After my posts earlier this week (here and here) on PDS (Public Display of D/S) I thought I was done with the topic. Then I stumbled on the image below and felt like riffing on it a little more.
Personally I don’t kink on humiliation and I have a very low embarrassment threshold. I can get embarrassed just watching television on my own. Some people hide behind the couch when watching horror movies. I do it when watching comedies like Fraiser or Seinfeld. All this means that I’m not big on being leashed and led through the local shopping mall in a pink tutu.
On a more general philosophical note, I’m also not a fan of dragging innocent bystanders into a scene they’ve not consented to. However, when it comes to public spaces a little bit of my libertarian side does tend to leak out. A shared space means it should be for everyone. The fact I may not appreciate a couple making out, or practicing their fetch/sit/stay commands, doesn’t mean they should automatically be prevented from doing so. It’s their space as much as it is mine. After all, if it was left to me, I’d ban Ugg boots and Cargo pants from public display. Aesthetically I think I’d be right, but it’s hard to argue from a provable harm point of view.
For me the deciding factor for a lot of these ambiguous situation lies in intent. If you’re trying to piss people off and get off on their shock factor, then that’s obnoxious and out of line. But if you’re genuinely immersed in your thing, and trying to do it in the least confrontational way, then you should get a lot of leeway.
All of which brings me to the picture below, which I thought was very sweet. It made me smile. For all my fear of embarrassment, I’d be very happy to be this gentleman. And anybody complaining about it could go and kiss some other part of my anatomy.
I found this on the appropriately named Kiss the Feet tumblr.
Hi Paltego,
Em and I used to have a greeting protocol in Japan. Whenever we met in public, I’d kneel and kiss her shoe. In Tokyo, we were hardly noticed. I take that back. We were probably noticed but passersby exercised restraint and acted as though they didn’t notice. They probably thought we were just a couple of crazy gaijin. Which we were.
I think a little more tolerance and acceptance of difference in public space is long overdue.
Best,
scott
Mrs. Kelly’s Playhouse
Hey scott,
Interesting to combine a public protocol with a foreign (to you) culture. Particularly one with as reserved and etiquette aware as Japan. It’d be fun to do some fly on the wall filming in different countries and see the differing reactions such a scene would create.
I’m torn on the public spaces issue. On the one hand I do hate to be embarrassed or dragged into other people’s dramas. On the other I also have an instinctive dislike of interfering people trying to enforce common standards (i.e. their standards) on everyone else in shared spaces.
-paltego
Hi paltego,
Dare I say your reticence is due to your Britishness?
Best,
scott
Mrs. Kelly’s Playhouse
Hey scott,
That’s possible. I often describe myself as very English. But I’m not sure if that’s genuinely a cultural thing, or merely that my personality type happens to coincide with the cultural stereotype for English people.
-paltego
Hear hear on the Ugg boots ban.
Also, It’s important to note that there is a difference between discreet public play and indiscreet public play. Often when people talk of ‘public play’ the two are spoken about as though they were the one and the same, which they are not.
Miss Fitzgerald
That’s a very important distinction Miss Fitzgerald. Although in this context the words discreet and indiscreet are loaded ones. I might be tempted to say visible and invisible public play. Discreet is invisible almost by definition, where visible may be indiscreet or it may not, depending on the play and the public involved.
-paltego
Yes, I’ve used the term ‘stealth mode’ when describing public play on my blog post on the matter. It has more of a ring to it I feel but I do like the clarity of your choice of words.