of Grey: Chapter 6!

My only fear is that Cliff will get so depressed by the whole experience that she’ll not finish the series. That would be a great shame.

In honor of super hard fuckers everywhere, I thought I’d share this image. Judging by the grip she has on the hood and her expression, somebody is enjoying a hard fuck up the prostate and through the colon. It’s the hottest.

The image is originally from the Femdom Sessions site. I found it on the Domina Lova tumblr.

50 shades of Clarisse Thorn in furs

This is one of the better articles I’ve recently seen in the mainstream press on kink. It’s not often you see Bitchy Jones referenced outside of a femdom blog. It’s primarily about a current performance of Venus in Furs at the Milwaukee Repertory Theater, but Clarisse Thorn is also interviewed to provide some cultural context. It makes a nice change to see an article writer find someone who actually knows what they’re talking about and then ask them sensible questions. It’s also refreshing for that person not to be a pro-domme, which always seems to be the default interviewee whenever femdom gets mentioned.

The image is taken from a previous production in Washington DC of the play. That’s Christian Conn and Erica Sullivan in the two lead roles, directed by David Muse back in 2011.

Owner and pet

After a modern image and a funny image, here’s a pretty image to finish my trio of artwork posts. I think it’s kind of sweet. Other people go ‘ahhh, how cute’ at kittens and small children. I do it for pictures of leashed guys exchanging tender glances with dominants.

Based on the image’s distinctive style I believe it’s by the artist Kahori. I found it on the Elegant Femdom Art tumblr.

Supergirl to the rescue!

After yesterday’s post featuring some very modern femdom art, I thought it’d be a nice contrast to reach into the past for this post. This particular image is very much of its time and genre – from the artistic style, through the exposition style of speech (clearly it’s important they’re told she’s got super powers) to the cliched green aliens. What particularly made me smile was the look on the aliens’ faces. They don’t look all that upset about the situation. In fact they almost appear to be queuing up. Perhaps their nefarious plot to take over the earth was simply a ploy to get a good spanking from a cute girl in red boots?

I found this on the Lunar Black tumblr.

Virtual reality kink

The Oculus Rift headset is one of the hot stories in the tech world. It’s getting a lot of positive reviews and some heavyweight support. Virtual reality started out as the hot new thing in the 90’s, and quickly became a joke thanks to the limits of display technology. It seems that after almost two decades the hardware is finally catching up with the concept.

Of course, it wouldn’t be an exciting new technology without someone trying to use it for sex, and fortunately this is no exception. Their sales pitch suggests imaging playing Leisure Suit Larry but actually being in the game. Frankly that sounds terrible, but I do think the concept is an interesting one. It’s a step towards the Holodeck and, as Scott Adams rightly observed, that will be society’s last invention.

I’ve a personal interest here, as I worked in a research group on VR in the 90’s. Back then only incredibly desperate teenagers would have been turned on by the low resolution graphics, but today it looks like the visuals are rapidly becoming a solved problem. Haptic techology – meaning touch and tactile feedback – is the next big area. I can imagine that BDSM sex apps have an advantage here. After all, it’s easier to create a painful sensation that it is a pleasurable one. However, I wonder if BDSM also requires a greater degree of connection between participants. After all, a lot of people can enjoy masturbating to images or movies, and not feel any particular connection with the people they’re watching. Yet most masochists in my experience don’t get off on hurting themselves. Pain is only enjoyable in the right context and establishing that context might be trickier when some of the participants don’t actually exist.

The image above is by Tink2001 (sites here and here). I think he was one of the most talented femdom artists working in the rendering world, but sadly seems to have stopped publishing new work. As an image I think it’s a great fit for this particular post for several obvious reasons.

What’s in a name?

I’m always intrigued by the names porn sites choose. There’s such an broad range from the effective through the banal to the terrible.

Some of the femdom names I like includes Cruella (puts me in mind of evil Disney queens), Femme Fatale Films (descriptive and creative), Strapon Dreamer (explicit yet whimsical) and The English Mansion (brings to mind governesses, nannies and haughty ladies in jodhpurs). In the banal group I’d put things like Men In Pain, CBT and Ballbusting, Young Dommes, etc. They do exactly what it says on the tin, but there’s not a lot of imagination involved. Then there’s the ones that just make you go ‘huh?’ For example, Ballbusting Chicks (Chicks? Really?), Mean Dungeon (too anthropomorphic), Men are Slaves (seems kind of broad), Lethal Lipstick (sounds like a bad B movie) and anything involving the word bitches.

The image below is from Brutal Facesitting. Those are not two words that really belong together. And does anyone here look like they’re being brutalized? Give the dictionary definition of ‘savagely violent’ I would say not. I can’t see savagely violent cunnilingus being a winning technique for anyone.

The thrill-clit cult

The title sounds like something from a Russ Meyer movie, but it’s actually from a Gawker article on a practice known as Orgasm Meditation (OM). It’s not femdom at all, but I thought it’d be interesting to my readers. After all, they’re from a community that tends to focus on orgasm frequency, either limiting male ones or promoting female ones. Plus, I can actually tie the whole thing back to BDSM indirectly.

The OM practice is summarized as…

The woman removes the clothing from her lower half, and only from that half. The partner—the stroker, typically a man—remains fully dressed. The lights stay on. Over the course of 15 minutes, timed, the partner rubs the upper left quadrant of the woman’s clitoris, and she surrenders to involuntary sensation.

The ‘interesting’ bit is that partner in this case doesn’t refer to a romantic connection. It could be someone you just met. Someone you’re working with. A friend. It’s sold as type of meditation, a way to bond and a way to feel good about yourself. The driving force behind it is a company called One Taste, which comes off in the article as a cross between a cult, a commune, a therapy provider, a tech start-up and a sex club. Much as I like the idea of more orgasms in the world, I can’t say the article inspired me to get involved with them.

The connection I can make back to BDSM is that they relate the benefits of OM to the release of oxytocin. That’s a hormone that’s often associated with subspace and the high that comes from an intense BDSM scene. Both OM and BDSM are ways to hack the brain to deliver it. A psychiatrist in the article claims that the only things that can match OM for triggering oxytocin release are childbirth or breastfeeding. I wonder if she ever studied bondage, whipping and ball spanking? Probably not.

This image of a couple bonding in their own particular way comes from Mean Dungeon. I found it on the Geek Domme tumblr. It seems to combine two excellent ways to generate oxytocin – pain for him and an orgasm for her.

Inadvisable advice

Today’s post features an advice column and an inquiry about becoming a dominatrix. It’s kind of an odd letter, with what sounds like a sudden jump from BDSM newbie to professional domination, but I’m going to give the writer the benefit of the doubt and assume it’s been heavily edited. I’m feeling less forgiving about the advice which has two particularly bad statements in it.

…you won’t be good at dominating another person unless you know what it feels like to be on the receiving end. Have you ever been a partner’s true submissive, consenting to bondage, gagging, whipping and verbal abuse? …. You will understand why they do it if you’ve experienced the scope of it.

I would have thought it obvious that BDSM isn’t symmetric. Unless a person is wired to be submissive or masochistic they’re not going to get anything from being on the receiving end. If you’re not into pain and corporal play, then getting whipped isn’t going to be instructive, it’s just going to hurt. That’s not to say a top can’t experiment with sensations and try out some toys, but that’s about understanding the physics and biology of the situation. Not being someone’s ‘true submissive’ (whatever the hell that means). Oddly nobody ever tells submissives that they need to try dominating someone before they can really understand how to play.

You’re effectively creating a complete power exchange. You are stripping a human being of their autonomy, dignity and free will — and physically abusing them on top of it.

This comment annoyed me even more than the first. I certainly do not lose my autonomy or free will when I play. I might temporarily cede control and give up some power, but I always the retain the ability to make my own informed decisions. Submitting does not make someone less than human. And while some types of play deliberately mess with dignity, a lot do not. Personally I’m pretty proud of my scenes and how they’re conducted.

What I think the columnist should have said is – go learn from pro-dommes already out there. Read their blogs. Scan their forums. Go to their conferences. See if you can apprentice with one in your area. By all accounts it’s a tricky job with many pitfalls. Better to learn those from someone else than repeat them all yourself.

The image is of Mistress Absolute, a London based pro-domme. According to this article she shares my thoughts on starting out as a submissive.

There’s a school of thought that says you should start out submissive before you become dominant,” the dominatrix says as students begin to arrive. “That if you don’t know what it feels like, how can you do it to someone else? I don’t follow that thought. I don’t have a set of balls, but I torture balls.”