Phonebox Cards

Finding a pro-domme in the pre-internet days was a little trickier than doing a simple web search or browsing twitter. Advertising options were a lot more limited and everybody had to work harder to make contact. In London through the 80’s and 90’s, one common mechanism was to put advertising cards in phoneboxes. The image below is a collection of these cards from Mistress Electra Amore. They’re clearly from a mid to late 90’s era, as a few do have web site addresses on them.

If I’d been brave enough to go looking for someone back in my early 20’s then Mistress Cleopatra (or Cleo-Patra?) would certainly have caught my eye. Of course a blurry photograph on a small card is no guarantee of who you were eventually going to meet. These days most pro-dommes have dozens of professionally taken photographs on their sites, along with social media feeds packed with selfies and candid shots. I almost never hear of bait and switch tactics being employed. I’d guess they were a lot more common 20 or 30 years ago.

Predicaments with Domina Yuki

My San Francisco trip got off to a great start with two sessions on consecutive days with Domina Yuki. I normally leave at least one clear day between sessions to recover,  but having them close together like this actually worked out pretty well. They flowed more naturally together and it was easy and quick to get back into the zone. Much predicament play was involved, which is always a specialty of Domina Yuki’s.

One set-up is shown in shown in these top view and side view shots. You can see a series of cords attaching my toes and my clamped balls and nipples to the overhead hanging rod. The little black box is an e-stim device, wired to the base of my cock and set to trigger on any sound. So movement of the feet or body creates painful tugs on the clamps, which makes me moan, which triggers painful shocks, which makes me wriggle and move even more. Of course, if there’s a devious domme in the room, she might decide that the whole set-up could be much improved by clapping loudly or pinwheeling the feet.

We also did a standing set-up, that’s shown in this image. It’s less complicated but no less devious in its own way. Those white plastic medical clamps are pinching the skin closed over the head of the cock, and are exceedingly tight and painful. That configuration becomes incredibly more painful in any state of arousal. The kind of thing that might happen, for example, if a sexy domme were to caress a nipple and whisper naughty thoughts into an ear. Luckily, should such as state of affairs come to pass, she can always resolve the problem by carefully beating the errant member down with a light flogger.

One of the more unusual configurations I got to enjoy was being fastened down and spread out on a tiled floor using heavy suction cups as tie points. I’ve never seen this done before and it’s a really great idea, as you can put the anchor points anywhere. It allows for interesting asymmetrical bondage positions and a quick way to make adjustments. It also gave me an amazing viewpoint as Domina Yuki walked around me and over me, dragging her heels across my chest or poking into my delicate parts. The low shot looking up at a looming domme is a classic/cliche of femdom porn, yet in my experience it’s actually kind of rare in play. I’m often lying on a table or standing at a wall so don’t get that angle. Even when kneeling on the floor I’m typically looking down rather than up. It was a very pleasant change to both be low down and have the opportunity to look up at the domme as she stood over me and tortured me.

This shot wasn’t quite the angle I had, but it’s still a very striking one. The image is from Domina Yuki’s professional site. If you’re in the Bay area then she’s an amazing person to session with. If that’s not possible, then you can follow her AVN Stars feed here or her Twitter feed here.

Is that a Load Bearing Sub?

I don’t normally like to feature images with big watermarks across the middle of them. However, I’m going to make an exception in this case, because the bondage is just so cool. I’m not exactly sure how it was achieved, but I’d love to try it out. It’s dramatic, aesthetically pleasing and hot in its level of objectification.

This is very clearly by Mistress Chiaki  found via this tweet.

Stupid Dick

I have to admit that yesterday’s post ‘The Bug‘ was written from a personal perspective. I’m currently down in San Francisco enjoying some kinky fun. It was a trip I arranged in January, before the extent of the COVID-19 issue in the US was clear. I debated cancelling it, but I figured if I take proper precautions then staying on my own in a hotel room was really no different to staying on my own in my condo. So here I am, with very chapped and dried hands from the frequent washing.

I was very happy to start my trip by meeting up with Domina Yuki.  She’s an amazing domme who I’ve known for years and is always the first person I reach out to when returning to the Bay area. We had a fabulous session, with much tease, torment and predicament play. A couple of photographs were snapped, so hopefully I can share those in a future post.

One particularly interesting moment in the session occurred when we were playing with a Kali’s teeth device. I’ve experienced these devices before, although this one was narrower and tighter than I’m used to. The typical reaction to them goes in a cycle. They don’t hurt going on, but arousal leads to pain. That’s a hot thing for a masochist, so the excitement increases in a feedback loop until the pain peaks and becomes too much. That diminishes arousal, putting me into a slowly cycling equilibrium. Stimulus balances against pain, with the domme tilting the balance as she sees fit.

What was strange today is that we hit that hit that tipping point of pain, and my stupid dick just kept on going (and growing). It was like a chain reaction that was out of control. My brain was at the point of “OK. That really hurts. Not so hot anymore” and the dick was “Nu-huh. We’re keeping this party going.” It was genuinely weird. I’ve made plenty of jokes in the past about my dick having a mind of its own, but this was the first time it actually felt like that. It was also the first time I’ve actively tried to think unsexy thoughts during a session, which is frankly quite the challenge when Domina Yuki is in the same room.

This image of Domina Yuki from her website should give some idea of the challenge involved of unsexy thoughts when doing a session with her. You can follow her here on twitter or enjoy exclusive content via her AVN stars feed.

The Bug

The big news story of the day is the new strain of coronavirus that has been spreading around the world. With people dying and the economy tanking, it seems somewhat silly to talk about its affect on kink and sex. However, those are the primary subjects of this blog and you get what you pay for, so here we go.

The key question for anyone with either casual play partners or when doing professional sessions is: What level of precaution makes sense? Do you keep going as normal? Stop until we’re told the pandemic has passed? Only do scenes involving full body prophylactics or bullwhips with a reach of longer than 6 feet?

It gets even more complicated for pro-dommes and other sex workers. On one hand getting sick from close interaction is a major risk. On the other, a stream of cancellations and clients being afraid to book means no income. I’ve already seen a lot of social media commentary on this, with a wide variety of emphasis on risk avoidance versus lost opportunities. Some professionals are temporarily relaxing their cancellation penalties to discourage playing while sick. I even saw one suggestion of only seeing clients from certain ‘safe’ areas, both to reduce risk and to reassure clients from those areas that sessions would be low risk.

For those without specific government rules around quarantine, I think everyone has to draw their own lines in the sand. Guidance around washing hands and not touching your face aren’t much help when it comes to deciding on the safety of say genital torture versus smothering. Although I would love to have the Surgeon Generals opinion on that.

The one piece of advice I’d give would be to be as transparent as possible with your play partners. Consent is about making an informed decision, and information is obviously a very necessary part of that. If I have any minor thing pop up in the days before I play, I’ll always email my prospective play partner to let them know. That gives them plenty of time to assess the risk and decide if they want to cancel, reschedule or wait to see how it develops. If I end up too sick to play, they at least they got an early heads-up. Obviously nobody should ever be playing with others if they think they have the new strain of coronavirus, but for other bugs I’ve been surprised at the variety of reactions. Some pro-dommes are OK as long as I can stagger to their playspace, where others have strict rules around staying away until fully healthy.

So share your health information and share it early. If it’s a regular seasonal cold then both parties need to make an informed decision. If it might be COVID-19 then get tested and stay in quarantine if necessary.

This medical themed image is from Domina Contessa Cara. She is based in Essen and her professional site is available here.

Dumb Face

Apologies for the lack of posts recently. Life has been kind of busy. Normal service should be resuming from this point on. If not, I’ll try and find a lady like this one to incentivize me appropriately.

Not really sure where this is from or who it’s by. Obvious a pop art style, but searching for it doesn’t turn up many clues.

Update: This is by the artist Notalkingplz. You can find their work on tumblr and on instagram. Thanks to a helpful comment for attributing this.

Community Policing

I normally like to add some color commentary when linking to articles. For this post I’m not really sure I can. This Huffington Post article and this Vancouver Sun article are quite different stories but ostensibly the same issue. A member of the BDSM community is accused of abusive behavior, the community attempts some degree of self-policing, the law gets involved, and things do not go well. While the legal issues are very different, the message is the same. It discourages people from coming forward and makes challenging abuse harder.

I’m not really involved in my local BDSM community, and have no wise words to offer here. I would love to know if there are positive cases out there where people have had success in tackling allegations of abuse in the kinky scene. It would seem we’re sorely in need of good examples to highlight and point people toward.

This drawing is by Stig, an artist who specializes in judicial and corporal scenes.

Rebecca Ferguson

A final image in my sequence of posts featuring smartly dressed people. The image below is Rebecca Ferguson from the Mission Impossible movie Rogue Nation. I’ve not actually seen the movie, but now I kind of want to. I was very tempted to feature this alternative shot of her beating people up while Tom Cruise is tied up. That looks like a fun scene.

I’ve done plenty of scenes with very smartly dressed dommes, but I don’t think I’ve ever done one with the domme in a suit and a tie. I might have to add that to my bucket list. It’s one of those looks that provokes an anticipatory shiver.

The Boss

There’s something about combining smart conventional outfits and kink. It’s hot in a way I find hard to identify. Maybe it’s the contrast of the implication of strict social norms and then the trangressive element of kink. Maybe it’s a uniform thing, where the costume comes loaded with a history social rules and authority. Maybe it’s because I live on the west coast, where the typical business outfit is jeans and a polo shirt, so seeing anyone dressed in a smart suit is automatically a big improvement.

This is from a short film that Mistress Iris is shooting, with this particular image coming via a tweet by Mistress Eva. If you’re not  a member of Mistress Iris’ Patreon and like her content, then now might be a good time to subscribe. I suspect more hotness from this scene is in the pipeline.