It’s all about the dick

Custom fit condoms are now a thing according to this article in the Old Gray Lady. Rather than the standard length range of 6.7 to 8.3 inches, you can get myONE Perfect Fit condoms in sizes of 4.9 to 9.4 inches, with a similar degree of variation available on width. They’ve obviously thought through the psychological aspects of getting men to report a penis measurement accurately…

The template that men are given to measure themselves does not include inches or centimeters, instead using randomly ordered letters and numbers. One man might be E99, another Z22.

Of course, given the fact that people can fetishize absolutely anything, if these take off, I’m sure that in 10 years time there will be SPH guys requesting roleplay dialog along the lines of…

You’re a dirty little C11, aren’t you? You’re barely filling that thing. More like a E77 as far as I can see, you nasty worm.

The image below doesn’t have any explicit reference to small penis humiliation. Or any humiliation at all, for that matter. Yet I challenge any male reader to look at those smirks and not feel that somewhere somebody is failing to measure up, and just maybe, it’s them. Hell, I’m not into humiliation at all, and I still get a slight frisson from this image.

This is from the Quality Control site.

Fetishizing race

The Refinery29 site has a thought provoking article on the fetishizing of race – specifically in the case of Asian pro-dommes. It’s written by an Asian women who works in that field, and discusses her conflicted feelings about being able to command a premium price for a fetish she finds damaging.

Anyone who has looked for a pro-domme in a major city will almost have certainly encountered this particular fetishization. Emphasizing physical desirability and attractiveness is a common part of a pro-domme website, and those descriptions can obviously span a huge range of body types and domme styles. However, in my experience there’s only one time race gets featured prominently, and that’s for Asian dommes.

Typically I see three different approaches. Some Asian dommes don’t mention it at all. Some use it as a keyword in a few page titles and descriptions, just enough to trigger a search engine match. Some make it the main selling point and repeatedly emphasize the associated cliches – exotic, cold, cruel and beautiful. From a personal perspective, the more I see race emphasized in a site, the less likely I am to book a session. It’s certainly not down to me to say how a pro-domme should conduct or market her business. I just dislike the idea of being thought of as the kind of guy that would be attracted to that type of racial fetishization. Even if the domme seemed like an interesting person to play with, I really don’t want to be perceived as the middle aged, middle class white guy who got pulled in by a racial stereotype.

The two images below are taken from the Fetish Fortress – a NYC house that specializes in Asian dommes and markets themselves as such. They feature Mistresses Jung, Choi, & Ree fooling around and having fun with feet.

FetishFortress
FetishFortress2

Ditching the dungeon

When I was down in LA a few weeks ago I was lucky enough to get to play with Mistress Lucy Khan. We had a couple of great sessions with a nice mix of tormenting, torturing and teasing. She’s a very talented domme and well worth contacting if you’re in the SoCal area.

I particularly enjoyed getting to see her new play space – The Decameron. I’ve long been a critic of the classic dungeon themes that crop up so often in BDSM. I don’t have a medieval fetish and I don’t know many people who do. Why are so many spaces done in cliched black and red? They end up looking like a cross between Hollywood’s idea of a 1920’s brothel and a 1420’s castle dungeon. I like clean modern designs and I’m happy to say that the Decameron has been created along those lines. It has an elegant feel, with white, grey and teal colors, alongside custom made equipment themed to match the space. I was reminded more a boutique hotel (albeit with some seriously kinky furnishing) rather than a horror movie studio set.  You can see some shots of it here.

Setting aside the aesthetic issues, I also feel a space like this is much more welcoming to nervous newcomers. It’s tough enough to confide unusual kinky desires to a stranger, without the added pressure of a weird environment that feels like entering an alien sub-culture. In contrast this looks like a space you might actually enjoy being in and experiencing.

The shot below is of Decameron co-owners Mistress Lucy (left) and Mistress Iris (right), along with Lady Grace Marie (centre) who plays out of the same space. You can read some of their thoughts on their new space here.

Mistress Lucy Khan, Lady Grace Marie and Mistress Iris Ichiya.

Gangs of New York

One look at their footwear tells you these are not people who actually ride motorcycles. Yet I still like this shot. The old school British motorbikes are very stylish, as are the leather outfits. As an image it’s almost a double cliche. It was shot for Vogue by Peter Lindbergh in 1991, and obviously apes the biker iconography of the 50’s. Yet looking at it now, it is also a great example of the kind of supermodel photo shoots that were so common in the 80’s and 90’s.

Wild at heart

The models featured are Naomi Campbell, Karen Mulder and Helena Christensen. The photographer was Peter Lindbergh. You can see more images from the shoot here.

Life Lessons

I always appreciate a day that I end wiser than when I began it. Today for example, I learned that one should never schedule an appointment at a dermatology clinic the day after a BDSM scene. Particularly a scene you began by confidently declaring – “Oh, marks? No problem. Do whatever you want.”

It wasn’t as if I’d forgotten about the following days appointment. There were some minor red patches on my ankle I’d be meaning to get checked out for weeks. I just figured since it was only my ankle, a doffed sock and a rolled trouser leg would do. I figured wrong. A fact that was made obvious the moment the orderly threw me one of those skimpy backless hospital gowns to put on. Apparently my first visit required a proper inspection, no matter what my protestations to the contrary.

In the event I got not one but two doctors carefully scrutinizing me from head to toe. Two attractive, efficient and forceful female doctors in white coats. I did think that when the second one turned up that you really couldn’t have scripted it better. As the basis for a farce, sitcom, drama or adult movie, whatever you preferred, it worked for all.

Amazingly, despite their careful inspection, they didn’t query my bruises at all. I was fully prepared to plead the medical fifth on the cane marks down my back and the obvious clamp marks on my nipples (from these), but the issue never arose. That makes me suspect they’re either very bad doctors who missed the marks entirely, or very good doctors who knew exactly what the marks were. Given that they identified and queried a tiny insect bite on my wrist and a small mole on my shoulder blade, both of which were pretty hard to spot, I’m going to assume the latter. I’ll now endeavor to resist my urge to test the theory by getting even more obviously marked for any return visits.

White Coats

The image comes from the Divine Bitches site. From left to right, that’s Madison Young, Mistress Madeline and Bella Rossi. I found it on the Femdom Style Counsel tumblr.

Uppity Submissives

Here’s a couple of submissives taking charge for once. The text isn’t all that clear, so in case you can’t read it the one of the left is saying “Don’t worry Mistress. We called in sick for you. Today you don’t need to go to work. Instead, we’re gonna have a nice little birthday party.” And the one on the right is saying “That’s right mistress! Now, come on, make a wish!” I’m not entirely sure of the exact backstory, but I’m guessing this is only a temporary rebellion that they may well regret further down the road.

The art comes courtesy of Shiniez from his site on deviant art. You’ll need to register to view anything, which is annoying, but it’s free and well worth it. There are a lot of good artists featured on the deviant art site in general. In this case you can see the original of this image in its original 1600×993 glory, plus a lot of really well drawn F/f and M/f BDSM artwork. Shiniez strikes me as unusual in that he actually tries to develop emotional and nuanced BDSM artwork. This piece is a good example. Note that it’s really big and long, so you may need to right click, select view image and then zoom to see it properly, or see original here. That’s an example from an ongoing series, taken just after a hot play session between the two women. It obviously lacks context when presented alone like this, but it’s also very clearly different to the simple ‘single snapshot of an extreme scene’ that’s so common in BDSM artwork. When was the last time you saw artwork showing a dom/sub couple unwinding and indulging in aftercare?

Happy Birthday to Mistress