Giving Your Life Meaning

Pain and suffering are necessary for a meaningful life. It sounds like the motto of every masochist, but it’s actually according to Yale professor Paul Bloom. In this Guardian article, plugging his book, he makes the case against hedonism.

I argue that we don’t only seek pleasure, we also want to live meaningful lives– – and this involves willingly experiencing pain, anxiety, and struggle. We see value in chosen suffering.

I’ve not read the book, and these short newspaper articles can be misleading, but it seems odd to talk about pleasure and suffering without bringing masochism into it. People may not consciously identify that way,  but lots of mainstream activities – like intense sports and exercise – lean into that dynamic. I identify strongly as a hedonist, which for me means indulging in both the pleasure and pain of life.

Hedonism is about satisfying desires. Satisfying simple desires does indeed get boring. Eat, drink and be merry is fine for a night or two, but quickly drags when it’s a full time occupation. Indulging your complex desires is where it gets interesting. That’s where you need the full dynamic range of human experience. Are people looking for meaning? Or just complexity?


This lady seems to have introduced a great deal of meaning into her slaves life.

Based on this page, I believe this is Mistress Eve Himuro, shot by Kazuki Suzuki for the Kitagawa series.

Photo Bomb

If you hang out on sex worker twitter long enough, you’ll see plenty of pet photo bombs. As I’ve commented here before, pro-dommes love animals. In turn, pets love being near their humans. That means lots of our fuzzy friends showing up in unexpected places. Or sometimes just adding background noise.

I’ve not seen a photobomb quite like this before however. That’s Domina Juniper Dolor with her pet pooch lurking it the background. He looks like a pup with a plan.

This was sourced via this tweet. Domina Juniper Dolor is an SF based pro-domme. You can find her professional site here. 

Mask Up

I saw an article recently that claimed wearing masks made people appear more attractive. It seems counter-intuitive, but I believe it. Human’s are innate optimists. They’ll always fill in the unknowns with their best version of reality. I’m on a wine email list that occasionally features ‘mystery’ bottles, offered with almost no information beyond the basic grape varietal and country of origin. Logically it makes no sense to prefer to buy something you’ve less information about, yet they always seem to sell out faster than the regular offers. Masks turn everyone into a magical mystery box, and nobody can resist the mystery box.

After two years of pandemic I’m surprised at the scarcity of porn images featuring masks. It’s doesn’t seem to be a particularly active genre yet. Maybe we’ll have to wait to the teenagers of the pandemic have grown up and started shooting their kinks.

The masked image below is from Domina Elara. In this specific case it’s almost certain that reality exceeds the imagination, as Domina Elara is particularly stunning in person. The dynamic captured here is equally compelling.

You can find Domina Elara’s professional site here and her OnlyFans here.

The Danger of Repression

I’d normally never feature right wing anti-vax garbage, but this image made me laugh. And not for the reasons the creators originally intended. It’s from some GOP youth group, who felt it necessary to have a very attractive fake cop pretend to arrest and handcuff their fake Dr. Fauci.

I think the world would be a healthier place if these idiots could make peace with their kinks rather than sublimating them into politics. There was an anti-vaxer in the news the other week pushing urine drinking as a covid cure. I’ve no problem with being into pee. I’m a fan of being on the receiving end of a good warm wet gush myself. But why drag Covid bullshit in as justification for your kink? Similarly, if you want to be handcuffed in public by an attractive lady in uniform then go get your freak on. Sounds like a good time. No need to try and make up some stupid political cover story. If you think this guy wasn’t into it, then ask yourself why he didn’t have one of his dumb smirking friends in the background wield the handcuffs. That would have triggered an entirely different kind of freak out.

Love and Leashes

For many years, far longer than I’ve been blogging, there has been a common ask in the femdom community: A movie or TV series that shows femdom in the context of a normal relationship and as a healthy expression of sexuality. All too often kink is used as salacious side dressing to mainstream drama or as a way to show how broken characters are.

Things have been getting better. Billions had femdom as a part of the characters sexual expression, even if it leaned into the cliché of the submissive as the powerful alpha male wanting to be hurt and humiliated in his private life. Bonding was about professional domination, but presented kink and its characters in a relatively positive way.

The latest entry for kink into the mainstream is the Netflix show Love and Leashes. You can see the trailer for it here. I have to admit to being pretty excited about it. The characters look to be having fun, there’s no fetishistic outfits or scary equipment involved, yet the trailer captures a real kinky vibe.  Bondage and laughter go together in my world, but they’re almost never combined in mainstream shows. Fingers crossed the dynamic of the trailer carries across into the actual series.

The series is based on webcomic under the name The Moral Sense by Winter.

More Deplatforming Bullshit

Linktree is the latest company to decide to fuck over the sex workers. They’ve suddenly started blocking them, resulting in a lot of broken links and frustrated people. Their excuse is that “advertising real life sexual services is not legal…” which is clearly bullshit. A lot of OnlyFans creators and pro-dommes have been hit, all of whom offer entirely legal services. The simple answer is they raised $45M in series B funding last year and are doing the usual hypocritical pivot that a lot of internet companies have done in the past. Build your customer numbers with sex workers and then ditch them when the money shows up. I’m sure sex workers will continue to work around this kind of bullshit, but it never fails to be enraging.

I’ve generally avoided linking to Linktree pages, just because it felt like a link waiting to get broken. If you’re a SW client, then I’d suggest always bookmarking professional sites rather than relying on third party sources. You never know where the next load of bullshit will land.

Mistress Mara Mayhem was one of the pro-dommes hit. She’s a fabulous domme offering entirely legal (albeit painful) services. I can attest to that personally. Here she is in the guise of Sister Mara.

This image was sourced via this tweet. Mistress Mara is a Chicago based pro-domme. Her professional site can be found here and her OnlyFans here.

And the Survey Says

Continuing on the cuckold theme with this twitter survey I spotted from Lady Jessica. It’s an interesting question that, despite my lack of involvement in any cuckolding dynamic, made me feel slightly uncomfortable. Not in a bad way. Just in a – ‘Wow, that’d intense. Let’s count all the ways that could get messy.’ – kind of way.

Although I’ve read plenty of blogs and social media posts from people exploring cuckolding, I’ve never actually read of anyone doing this. It would take a pretty special combination of people and sexualities to pull it off. I’d guess that despite the well known accuracy and statistical validity of twitter polls, this one has a lot of fantasy involved.

This is was captioned by the always inventive and amusing Servitor over at Contemplating the Divine. I  pretty certain the original source is the Subby Hubby site.

Cuck Week

Anyone interested in cuckolding might want to tune into lovecast with Dan Savage later this month. He’s doing a special show to celebrate Cuck Week with @DrDavidLey and @CuckoldressV. I’d never heard of Cuck Week before, which isn’t surprising, as it turns out this is the first one.

It does give me an excuse to post one of my favorite types of porn shot – the extravagantly expressive cuckold. I’ve posted a number of these in the past (for example here and here) and this is another fine example of the genre.

The young lady is Riley Reid and I’m pretty certain the cuckold getting his nuts crushed is Jimmy Broadway. The scene was shot for Cum Eating Cuckolds.

Suit You Miss

This visual loveliness comes courtesy of a 2017 ad campaign for Suistudio.  They specialize in suits for women. I have to admit to a minor fetish for that look, so I’m a particular fan of this shot. While femdom porn is full of leather, latex and lingerie, there’s a sad lack of well tailored suits.

The campaign was shot by the Dutch photographer Carli Hermes. You can see more via this twitter tag or by searching for ‘Suistudio campaign 2017’ on Carli Hermes’ web site.

Never Too Late

I recently mentioned my regret at missing out on a couple of decade’s of kinky play between my teens and late 30’s. Indulging my kinky side via magazines from odd corner stores and videos from London’s Soho was, in hindsight, a poor substitute for getting freaky in person.

That said, it’s never too late to getting involved in kink, as this tweet and image from Dominatrix Anna Rose illustrates.

In all the 83 years no one hooded him, stripped his body naked, harnessed him and strapped him down to a chair and touched/teased him…. Until today!

Good for him. I hope this gentleman had an amazing session and will not be kicking himself for waiting till now. He’s certainly not easing in slowly, as that’s a pretty serious hood to be wearing for a first time experience at any age.

Dominatrix Anna Rose is a pro-domme based in Tacoma, WA. You can find her professional site here and her twitter account here.