Hard, soft or somewhere in between

I liked Rain DeGrey’s recent post entitled – The secret of the dick. The secret in question is that dicks are not binary. It’s not true that hard equals horny and ready for action, while soft equals disinterested and ready for sleep. Dicks can be all sorts of different degrees of rigidity, and they may or may no correlate to mental state. The answer, for both men and women, is not to focus so much on the dick.

Personally when I’m playing I’ll go through all sorts of different states. Typically light sensation equals hard while more sharp overwhelming pain equals soft. But sometimes, deep in the zone, when it’s getting very intense and the domme leans in close to really hurt me – SPROING! The mind and body combination is a strange one. It’s good to try and understand oneself, but sometimes it’s better just to go with the flow and accept bodies can be unpredictable.

PenisTortureThis is Simone Kross (who looks to have stopped working as a pro-domme) and Deviant Kade shooting for the CBT and Ballbusting site. While the body may be unpredictable, I think what’s about to happen next in this shot is entirely predictable. From the look on Kade’s face, he certainly knows what is coming next.

Neat and tidy

The title of this guardian article certainly doesn’t bury the lead – ‘After cleaning a 91-year-old’s bondage gear, I couldn’t look at him the same way again‘. On one hand I can only hope to emulate the gentleman’s stamina and perseverance. Age should not be an impediment to kink. On the other hand leaving sex toys out for someone else to deal with is a touch skeevy. My mother used to be a cleaner when I was a young boy, and I’ve lots of respect for anyone dealing with other peoples mess. People who embarrasses others unnecessarily, not so much.

I’m afraid don’t have any images of nonagenarian’s in bondage. Oddly enough they’re not a big part of the kinky porn scene. Instead you’ll have to settle for this bondage shot from TS Seduction. I like the combination of ropes, head bondage and torn suit. I’m guessing it wasn’t an Armani black label.

Suit Bondage

Food for thought (cont)

After that brief interlude, I’m back with a couple of final thoughts on the case of Gilberto Valle. If you missed the previous post then go read it from a couple of days ago. I’m not going to repeat myself, damn it.

One thing that repeatedly came up in the documentary on him was a variation on the slippery slope argument. Several people, including one of the jurors, expressed the idea that he was inevitably building up to committing a crime. Having started looking at sexually violent images, and moved onto discussion and chat, he’d feel ultimately compelled to up the stakes for bigger and bigger thrills. It’s an argument I’ve heard before about kink and it always strikes me as ridiculous.

In non-sexual areas we never assume people will lose all reason and control when exploring their passions. Imagine someone who is keen on flying. They start with buying a few magazines and video games on the subject. Then they begin visiting airshows and hanging out on pilot forums. Eventually they decide to get their private pilot license and fly for fun at weekends. Nobody is going to argue that the inevitable next step will be to sneak onto an military airbase and steal a fighter jet. That would certainly be a bigger thriller (and one guy even did it once), but we don’t assume the desire to fly will rob someone of their rationality. We typically explore an interest till we reach some sane limit based on cost, availability, legality, risk, etc.

Yet when it comes to sex a lot of people seem to believe that either you have a stable list of kinks and interests, or that you’re on one long slide into the abyss of depravity and illegality. I think it’s because people can only imagine two options. Either you’re satisfied with what you’ve got, or are never fully satisfied, and must therefore seek out stronger and edgier thrills. They have difficulty imagining more fluid and variable sexual interests that aren’t simply a constant escalation of sensation. Of course the situation isn’t helped by some crazy people who do escalate and go on to do horribly depraved things. But exception cases are always that – exceptional. It’s possible to explore non-consensual fantasies without ending up a rapist or cannibal, much as it’s possible to enjoy fantasies of medieval battles without hacking people to death with a sword.

I’ve no idea what was going on in Gilberto Valle’s head when he was chatting online. They were disturbing conversations, and I don’t think it was wise or ethical to feature his wife and friends in the chats. But much like free speech, it’s easy to defend something you agree with, harder and yet far more important to defend it when you don’t. In drawing a line between conspiracy and fantasy, we should always err towards giving the defendant the benefit of the doubt.

cat_and_spider_mouse
This image is from vore fan comics on DeviantArt and entitled Cat and Spider Mouse. Vorarephilia, as described by wikipedia, is the erotic desire to be consumed by, or sometimes to personally consume, another person or creature. Vore fantasies are separated from sexual cannibalism because the living victim is normally swallowed whole. Apologies if anyone is disturbed by the image, but vore does occasionally show up in femdom artwork, and it seemed appropriate given the original subject matter.

Interlude

I intended to write up some more thoughts to my post from yesterday. Unfortunately my first day back at work after the holidays got in the way. Too much to do and too little time. So instead here’s a naked man and a lady doing something to him. Probably a painful something. Think of it as a happy interlude between less happy thoughts.

Claw
I don’t have an attribution for this. I have a suspicion that the lady in question is a NYC pro-domme. But I’m not sure who or even why I think that. She just seems vaguely familiar. If anyone out there can supply a name and/or correct my suspicion please feel free to leave a comment.

Update: Thanks to my helpful readers I can confirm this is indeed a NYC pro-domme, specifically Mistress Trish, who I’ve featured here in the past.

Happy 2016

I hope all my readers enjoyed the last evening of 2015 and didn’t wake up too hungover for the start of 2016. Champagne is the traditional way to greet midnight on New Years eve, and  I always used to try and stash a bottle of good champagne away for that moment. However, experience has taught me that the time to drink the good champagne is at the start of the evening, when everyone will appreciate it. By the time midnight rolls around then anything the right color with a few bubbles in it will do.

The image below is from an advertising campaign for Dom Perignon champage. It was shot by Karl Lagerfeld and features Claudia Schiffer. I’m not really sure what the connection between the champagne and the fetish gear is, but that’s often the case with these kind of ‘artistic’ ads. I certainly wouldn’t object if my 2016 featured several bottles of Dom and a whip wielding Claudia Schiffer.

Dom Perignon campaign featuring Claudia Schiffer

A bad case of stupid

I’m sure that when Tim Berners-Lee was inventing the world wide web, he wasn’t thinking it’d be used to exchange amusing articles on penis related injuries. Fortunately for us his idea took off, and we now get to enjoy articles like this on what people did their dicks in 2015. Its culled from a database kept on emergency room visits and proves that no matter how delicate and sensitive an appendage, there’s no limit to the kind of stupid stuff people will do with it.

I’m kind of surprised there are no reports of injuries from kink and CBT. Possibly that means everyone deliberately torturing penises in 2015 were smart enough to do it without putting their partner in the emergency room. More probably it means that those who did end up there lied about how it happened.

CBTThis lady is hurting a penis the smart way. Clothespins are relatively safe. Unfortunately I’m not sure who she is or where the shot is from. As usual, if you know, please leave a comment so I can attribute it.

Update: The verdict from my astute readers is that this is Sandra Romain in a kink.com shoot.

Conservation of sexy

I don’t spend a lot of time looking at my blog visitor statistics. I used to check them religiously when I started blogging, but now I just check occasionally to make sure nothing weird is going on.

I glanced at them today and was amused to spot the change in traffic over the holiday period. Over the 24th and 25th of December the visit rate dipped significantly. Presumably this was because people were busy with relatives, cooking big dinners and exchanging presents. Then on the 26th and 27th there was a big upswing, which was almost exactly the same size as the dip had been. I assume that everyone who’d temporarily stopped browsing naughty pictures and sex blogs decided to do their post-holiday catch-up.

I wonder if there is some rule of the internet at work there? Just as energy is never created or destroy, only transformed, perhaps the overall amount of sex related browsing is never increased or decreased, only displaced? It’s the conversation of energy, just with less maths and more naked people.

If you were one of those people displacing their browsing of kinky blogs, then allow me to welcome you back with a rather lovely kinky picture. This is from Amaury Grisel.

SuspensionRopeBondage

Wishing everyone all the best

If you celebrate Christmas, then I wish you a happy Christmas. If you just enjoy the holiday period this time of year, then I wish you happy holidays. And if you don’t do either of those, then I just wish you all the best and hope you’ve enjoyed my blog over the last year.

The image below is by Red Rump and was originally posted by him for Christmas 2013. Sadly his blog seems to have gone dormant for the last 6 months or so. I can only hope he’s in good health and that he returns with some more excellent artwork in the new year.

Christmas_RR