The beauty of dominant women
I rarely like to criticize people online, and particularly not dommes. However, I have to say that Mistress Silver has chosen a pretty confusing name for her pet here. Judging by the cage and dish she obviously owns a dog, yet she has chosen to call it ‘man’. That can surely only lead to problems.
Mistress Evilyne has put up an excellent and very personal post on Whorearchy, the shaming of female desire and what sexual acts are appropriate for a dominant. Hint: It’s whatever they damn well decide. As she concludes the post with…
As long as you are not hurting anybody either physically or mentally, then go ahead and do what you want to do! Be you and rock it! And don’t let anyone shame you or tell you that they are better than you.
It’s a topic I’ve touched on before. The last time, in a post entitled Demarcation, I linked to writing from Domina Victoria Rage and Mistress T that made similar arguments. As I said then, I think the legal issues of sex work to tend to distort not only the topic, but even our ability to discuss it openly. For example, I wouldn’t discuss a pegging session here unless the pro-domme in question was publicly open about offering it on her site. Just penetration alone can be problematic legally, let alone if you throw an orgasm or two into the mix.
Theoretically this is only a problem in the professional realm, but in reality I think it tends to spill across all of femdom. Lacking other strong cultural models, people take cues from porn and pros. So we end up in this fucked up situation where patriarchal laws distort professional femdom, and patriarchal norms suppress other representations of femdom, and ultimately the distorted former being an outsized influence on the latter.
This is Mistress Evilyne enjoying some public humiliation play. She’s a London based pro-domme.
This Paper Magazine article presents some interesting discussions with several different sex workers in various fields. The one that really caught my eye was from Karmenife, who is currently working as a pro-domme. To quote her from the article…
I actually found sex work through an art project that I did. When I was on campus, I was raped my freshman year and I thought it pretty much ruined me. One way that I reclaimed my space for myself is I did an art project where I dress up like a dominatrix and I dommed frat guys in front of the frat house where I was raped. I had never felt so powerful and beautiful, and to feel that in a space where I had been ripped apart was beyond empowering.
I hunted around online and found this article from 2016 describing the art project she mentions.I can’t believe I missed this when it was originally published. It’s kind of an incredibly story, both to reclaim her power via that project and then to channel it into a career. There’s a site for the project itself here, which is where the following image is from.
Karmenife is currently based in NYC and the twitter feed for her professional persona is here.
If you’re looking for some interesting tips on training a submissive, then you might want to browse this twitter thread started by Mistress Eva. I have to admit that most of the suggestions don’t appeal to me personally. Spanking and naps are childhood things I’ll gladly revisit, but I’m eternally happy to be permanently done with punishment, chores and homework. However, if that’s the kind of thing you like mixed into your kinky play, then you should probably check out the thread.
Of course this also gives me the a great opportunity to feature a photograph of the lovely Mistress Eva herself. From her site she offers online training as well as in person sessions.
I found this image on Mistress Eva’s twitter feed.
I’m not normally a fan of using big industrial spaces for kinky shoots. They often seem very artificial and impersonal. I’ll make an exception for this striking shot however. It puts me in mind of British crime and gangster movies from the 70’s and 80’s. Flicks like The Long Good Friday (which had a scene with men suspended upside down in a warehouse) and the original Get Carter (one of my favorite movies of any genre).
In a modern movie, this’d be the scene where the hero is captured and tortured by the crime bosses evil female lieutenant. In the downbeat 70’s, the anti-hero would be working with the lady with the whip, and this’d be the point where the plan starts going sideways and just before everyone ends up dead. Of course no matter what the era, the plot or the identify of the hero, I’m sure my readers would all be rooting for the lady with the whip.
This is Mistress Manouk, a Dutch pro-domme, as shot by Alex Charilaou. I found it via this tweet.
Update: You can also see a very short clip from this shoot here. Thanks to Daria for the pointer.
Well I’m on the topic of professional dommes producing great kinky imagery, let me give a shout out to Mistrix Sade, and in particular this medical themed post. It has some lovely imagery that takes medical play and adds a slightly unsettling undertone of horror and mad science. I think it’s another good example of taking familiar tropes and making them work afresh.
Mistrix Sade is a NYC based pro-domme. Information on scheduling sessions with her can be found here.
I’m generally not a fan of news stories that poke fun at scientific studies. You probably know the sort of article I mean. In between all the lifestyle pieces on how chocolate, red wine or sleep is good or bad for your health, lifespan or sex life, there’ll be a mocking article on how money is being wasted on silly studies. Any scientist today wanting to study finch beaks, hot mud or mold in dirty lab equipment, better be prepared for the tabloids to attack them as out of touch boffins who waste tax payer money.
All that said, let me now mock this study of online dating. It discovered the ground breaking fact that attractive people are attractive. Apparently, people on dating sites tend to try and gets dates with people more attractive than they are. Given that good looking people are used to attract us more ordinary folks to movies, clothes, music and just about every service and product in the known world, it’s hard to see why anyone thought dating would be different. Did they think people be stupid enough to fall for hot models in commercials, but then suddenly get all realistic and pragmatic when it came to their own dating lives?
Other astonishing results included the fact that men tend to be more active about messaging women, and that women get a higher response rate from their messages to men. I assume there next area of study will be if women like being send dick pics or if pornography can lead to masturbation.
I’ll end the post with an image of someone who definitely qualifies as highly attractive, and I’m sure would happily ignore any number of messages from people like myself on a dating site. This is Adreena Angela, a UK based pro-domme and model.
I’ve been decorated before in sessions, but never anything quite like this beautiful shot. It’s by Asha Luna, a Melbourne based domme, using flowers her submissive brought to the session.
Being used as a canvas is not something I ever particularly fantasize about, but it’s always very hot when it happens. The submissive is simultaneously the focus while also being objectified. An essential part of the art but also just a mechanism for the domme to express herself. For that reason I never really request it as a style of play, as it seems too personal to do so. It has to be something triggered by the domme and her creative spark.
Mistress Asha Luna’s professional site is here and her twitter feed here.
Regular readers of this blog will know I’m not a big fan of hoods. I have to make an exception in this case however, because this one is just so fucking hot. There’s something incredibly objectifying and utilitarian about it. I’m not sure I could cope with wearing it in reality, but I do love the idea of it.
This is from Mistress Natsumi’s twitter feed.
It’s possible that I’m a bad son. I’ve always suspected this might be true, but I think my twitter feed just gave my proof.
I was browsing the aforementioned feed and marveling at how many amazing UK dommes there were on it. It got me thinking seriously about planning a trip back to England to play with some of these fabulous people. Then it struck me that I hadn’t been back to England for many years, and what would it say about me if my primary impetus for a visit wasn’t to see my parents, but to indulge in some kinky shenanigans with ladies in leather? A subsequent rationalization suggested that if I got to broaden my kinky horizons and also see my parents, should I be worry about the whys and the wherefores? Isn’t it the end result that matters? So like I said, probably a bad son.
Note, in case anyone thinks I’m a terrible son rather than simply a bad one, I do pay for my parents to visit the US regularly. And so far, despite temptation, I’ve resisted the urge to sneak off to get my ass beat when either of them has been visiting me.
This is Mistress Silver, one of the UK dommes whose tweets prompted my thought process. She based in Bristol – not a million miles from some of my old stomping grounds.