Tag: CBT

Fixed Comments (again, again)

Multiple readers have reported problems in leaving comments on posts. I have now fixed that issue, and all comments should go through OK. Many apologies for any frustration caused and please  email me if you have any problems in future. I very much appreciate getting comments and it drives me nuts to hear that people tried to leave them and couldn’t.

This isn’t the first time this issue has cropped up. It’s caused by a really, really stupid security module that fancies itself as a censor. Some of its rules block comments featuring ‘naughty’ words like femdom, porn or sex. Obviously on a blog like this one, that presents a problem. I want the security features it offers, but not its morality policing. Anytime they do an upgrade I have to dig back into the guts of it to figure out what I need to keep and what I need to pull out.

For any bloggers interested in the technical details I’ve put them at the end of the post. In the meantime I’ll leave you with a picture of Mistress Evilyne about to do to a submissive what I’d like to do to whoever thought of adding porn filtering rules to a low level security module.

For anyone interesting, the module in question is called ModSecurity. If you login to WHM and then go to the ModSecurity Tools panel, you can see what rules are triggering. So if you post a ‘bad’ comment you’ll see what rule is triggering that you need to remove. Then go to the ‘Rules List’ and hit ‘Edit Rules’. That’ll give you an xml type file to edit. You need to add a section that blocks the specific rules you want to kill. For example, what I just added is shown below. That removes the specific problem rules  from Atomicorp for the wordpress comments page.

<LocationMatch /wp-comments-post.php>
SecRuleRemoveById 300065
SecRuleRemoveById 300074
</LocationMatch>

Look Away

I’ve written many times in the past about the pleasure I take in eye contact while playing (for example here). It’s a way to communicate both intimacy and vulnerability. A sense of acknowledging the presence and validity of the domme and myself in the moment. The truth of what’s happening. We’re playing but not hiding.

However, there are also times where I have to look away. Little moments of turning inward and accepting. It’s almost animalistic. The domme is reinforcing her place as the pack leader. She’s both playful and serious: Know your place, avert your gaze and show your submission. Don’t make me have to hurt you to remind you.

The shot below doesn’t look like the most intense scene in the world, but their respective gazes put me in mind of the above dynamic. She’s teasing and challenging him, while he doesn’t want to meet her gaze.

This is obviously from the CBT and Ballbusting site.

Riding the Sybian

It’s not often you see a Sybian in femdom porn. This looks to be a particularly intense use of it, given the dual Hitachi magic wands also being applied.

I’ve actually ridden a Sybian during a scene. It was fun for a short while but too much for extended play. It started with “Oh wow, that’s intense”, moved through  “Mmmm. That’s good” and finished with “OK. It feels like a small evil demon is punching me repeatedly in the prostate. We need to stop that little fucker.” Admittedly, I am a bit of a lightweight when it comes to anal play, so YMMV.

There’s no watermark on this image, but I’m fairly certain it’s from one of the kink.com sites.

Update: The good news is that I was right. It’s a kink.com image. Specifically from Men In Pain. The bad news is that I already featured this image a few years back and got the attribution right then. So apparently I’m going senile.

Not like it said on the Package

Last night, with Ms Savannah Sly, I had the pleasure of experiencing the cinnamon challenge. This is not, I hasten to add, the silly idea of eating a spoonful of ground cinnamon. That’s a crazy thing to do. This was instead the new and updated cinnamon challenge, where you shove a cinnamon flavored Listerine breathstrip down the urethra. That’s obviously far more sensible.

If you’d like to try this at home then I’d suggest you start by tying your submissive down. He will want to jump around a lot. Then take a sterilized metal sound and, using a touch of lube, wrap the breathstrip around the shaft. This is best done while wearing sterile disposable gloves. Then gently slide the sound into the urethra and wiggle it slightly. You will not need to ask if he can feel it. He will let you know that very clearly and loudly. For the sake of your neighbors, some sort of sound muffling device may be required if you wish to slide the sound further into the penis. Be sure to allow the submissive a few minutes to really enjoy the experience before you deploy the next strip.

I should add, before everyone rushes off to raid their bathroom cabinet, this it not an experience you can safeword out of. Once the breathstrip is in, there’s nothing to do but lie back and enjoy the ride. That means a deep and intense burning sensation for a few minutes, with various spikes and prickles coming and going as the metal sound moves. It eventually subsides to a steady background tingle, which lasts for several hours.

I’ve experienced this before with the mint strips, but they were considerably milder. If you’re at all curious, then I’d suggest starting there before upgrading to the cinnamon variety.

Here’s the lovely Ms Savannah with the actual metal sound we used. This is from this tweet posted to her twitter feed just after our session. If you’d like to see more content from her then you can follow her OnlyFans here.

Oh, Snap!

Normally a domme staring into the camera rather than engaging with her submissive spoils an image. In this case the slightly disinterested look away really makes it work. The timing and impact of the pain is a minor and secondary issue compared to making sure the camera gets a good shot of her.

I found this in an old tumblr archive, but I’m fairly certain it’s from the CBT and Ballbusting site.

Revisiting an Old Friend

Last night I was lucky enough to revisit an enjoyable but somewhat neglected activity – butterfly boarding. Looking back over my past posts I think the last time I did this was almost eight years ago. I’ve done a lot of play piercing since then, but never in that particular way. I know Ms Savannah Sly is always a fan of sharp pointy things, particularly when they’re going into my delicate bits, so it felt like a perfect opportunity to revisit it with her. Much fun was had by all.

For those who have no idea what I’m talking about, butterfly boarding is a type of CBT where the cock and balls get pinned around their edge to a board. It’s psychologically pretty intense and can create a lot of interesting physical sensations. As the cock expands or contracts then it pulls again the needles, setting up one of those awful/wonderful masochistic feedback loops of pain -> arousal -> more pain. Of course Savannah was also happy to add her own variation on that loop by gently pulling the boards or rocking the needles. Add in electrical stimulus via conducting loops at the base of the cock and I was pretty quickly deep into subspace and flying high. I was a good boy, Savannah was all around me and the rest of the world simply didn’t exist.

For anyone interested in the technique then we did snap some photographs. Obviously, these are close-up shots of pierced genitals, so don’t click the links if you’d rather not see that. Here’s a top shot, front shot, back shot and head shot. In hindsight, I should have shaved beforehand. The random stray pubes don’t really add much to the visual composition. The black cords visible around the base of the cock are for the electrostim device.

I really don’t want to see my viewing numbers plummet to zero, so I’ll not finish the post with a full on shot of my dick. Instead let me share something a lot more visually appealing – this is a shot from Savannah’s twitter feed. You can see more shots like this at her Only Fans Site.

Glee with Savannah

I had a fabulous session with Savannah Sly last night. Much slapping, spanking, pinching and hitting was involved. I particularly enjoyed the play we did with clothespins. I generally don’t find them a particularly fearsome tool, so I was pretty relaxed and unintimidated when Savannah pulled a packet out. It turns out that when you put them in just the right spots – where the flesh is taut and thin – and you grab just a narrow pinch of the skin, they really get your attention fast. It was the right kind of pain to push all my masochistic buttons, particularly when I got called a ‘good boy’ for relaxing into it.

I think at one point Savannah might have done the happy sadist dance, which put a big smile on my face. She’s definitely a very gleeful domme, as this image from her twitter feed shows. This was taken in 2009 at SXSW. It’s a wonderful happy shot, and I can say that ten years on, Savannah has lost absolutely none of that positive energy when playing. You can see a lot more of her imagery, both old and new, on her Only Fans site. If you’re not in a position to see her in person, then it’s well worth checking out.

The secrets of the penis

Bustle has just published a somewhat odd article – 8 Tips for Pleasuring Someone With A Penis, According To A Dominatrix. The 8 tips are fine. Just the kind of sex advice you expect in these Cosmo style articles. It’s the dominatrix bit that puzzles me. Aren’t they famous for doing very non-pleasurable things to dicks? And don’t they attract the kind of men whose idea of what’s pleasurable differs significantly from the average? It seems a bit like having an article titled ‘8 tips for caring for animals, according to a butcher.’

Obviously I’m not a dominatrix, but I do have a close and complex relationship with a penis that’s attached to a dominatrix visiting masochist. Personally, given the title, I might have expected 8 tips more like…

  1. Penises are tougher than you think, so feel free to slap them around pretty hard. They’re not going to fall off.
  2. Tie them up to keep them engorged with blood and easy to play with. Just make sure to periodically check no bits are getting too cold and at risk of dropping off.
  3. For maximum style points, consider using the helicopter move when its time to remove any cord. Imagine you’re starting a lawnmower with a pull cord, and aim to get the flappy bits spinning like a helicopter rotor.
  4. If you’re planning to clamp the balls in a vice, keep in mind some men are asymmetrically sized. You want to aim for a good even level of pain across the entire scrotum, not just on the one larger side.
  5. It’s fun to stick needles into the skin of a penis, but be careful not to nick a vein. If you do, you’ll get a big red swelling like a golf ball on the side of the dick, which’ll freak out both you and your penis owning friend.
  6. Randomly ruin the occasional orgasm to add an element of surprise to your lovemaking. Or ruin all of them and add an element of consistency.
  7. Nerves become numb to electricity overtime. So if you’re shocking the penis, remember to keep cranking up the power every few minutes.
  8. If he has an upcoming sexual encounter with a non-kinky partner, check before whipping the penis. He might find that black bruises and bloody whip marks on his shaft and head are hard to explain and dramatically reduce the odds of sexual intimacy with his alternate partner.

Obviously these aren’t based in any way at all on personal experience. Just some random thoughts that came to mind, totally out of the blue.

Here’s a technique that surprisingly didn’t get mentioned for pleasuring a penis. I don’t think that’s a classic boxing stance, or that she’s following the Marquess of Queensberry rules,  but I suspect it’ll be an effective approach. This is obviously from the Divine Bitches site.

The dominatrix from the original Bustle article is Lola Jean, who also bills herself as a sex educator and instructor. Those titles make much more sense in the context of the article.

Rage against the dying of the light

I must be getting old. In past years I could stack up play sessions over a short period without a problem. On this trip I’ve done three, and now feel like I need to trade my beaten up body in for an updated model. I’d love to think that’s because I’m doing more intense play, but frankly I think I’m not recovering as fast. Age may bring wisdom, but it also bring flab, aches and slow recovery. However, I’m not letting that slow me down, and will be playing again one final time before my flight home. While the body says no, the Id and Ego say ‘bring it on’.

I found this image on the Alternative Femdom tumblr.

The Self Sustaining Pain Reaction

My kink-tastic LA 2018 tour (fall edition) continues apace. Yesterday I was lucky enough to get to play with Mistress Damiana Chi. Flogging, whipping, heavy bondage and CBT all had their opportunity to feature in the proceedings. Also screams, yowls, groans and whimpers.

Mistress Damiana was kind enough to snap a few images of me mid-torment. This shows saran wrap bondage, with layers of rope added on top, all based on suspended bondage board. The design of the board is quite clever, as the ropes quickly snap into the eyelets on the side, making it relatively fast to rig. You can see another angle here, showing the legs are wrapped and immobilized separately. The bondage and the gentle swaying movement of the suspended board was quite relaxing, which is more than can be said for the CBT devices deployed.

The metal ring around the cock (show in this close-up) is a Kali’s teeth type device. I think the general idea is to prevent erections by creating pain as the cock swells. That’s clearly a flawed design when masochists get involved. Pain = Exciting = Engorging = Pain. It’s basically the self-sustaining fusion reaction scientists have been searching for all the years, just with the output being endless whimpering rather than clean energy. Fortunately, the spiked vice on the balls was uncomfortable enough to damp down the effect, and prevent a runaway reaction and a critical penis mass. Nobody wants to deal with that kind of fallout.

This photograph of Mistress Damiana Chi is from her site. You can also follow here on twitter here.