Succeeding through Kink

Does actively engaging in kink make your more successful and creative in life? That’s the premise of this Harper’s Bazaar article. It’s a nice thought, and it’d be great if it were true, but I’m not sure the article entirely sells me on the idea. It reads a little too much like those lifestyle articles based on selective chosen scientific surveys. They’re not necessarily wrong, but they often treat scientific possibilities as probabilities or even certainties.

From a personal perspective, I’d say my data points are mixed. On the one hand kink does make me feel happier, more relaxed and more confident. That potentially could translate into a more productive and constructive paltego in daily life. On the other hand, kink can be a refuge for avoiding facing tough issues. Like a drug it gives me a high and an escape, which isn’t necessarily always in my best interest. It’s tough to judge what the overall large effect is, although I will anecdotally observe that the greatest period of success in my career correlated with when I was most regularly active in kink.

I’ll finish with an image of success. Hers for a productive days shopping and his for not dropping all the boxes (yet).

This image is by Ellen von Unwerth, shot for Vogue Italy and featuring Bianca Balti.

Trust the Pros

I’ve always maintained that there’s no shame in putting yourself in the hands of trained medical professionals if a scene has gone badly wrong. Any nurse or doctor with a few years experience will have seen all manner of crazy things, and yours will just be another nights work for them.

In light of this article, I guess I should also add firefighters to the list of trusted professionals. At least in Germany that is, as they receive training in how to remove cock rings and butt plugs that have become rather too tightly attached. Amazingly you can cut off a cock ring using an angle grinder, as long as the cock in question has been treated with bandages and heat resistant paste. That’d certainly count as edge play, particularly given it’s a no safeword scene.

I’m afraid I don’t have an attribution for this image. Hopefully all these toys were safely removed without a call to the emergency services.

Splashproof

There’s a lot to dislike about this image. It’s got the classic 70’s domme stare, the limp whip holding and the collar that’d be better suited to a submissive. Not to mention the weird crossed swords behind her. Who ever though that fake medieval weapons were a good look for a room?

On the plus side, her boots, gloves and natural beauty do make it work. However, what really sold me on it was the fetishistic apron-like dress. There’s something both disturbing and sexy about that. What’s going to spurt, splash or squirt that she needs protection from? And not just a small amount of protection. That’s a waist to heel cover. She’s ready for things to get seriously messy.

International Sex Worker Day

June 2nd is International Sex Worker Day. In the light of the FOSTA/SESTA bill passed in the US, it takes on even more significance this year. I’m a bit late with this post to encourage people to attend the various marches that have been happening in major cities, but it’s never too late to show your support.

Some of you may be thinking that you’ve never hired a sex worker, so this isn’t your issue. You’d be wrong. Almost all the sexy images and movies on the internet feature sex workers of some sort. All those images that tumblr is packed with and the movies on the various tube sites is created and taken (usually without consent) from sex workers. This blog wouldn’t exist without sex workers. They feature in the majority of the images I post, they’re the sources for a lot of the links I feature and my interactions with them trigger the thoughts I share. They give society so much and in return, they get marginalized, persecuted and prosecuted.

The simplest thing you can do to support sex workers is to purchase their services. If you like porn, then buy it. There’s a ton of independently produced femdom material for sale at places like this or this. If you want something a little more personal, then maybe order a custom clip? A lot of dommes will make them (for example here, here, here and many more). If you’ve ever considered hiring a pro-domme or escort then go for it. Be polite, clean and pay what’s asked and I predict you’ll have a great time. If you can’t meet in person, then consider using something like niteflirt or OnlyFans. Many of the dommes I talk about here use those services (e.g. Domina Yuki, Mistress Tess, Mistress Evilyne, etc.)

Alternatively, if you want to contribute more directly to the broader sex worker community, then you could donate to organizations like SWOP, Lysistrata, Soar Institute and St James. Or, if you want a more general organization to donate to, try the Electronic Frontier Foundation. They seem to have been one of the few privacy and free speech organizations to consistently stand up against SESTA/FOSTA.

The image below is from Mistress Iris. She also put up a couple of very thoughtful and well written instagram posts here and here. Worth checking out and reading. Not to mention its a chance to enjoy how fabulous she looks.

Foot Binding

I find this style of rope sexy as hell when used in bondage. Something about the more natural color gives it a rawer edge. I was initially so caught up by the binding, that I didn’t even notice the domme’s leg jammed into his crotch. There are no fancy outfits or tortuous looking toys involved, but this is a lovely and sexy scene.

This is from a tweet by Elise Graves, who also provided the bondage and the foot to the crotch. The man on the receiving end is Kino Payne and the shot was captured by steelwerks.

Mercy Mistress Update

I originally featured a post on the Mercy Mistress series last year, when Mistress Yin was still in the process of developing it. I’m very happy to report that the pilot episode has been screened recently (to some amazing  groups of people) and there’s now a teaser available online for it. From what I’ve seen it manages to both capture an essence of the truth about BDSM, while also being as sexy as hell. That’s a pretty good combination.

There are a couple of good articles on the series available here and here, along with the teaser here. I’m personally looking forward to finally being able to watch a drama developed by people who deeply and intuitively understand kink, rather than kink being simply thrown in when a writer needs a sexy ratings booster.

For Richer, For Poorer

Is there a fetish for rich women with poor men? If so, I may have it. Images like the one below always give me a little catch in the throat and quiver down the back. It’s kind of the opposite of fin-domme. These women already have so much wealth and power they don’t need to demand it. Instead the make their amusement by toying with whoever crosses their path. Social femme fatales.

This is Sara Sampaio for the Summer 2018 issue of Sorbet Magazine.
Photo by Rowan Papier. Found via the labstrakts tumblr.

Ballet, Fashion and Fairy Tales

A lot of fairy tales have a healthy undercurrent of sex and kink to them. There’s imprisonment, bondage, torture, bestiality, sacrifice and all sorts of inter-generational power games. What’s not to love about that?

The image below comes from a re-telling of Snow White, with costumes by Jean Paul Gautier. The evil queen is dressed much as I always imagined her – ‘with thigh-high black boots, latex and leather strap work.’ This new version of the fairy tale comes from Angelin Preljocaj and is currently playing at the Sydney Opera house. Sadly, while the costumes are great, I don’t think it fulfills my other fantasy about the story, where the evil queen triumphs and corrupts the prince into all sorts of wonderful depravity.

BoundCon

I’m safely back in Seattle, my East Coast adventures at an end. I’ve family staying with me for the next couple of weeks, so posting may be a bit erratic over that period.

While I’m happy to be home, the place I’d really like to be is Munich for BoundCon. My twitter feed is full of fun images featuring great dommes doing crazy bondage stuff. Some worth checking out are Troy Orleans, Elise Graves, AliceInBondageLand and Lady Chiaki. This image is from an Fm bondage show as featured in this Elise Grave’s tweet. You can see more from the same show, featuring more bound men, in another tweet here.

Foot Torture

I’ve already posted about how much I enjoyed my session with Mistress Tess earlier this week. What I neglected to mention was how educational it was. For example, I learnt that you could use a goat to torture someone’s feet. I should hasten to add that this information was imparted verbally, and not through any kind of practical demonstration. While Mistress Tess may have a wonderfully well equipped studio, she definitely does not keep any goats out back ready in case any really kinky perverts show up.

Apparently the torture method involved coating the victims feet in salt and then encouraging a goat to lick it off. Ticklish at first, as the rough tongue rasped away at the skin, it’d become progressively more agonizing. It seems a somewhat complicated way to hurt someone, rather than say just beating them on the feet, but maybe there were some really lazy medieval torturers who wanted to delegate everything to their four footed friends.

Amazingly I even managed to find a femdom themed advertisement featuring goat tickle torture.  I’m not exactly sure what’s going on or why a goat is needed – my French is limited to reading menus – but it’s kind of hot.

When it comes to tickle torture, there’s one particular artist who comes to mind, and that’s Augustine.  I don’t think he has ever featured goats in a drawing, but there have certainly been plenty of tortured feet.

Apologies for the ugly watermark on this image. I’m sure it has been added after the fact. Unfortunately I can’t track down a clean version of the drawing. You can find plenty more of Augustine’s art on his tumblr.