Photograph – Page 173 – Femdom Resource

Revisiting the cliché

The peaked cap is a classic look for dominants of both sexes. For female dommes it’s up there with leather corsets, boots and snarling expressions as clichéd elements of the ‘look’.

Personally I was never much of a fan. It struck me as just too stereotypical and ripe for parody. However, having done a session with a domme wearing one, I’m beginning to warm to them. It wasn’t something that I’d requested. I’m not a fetishist and I’m always happy for the dominant to choose and wear whatever she feels like. It even provoked a smile from me when I saw her with it, but in the scene it definitely added something and pushed some of my submissive buttons.

I’d always assumed that the power of the idea came from the military association. Officers wear them, and officers give the orders. There’s definitely an aspect that carries through from that. But I also wonder if there’s something more basic about the design. The horizontal line of the cap helps emphasize the line of the eyes, framing the face and pulling the attention to the wearers gaze. It also hides the softer hair and squares off the head, creating an aggressive profile. It even offers the wearer a degree of control over what they reveal, helping to shield their face is they so desire. I’d always though the military adoption had been an accident of history and BDSM had simply borrowed the psychological aura that came with them. Perhaps there’s actually something more fundamental about the design that makes it work well for both groups.

This is the model Kay Morgan in a photo shot by phoebus-photos. You can see her in a different angle from the same shoot here. I found the above shot on the S.I.N. tumblr.

The anus is unremarkable

In the comments to yesterday’s post I was reminded of the story of Reverend Gary Aldridge by Miss Margo. It’s another story of self-bondage by a man of God, although with a slightly unhappier ending. Rather than handcuffs, the pastor employed a couple of wetsuits, rubberized underwear, a leather belt and a face and head mask. He complemented this with a dildo in the anus and a hog tie plus ligature combination. Self-bondage is a risky activity at the best of times. Coupling it with autoerotic asphyxiation and a diving suit (or two) and you’re looking at the person voted most likely to be found dead in a horribly embarrassing situation.

I’m certainly not someone who’d critique the Reverend on his kink of choice. I just spent an evening wrapped in much leather with an electrified plug up the butt and a metal probe down the urethra. Freaky is fine. Just don’t do it alone. If you’d like to try some bondage and butt play, just hook up with someone like the young lady below. I’m sure she’ll be happy to fill your need. Although you might want to be prepared in case she calls you up the next day and asks if you’ve still got her wristwatch.

For anyone who doesn’t recognize it, the post title is an internet meme. Autopsy reports use that phrase and it has become an in-joke on some forums. Somebody will post a strange sex story and the response will be “Yes, but was the anus unremarkable?”

Do to yourself as you’d have others do to you

I was recently entertained by the story of a Catholic priest who locked himself in handcuffs and had to call 911 to escape them. The linked article even has the audio of the call, complete with the dispatcher asking where he was (the rectory) and did he work there (he admitted he did). The thing I found surprising wasn’t the restraint loving priest, but the slightly incredulous tone of the dispatcher. In a previous life I spent some months working with operators answering emergency calls and, like ER doctors, nothing seemed to really faze them. They’d heard it all before.

Part of me feels a little sorry for the good Father. I’m sure a lot of kinky people experimented with self-bondage when they were young. I know I did, and it was more good luck than judgement that saved me from any similarly embarrassing public situations. On the other hand the priest in question works for Bishop Thomas Paprocki. His various claims to fame include blaming the lawsuits resulting from the Catholic child abuse scandal on the devil, attacking gay marriage as discrimination against Christians and preaching that voting Democrat will send you to hell. Anyone keeping company with a fine ‘Christian’ like that doesn’t get a lot of sympathy from me.

Next time the kinky clergyman feels the urge to restrain himself from sin, he should find himself a Nun to help out. She can take care of the handcuff keys and also any flagellation that might be necessary for such a naughty priest. Perhaps the young lady below would be willing to ensure he repents properly?

You might be surprised to learn that this very authentically costumed ‘nun’ has not actually taken her holy vows. It’s the model Miranda Kerr, as photographed by Greg Kadel for Numéro magazine. I originally stumbled across it on the Kinky Games tumblr.

Site updates

I’ve been doing some housekeeping. Dead links have been trimmed and new links introduced. It’s always a shame to lose a link that I’ve appreciated in the past. Tumblr’s tend to the ephemeral, but seeing a well crafted blog stop or simply disappear makes me sad. Of the recent removals, Femi’s thoughts will be particularly missed.

On a more positive note, I’ve refreshed the blogroll on the right, and added two new blogs to the blog page:

On the image page I’ve added a number of new tumblr links:

Domina Desires (curated by Amy, who also writes Lipstick and Ligature above)
Thoughts of a dork
Badkitty Kat
fortq
MsRoxanne
Pure Beauty
Hoejhael
Hommage to Dominatrixes
My Dominatrix Romance

Hopefully there should be a little something for everyone in that collection. I’ll leave you with an image that featured on at least two of the newly added tumblr’s (Domina Desires and Thoughts of a dork).

The original source for this image is the Brutal Facesitting site.

The root of all evil

Given the number of external links I include in my posts and across the site, I should probably post my policy on monetizing web traffic, affiliate links and advertising. I’d hate people to get the wrong impression of why I link to what I do.

The short answer is that I make no money from anything here. You’ll never see links to commercial sites that benefit me financially. If I link to pro-domme, shopping or porn sites it’s because I think they’re relevant to the post. I’d like to say this comes from a purity of purpose and some sort of blogging ethos. There is a little bit of that but, realistically, if someone offered me one million dollars to post lolcat pictures, right now you’d all be looking at a lot of felines demanding cheeseburgers.

Quite honestly it’s mostly an effort versus reward trade-off. I like the freedom of being able to write about and link to anything, rather than trying to work posts around something that might make me a few bucks. I’ve nothing against sites that do try to make money, but for me this is a labor of love, and I intend to keep it that way.

I do get a fair number of requests for advertising, and some of them are actual readers rather than marketing spam. However, I like the clean look of the site and really don’t want to spoil it with ads. So if you’ve got a porn site you’d like me to send traffic to, then simply share some of your content with me. If it’s interesting and relevant, I’ll feature it and link to you. That’ll get way more clicks than some small ad on the side.

Given the commercial theme of the post, it seems fitting to feature an image using femdom in a commercial context. This is from a shoot for Loewe clothes by Xevi Muntane featured in ponystep magazine. You can see more of the images from the shoot here. I did not get a cut from of any of them.

Kinky Kevin Bacon

Before I get sued, I should start by saying I have no idea if Kevin Bacon is kinky or not. Instead I had in mind the game named after the eponymous actor, where you try and connect actors and actresses via movies to him. What got me started on this was research for yesterday’s post.

The post itself featured The Spirit, in some artwork created by the artist Darwyn Cooke. Looking him up I discovered that he’d created a series of graphic novels based on Donald Westlake’s (aka Richard Stark) Parker series. I’m a big fan of these books. They’re classic hard boiled American fiction. Raw, exciting and blunt. The first novel, called The Hunter, has been turned into two movies. The rather excellent Point Blank with Lee Marvin and the less good but still entertaining Payback with Mel Gibson. And in that second version, Lucy Liu plays a vicious dominatrix, bringing me all the way back around to femdom again. You can see her longest scene in this clip or a compilation of her scenes here.

Admittedly that’s more a circular connection than anything, but it got me wondering, who would be the kinky equivalent of Kevin Bacon? Who would you pick as the ideal center of the kinky scene to connect everyone to? According to wikipedia Kevin Bacon is himself not the ideal person for the most optimal actor graph. The easiest person to connect changes over time as movies are made, and right now it’s Dennis Hopper, which sounds about right. You want someone who worked with a lot of stars, was around a longtime, and did a wide range of material. So who would you pick for that from the BDSM porn or kink community?

Sub drop

After writing yesterday’s post on new year traditions, it struck me that I’d forgotten about the ball drop in New York. It’s a pretty ridiculous ceremony, but it is at least adaptable to a kinky context. Suspension is always fun and gently lowering a bound submissive to mark the dawn of a new year would be a nice twist on the tradition.

Note that you should never do suspension play unless you’ve had suitable training and know exactly what you’re doing. It’s a potentially dangerous form of play. Particularly if you’ve drunk several glasses of champagne to celebrate the new year!

This image comes via Club Dom and was found on the 24-7-Sub tumblr.

That’s a wrap!

Another year in the can. If it wasn’t a great one for you, or if this holiday season hasn’t been all it could be, then I hope a new shiny 2013 will bring you better things. Alternatively, for those readers who had a kick-ass 2012, then I hope the ass kicking continues all the way into the new year. Kink isn’t everything in life but, since it is the focus of this blog, I’ll wish everyone a very kinky 2013!

Some of my recent posts have featured clever ways to pervert Christmas traditions in fun ways. New Year celebrations are a little trickier. Some people do practice a form of masochism by getting drunk and spending the next day in a painful alcohol induced fog, but that’s not exactly an enjoyable pain. Champagne is the traditional drink, which is mostly thanks to clever marketing. So in deference to that, here’s an image of someone creating their own unique blanc de blanc to drink. Personally I’m a fan of drinking champagne (of all types) on any day of the year!

The image is from Club Stiletto. I found it on the Felm Cyber tumblr.

Christmas balls

I wrote last week about the fun I had being turned into a Christmas tree. It turns out that Lydia wasn’t the only domme feeling inspired by the season. Louca Brazzi has written up an entertaining review of a session he did with Mistress Tess that featured a red striped ass getting pinned with some sparkly Christmas balls. Mistress Tess even captured a photograph of his nicely decorated posterior. They say it’s the season of giving. Clearly in this case it gave her a fun session idea and him a very sore bottom!

It’d be a crime to mention the beautiful Mistress Tess and not take the opportunity to feature a photograph. This one shows her with some of her more interesting looking toys.

Mistress Tess is a NYC based pro-domme. You can find information on her interests and scheduling sessions at her site.

Curing my hysteria

Buying Christmas gifts for friends is always tricky. You don’t want to create a problem for them by sticking them with something they don’t like or can’t use. My circle of friends often defaults to wine, which leads to a lot of pointless circulating of bottles between us. Fortunately I have one friend with imagination, and she got me one of my best presents ever – a vintage vibrator.

The device in question can be seen below, with a couple of alternate angles here and here. She actually inherited it from a relative who collected antiques and vintage mechanical/electrical devices. Apparently her partner commented that it looked like it’d be very painful and you’d have to be crazy to allow it anywhere near your private parts. For some odd reason that immediately brought me to her mind, and I therefore had the pleasure of unwrapping it in a busy Seattle restaurant. I’m sure our server at least got a smile out of it.

Anyone surprised that vintage vibrators even exist should check out this article on their history. They were originally developed to ‘cure hysteria’ in women around the end of the nineteenth century. In a nice bit of Victorian double-think, since women weren’t sexual then using a device to induce a ‘hysterical paroxysm’ wasn’t sexual either. It was just a useful medical technique. They were even openly advertised in housekeeping magazines of the time. Here’s an advert I managed to track down for my very own device. Apparently I can look forward to a clear beautiful complexion and wonderfully attractive hair.

From a kinky perspective, the most dangerous bit looks to be the old frayed power cord. Nobody wants to get involved in some inadvertent electrical play at 120V.

Although vibrators are traditionally associated with inducing pleasure they can also be used for some interesting orgasm torture. Forced, ruined and denied orgasms are all fun kinky options. The shot below features Lexi Sindel forcing an orgasm for a man in chastity, which must be particularly uncomfortable. You can click through on the image to see the animated gif at the Femdom Empire blog.