Negotiating directions

If you’ve never visited a pro-domme you might expect that setting up a first visit involves discussion around interests, activities and compatibility. You’d probably expect basic instructions on cost and session etiquette. And with a good pro-domme all those things do happen. However, what you might be surprised by is the level of detailed instruction you’ll receive on finding the play space. Often it’s a multi-step process like some sort of complicated blackmail pickup scheme. You have to go to a particular street corner, then call a particular number and await further instructions. Alternatively you’ll get a lengthy email detailing exactly where to park, how to approach the building, what to say if questioned and which doors you should and absolutely should not knock on. There’s one SF playspace that had several pages worth of instructions just on how to get in, and apparently I got the cut down version of it!

Although I’m poking fun here, I absolutely get why people do this. I’m sure most pro-dommes live in dread of idiotic clients pissing off their neighbors and attracting the attention of the law. Nobody needs a horny guy in a gimp suit wandering around the alley behind their house clutching a fistful of hundreds and prostrating themselves on random doorsteps.

If you want to know what can happen when neighbors take an unwelcome interest, just take a look at this story featuring Mistress Evilyne. By all accounts she’d done absolutely nothing wrong. The fact people are quoted as “concerned the children might be exposed to something that they shouldn’t see at their age” makes me instantly hate them. There’s nothing that denotes petty small mindedness more than an appeal to think of the children. However, whatever the rights or wrongs, that didn’t stop the press featuring her whiny neighbors in numerous stories, including one from a national paper I hate too much to link to. Happily most of the comments to this instance of the story, including one from Mistress Evilyne herself, suggest a generally unconcerned and broadminded British public.

Mistress EvilyneThe happy image above is taken from Mistress Evilyne’s site. She’s actually featured in a previous post of mine, at a particularly distinctive London location. If you’re in the Orpington region and would like to see her in person, then her site contains all you need to know. Just try not to slam your car door too loudly when you arrive or accidentally corrupt any of the local children.

Shibari

Hunting around online led me to more great images from the photographer from yesterday’s post. She’s Amaury Grisel and her tumblr has a wonderful collection of Shibari images on it. Most of the erotic imagery I post here I wouldn’t want to share beyond my circle of readers. Her tumblr contains the kind of images I’d like to show non-kinky friends to demonstrate just how beautiful kink can sometimes be.

amaury-grisel-1
amaury-grisel-2

Suspension

Here’s some beautiful ropework to start the week. When I was young and naive I used to think that whips and canes were serious stuff and bondage was relatively easy. Experience has led me to reverse that opinion. It takes great skill to rig this kind of shot and serious physical ability to model for it.

The rope is by Gestalta, the model is bishop.black and the photographer was Amaury Grisel. I originally found it here.

Suspension

Used panties for sale

Men buying women’s used underwear online is a thing. Not really my kind of thing, but I do like the free market ethos behind it. The women involved get an extra source of income and the men get their particular kinky itch scratched. Of all the many sexual financial transactions that happen, this seems like one of the easiest and safest.

If this is your particular kink, and you’re also into powerful women, then let me direct your attention to this sale of Queen Victoria’s Underpants. Admittedly they’ll be a bit pricier than the average pair from a Craigslist ad. At around 120 years old they’re also probably mustier and sturdier than most guys would like. But just consider who the original owner was. She ruled the largest empire in history, at almost one quarter of the earth’s landmass and one fifth of the population. Forget minor celebrities with products named after them, this is a woman with an entire historical era named after her. That backpage ad for used underwear may feature an attractive young lady in tight leather, but is she related to most of the royal families of Europe? I think not.

While I’m on the subject of attractive ladies in tight leather, here’s one offering someone a close-up view of her particular garments. Queen Victoria would not have been amused.

Lady in tight leather skirt

Anal terrorists

I couldn’t mention pride festivals without touching on the single funniest story of the weekend. Pride parades are happy occasions, but nothing made me smile as wide as CNN inadvertently did this weekend. They managed to spend 7 minutes of airtime confusing a flag covered in butt plugs and dildos with the flag of a terrorist organization. John Oliver does a far better job of mocking them than I ever could, and you can see his take on it here.

Should any CNN journalist or terrorism ‘expert’ still be confused, I’m sure people would be happy to arrange a demonstration for them. Here for example, is Mistress Eleise De Lacy about to employ a particularly large example. It’s not terrorism, but I wouldn’t be surprised if the gentleman involved had a moment or two of terror when seeing that in her hand.

Mistress Eleise De Lacy and a big butt plug

Patrick Macnee

It has been a bad month for actors I grew up with and that hold a place close to my heart. Christopher Lee passed away a couple of weeks ago. Not just an amazing actor, he was also an incredible human being, who really should have been the star of those Dos Equis ads. Now I’ve just read the sad news that Patrick Macnee, star of the Avengers, has also passed away.

As this article makes clear, Patrick did an amazing job of letting his female stars shine while retaining the balance of the show. It takes quite a talent to play an equal sparring partern alongside Diana Rigg in a catsuit but he managed it. Christopher and Patrick, you’ll be sadly missed. Here’s to all the pleasure you have given people over the years.

The Avengers

Just hanging out

While browsing tumblr for a good strap-on picture for yesterday’s post I stumbled on the image below. It’s one of those shots that I love while being baffled by it.

There’s a very attractive lady, but she seems to be relaxing in a urban wasteland. There’s a big black strap-on, but nobody to fuck. There’s high heels and lingerie, next to a barbed wire fence and graffiti clad concrete.

Don’t get me wrong – I like the photograph. I just can’t help thinking about the 10 minutes before the shutter was pressed. How did they get here? And what was the conversation leading up to it? Did they originally set out to capture this particular shot? Did someone stumble across this setting and think to themselves – “Interesting gritty urban space. What would really work here is a half naked blonde lady sporting an enormous black strap-on.” ?

HangingOutThe attractive lady in question here is Mistress Adrienne. As you might guess from the skyline, she’s a NYC based pro-domme. If you’re interested in experience her large strap-on for yourself, you can find her session information here.

Fifty shades of spray

The best and funniest article on the new fifty shades book would be this digested version of it. I have to respect any article that can repeatedly feature the phrase “My enormous cock” in a mainstream British newspaper.

The worst one I’ve seen so far would be this review, oddly enough from the same newspaper. The reviewer thinks the first trilogy was a fun and perky representation of a mild female sexual fantasy. In the new version she thinks the eponymous Mr Grey is an emotionally abusive stalker who has serious jealousy issues. Yet it’s the same goddamn story! All the problematic issues she cites were there from book one. She even starts the review by saying it’s basically the same book, with the same scenes and same dialog, just told from a different point of view. Apparently it’s OK to act like a abusive asshole, just don’t voice your inner dialog.

Talking of enormous cocks, here’s a happy looking lady sporting a decent size one. I’d love to see a femdom parody of fifty shades where Christian gets the fucking he so richly deserves.

StraponFunI found this via the OnTheKneesNow tumblr. I’m afraid I don’t know the original source.

T & D

Mistress T has a nice post up on the joy of not fucking her. It’s all about the pleasure (from her perspective at least) of tease and denial. I like it because it’s a topic that pushes my buttons. I’m not a fan of the humiliation slant it can take (the ‘not worthy to fuck’) but I do like the teasing aspect (the ‘oh you’re so close’).

It got me thinking about why sexual denial and frustration can be so hot. Generally speaking I’m not someone known for his patience. As a kid reading instructions and getting the right tools was never a starting point for a project. That was something that happened later, once I’d already dived in and screwed everything up with my ignorant enthusiasm. Learning to delay gratification is a good thing. I just always thought the delay should be really really small.

I wonder if for me the delight in tease and denial came about as a process of transference. Maybe it started with trying to prolong pleasure. Stretching out the moment amplified the sensations. Do that often enough and the happy brain chemicals start being associated more with the build-up than the actual event itself. By trying to make the moment last, I trained my brain to link pleasure to the promise rather than the reward. And while a reward can sometimes be disappointing, a promise never can.

Mistress T

Cheap celebrities

Last month I featured a post on Taylor Swift and her recent fetishistic music video. I wasn’t surprised to read in a follow-up article that a lot of the outfits for the video came from the LA based Stockroom. What did astonish me was that they actually returned the majority of the items. Can you do actually do that? It’s not like they hadn’t been used. The evidence is right there in the video. And it was only $13,000 worth of stuff to start with. I’ve no idea what it cost to make that video, but I’d guess the wardrobe was a pretty small fraction of the total.

Personally if I ran the Stockroom I’d have had a special ‘as worn by someone famous’ sale running the moment the used goods came back in my direction. It’s not like they’re running a rental service over there.

Of course this topic does me the perfect excuse to feature someone looking lovely in something fetishistic. This is Ms Ava Zhang, an LA based pro-domme.

Ms Ava ZhangIf you’re in the LA region and interested in seeing her latex collection in person, her etiquette page is here and her contact information here.