Pegging Across State Lines

Social distancing requirements have thrown up a lot of complex questions for kinky people who play with those outside their social bubble. Should you wear masks? Does it even help to wear a mask if you’re inside and in close proximity for hours? Should you tailor activities to minimize face to face contact? What period should you leave between play partners? These are challenging issues to navigate.

Fortunately, for at least the pegging lovers, there might be a simple answer to these questions. Somebody out there thought long and hard about all these problems and came up with this, the socially distanced strap-on. No need for glory holes or hazmat suits. Now you can peg someone from across the room. Possibly even from the next room.

I thought at first this was a joke, but there’s actually an indiegogo project for it. For anyone into infeasibly long fake dongs, and who doesn’t feel like duct taping a dildo to a broom handle, this might be just what you’re looking for.

Pegging Pleasure

For the longest time I didn’t understand why dommes liked pegging. I was grateful they did, but very hung-up on the comparison with regular PIV sex from the male perspective. A dildo doesn’t have nerve endings in it, so why is it a fun thing to wield?

I’m afraid to say that several years passed before the penny dropped. Most BDSM activities don’t result in direct physical pleasure for the top. Whether it’s bondage or caning, piercing or sounding, the pleasure for the top is far more complicated than nice friction at a good spot. It’s about control, feedback, invasion, responsiveness, reactions and emotions. Pegging framed through a simple male perspective of pleasure seemed odd. Seen in the spectrum of other BDSM activities, as a way to play with pleasure, pain and control, it makes total sense. Realizing that actually made me enjoy it more from the submissive perspective. It felt less selfish to indulge in.

I mention all this because of this twitter thread, featuring a number of dommes posting their love of pegging. The image below is taken from it, featuring Lady Valeska. I love her relaxed, confident and in control attitude that comes through in this shot.

Lady Valeska is a London based pro-domme. You can find her professional site here and her twitter feed here.

Relax with a Devilish Domme

Continuing with the theme of gaming and virtual experiences, the deviant.tech company has launched something they call the Devilish Domina Therapeutic Domming experience. It’s a VR experience designed to allow you to relax and release stress. According to this dailydot article on it,

Players sit or lie down with a curvy Devil Girl who helps the player relax with love, care, and deep breaths. The session continues until the player stands up, after which they can play again if they’d like. There are no commands, no rules to follow, no movements required by the player.

I’m not sure I like the use of ‘therapeutic’ in its title. That word has a particular meaning which seems beyond the scope of this project. Also, on a personal level, a red devil girl would not be my first choice for a calming presence. However, I do admire the goal of releasing stress by combining VR, kink and the aftercare elements of BDSM. Given what a fucking nightmare of a year 2020 has turned out to be, anything to help people relax and unwind is welcome. Particularly given this is being offered for free.

Assuming you have the necessary equipment, you can download the experience here. Alternative, if you’d like something a little less relaxing and a more typical kink focused experience, you can try their Dominatrix Simulator.

Animal Crossing

One winner from worldwide quarantine seems to have been the Nintendo game Animal Crossing. It’s not only been a big mainstream hit, but also a hit in the kinky community. I’ve seen an amazing number of dommes in my social media feed talking about playing it and involving their subs in helping them. I thought that was just my particular slice of the kinky world, but then I came across this Vice article and this Wired article. People are even figuring out ways to connect sex toys up to it.

I find it amusing that it’s a Nintendo game that has triggered this kind of response. They’re the ultimately kid friendly gaming company. Sega and Sony were always more edgy, and PCs  the Wild West frontier. I guess it’s a sign that people will always be attracted to a high quality well designed product and then, once you’ve attracted them, people will always try and pervert it.

Personally, I’m an old school PC RPG fan. The kind of games where you start off killing rats in a grumpy villagers cellar, spend many hours in what’s basically a fancy spreadsheet in a nice frock, and finish by taking on the local God to stop the world being sucked into hell. There is probably an interesting post to write on the contrast between dommes liking fun collaborative social games and submissives like myself wanting to micromanage the hell out of wizards and clerics in a single player fantasy game. Unfortunately, this isn’t that post.

I believe this is from the artist Mosbles7.

CEI

Fans of CEI (Cum Eating Instructions), particularly in virtual sessions, may appreciate  this video on twitter from Ceara Lynch. From the number of reposts and ‘OMG. Totally!’ type comments from others dommes, I’m guessing it’s a pretty widespread phenomena.

Personally, I’ve never got the big deal. It didn’t strike me as a weird or messed up thing to do as a teenager, so it never developed into a kink for me. Funny how those things tend to go together. Whenever a domme threaten me with it I’m always slightly bemused. Particularly given the vast array of heinous and vicious that have typically preceded it. If you’ve just beaten, pierced, shocked and pissed on me, then finishing with cum eating is more the mint at the end of the meal than grand flambe dessert to finish. Now if there’s more guys than just me involved, that does get kinky…

I’ve sadly no idea where this rather excellent assisted self facial shot is from.

Update: Thanks to a very helpful reader I can now attribute this image to the Troupe of Slaves site.

Unseen Terror

This is a bit of an odd one. I believe it’s a still is from the movie Elektra Luxx. It’s one of those images you can project your own story into. Personally I like to imagine it as a story of modern black magic. He’s been picked up in a bar by a beautiful woman, gone back to her apartment for what he imagines will be hot sexy naked fun and has just discovered he’s about to be sacrificed to one of the old Gods in her spare bedroom. At least that’s my story for it. I’ve no idea what original context was.

That’s Carla Gugino with a naked Vincent Kartheiser.

Bark, Bark

This @redditships post looks like another example – like my previous post – of a mismatch in kinky desires. The guy seems to have a puppy kink going on, which his girlfriend doesn’t know how to handle. It’s easy to say she should invest in a collar, leash and muzzle, along with some intensive obedience training, but that’s not exactly what she signed up for.

I suspect they’d have a better chance of making things work if he at least came clean about it. Then it’s a discussion and a possible negotiation, rather than weird passive aggressive doggy behavior. Nobody likes having their leg humped non-consensually.

This artwork is by the artist Ikelag. Be cautious if you look up more of his work. I did a quick search before posting this and discovered that it’s mostly not femdom and often seems to depict people younger than I’d ever be comfortable featuring here. I found this via an old femdom tumblr and liked this particular piece too much not to use it.

Be Careful What You Wish For

This problem page letter in the Guardian made me smile. It’s somewhat short on detail but, reading between the lines, I suspect the man concerned was looking for hot kinky sex involving bondage and exciting leather outfits. His wife obviously had other ideas. On being handed the metaphorical and possibly literal whip hand,  she decided that being in charge meant lots of nice massages and minimal amounts of sucking his dick. I feel bad that their kinky needs are obviously not aligned, but he probably shouldn’t be too surprised that his non-kinky wife’s idea of taking charge looked less like a pornhub video and more like a spa day.

I guess it could be worse for him. His wife might decide that what she really wants to do is spend an hour or two with the Sunday papers and a convenient footstool.

Sadly I don’t have a source for this image. I suspect it’s from a UK femdom site from some years back, but my attribution skills have failed me.

Bad Boyfriend! No!

This @redditships thread about a guy who sneakily drank the pee from his girlfriends pregnancy test is really quite something. Even speaking as a fan of watersports, I think that’s a definite yikes. Most of the comments seem to be fixed on the idea of it being a kink, but I’m not so sure. I think for most kinky people into piss play it’s the dynamic and the act that matter, not the liquid in isolation. So while it’s possible he’s acting out some deep seated kink in the worst way possible, maybe he just read and believed something stupid on the internet about how to test for pregnancy via pee tasting.

I believe I originally sourced this image from the twitter feed of Lady Mephista.