High Heels – Page 6 – Femdom Resource

Priorities

A week or more back I put up a couple of posts on how to initially communicate with a dominant woman. Although strictly speaking I didn’t really do anything, other than posts some links to words from smarter people than myself. One post was on communication in a professional context and one was on initial communication in a lifestyle/regular context.

On the face of it the advice given in those two contexts is quite different. Much like an opening email to a doctor or a lawyer is very different to the opening email to a potential romantic partner. However, there was one commonality that struck me: In both cases kink and sex came a distant second. For a professional the first thing is figuring out are you a sane, reasonable person, with a sensible request, who isn’t going to waste the dommes time. For a lifestyle interaction, the first thing is much like regular dating. i.e. Will you add something positive to the domme’s life? What do you bring to the table? Are you interested in the her thoughts/opinions/feelings? Is their chemistry?

So I guess the lesson here is that if you want to get kinky with someone, start by deprioritizing kink. It’s a bit like wanting to have kids. That might be important to you, but if that’s the first and primary topic of conversation with any potential partner, most people are going to run the other way.

I’ve no idea what image best fits a post about not talking about kink. So here’s a somewhat random image I liked from the show The Americans.

americans I found this on the Submissive Proud tumblr.

Making an impression

Continuing the high heel theme – this time a little lower down the male body. Less a stiletto in this case and more of a punch tool. The inside of the thigh is a really fun place to work on. Fleshy yet also sensitive. I like to imagine he’s looking up into her eyes as she gradually increases the pressure here.

Heel Impressions This image is from Mistress Benio’s tumblr. I believe she’s a Tokyo based pro-domme.

The original Stiletto

This has all the characteristics of a cliched shoe worship shot. There’s a high heel, a shapely foot and a guy on the floor an inch from the sole. Yet, I think it’s a got a really different and much more interesting vibe to it. He looks nervous and that shoe seems more like a weapon than a fetishistic object. He better hope she can balance well on the other foot, or he’ll be finding out exactly why they call them stiletto heels.

stiletto This is from the flickr photostream of the photographer Marcello Iaconetti. The models are Stefano and Adelaide.

The Lioness

I hadn’t intended to turn yesterday’s post on ‘woman staring into middle distance with man at her feet’ into a series, but then I spotted this image in my queue and couldn’t resist. The lady encouraging the man back into the pool is the great Catherine Deneuve, famous for her roles as (to quote wikipedia) aloof, mysterious beauties. This looks like a fashion magazine shot, but I’m not exactly sure for what. From zooming into the text it looks like it was photographed by Ellen Von Unwerth in NYC in 1999.

lioness

Shoe shopping

I don’t normally go for the ‘woman stares off into middle distance with supercilious air while man grovels around near her feet doing something to her shoes / feet’ type of porn. That may sound like a weirdly specific fetish, but it actually seems to be a pretty common femdom image.

That said, there are always exceptions, and this is one of them. Not entirely sure why it’s an exception, but it does work for me. Possibly because it’s actually a mainstream shot for Sara Navarro shoes, rather than being a posed femdom porn shot. This was part of a show in Madrid presenting the new Sara Navarro collection for 2015. Apparently she’s the only design who “makes scented shoes for women, a sensorial experience unique in the world.” Shoes and scent is certainly a popular combination for some kinky people, although I’d guess most submissives prefer a more au naturel aroma.

saranavarro

These shoes were (definitely not) made for walking

Here’s a final shoe themed post to finish the recent trio. We had inappropriate shoes, slightly silly shoes and now we have these completely ridiculous shoes. I’m calling them shoes, but if you can’t actually walk in them, are they still shoes? When is something no longer a shoe and simply a piece of art displayed on someone’s feet?

Obvious as an aid to bipedal motion, these are a failure. But I’m not sure they’re much better for the average fetishist. You couldn’t lick them without losing an eye. Clearly they wouldn’t work for trampling, unless you wanted a trip to the emergency room. Maybe you could do ballbusting, but only very carefully and the domme would have to remain seated. That’s not exactly conducive to a good kicking action. Any ideas on what you could do with them? Other than poke fun in a blog post obviously.

spikyshoes I’ve no idea where these are from. If anyone can point me at the cobbler who came up with these, I’d be happy to attribute appropriately.

The shoes

Images like this make me smile. They’re obviously going for a relaxing domme with service slave type vibe. The lady has a comfy chair, a book to read and a snack to enjoy. There’s a handy slave with a tray for nibbles attached to his nipples and an open mouth for any odds and ends she needs to dispose of. There’s even a log fire to light should she get chilly. And then we get to the enormous clear heel stripper shoes. How do they fit into this picture? Who settles down in their living room for a relaxing read with those on?

Some people even make the idea of playing in fuzzy slippers a tagline for their blog. I can’t say I’m much of a slipper fan, but I think they would actually make this image hotter. Forget improving the plot lines or sexual chemistry in porn shoots – lets start with just some costuming logic.

bigheels This is from the Planet Femdom site.

More from the Brits

Kind of ironic that after my last post entitled ‘Stupidity in the UK – now slightly reduced‘, the country just voted to leave the EU. I’ll avoid going into the politics, and try not to alienate 50% of my UK readers, but I can’t say I’m a fan of that result. My opinion doesn’t really count for much however, as I’ve been away too long to have been able to vote.

I’ll mark the moment with a quintessentially British femdom scene. This is an older man dressed as a public schoolboy, enjoying the English Vice, being administered by the strict English mistress Domina Liza for the English Mansion site. Feel free to imagine him as David Cameron or Boris Johnson (depending on which side you were) if it’ll help you deal with the result.

EnglishVice

More virtuality

Following up to yesterday’s post, I’ve a few random additional thoughts and links on the idea of VR and femdom.

For more background on kink.com’s attempts in this space, there’s a short behind the scenes film from Divine Bitches here. Unfortunately, it doesn’t give you much idea about the final results. Even the performers seem uncertain about the whole thing. There’s also a company working on a 3D interactive femdom experience. No offense to anyone working on that, but I think it demonstrates my point that we’re still a couple of hardware generations away from anything realistic.

The tech guy in me is thinking that we need a standard for control channel metadata, outside the video/audio experience. Imagine a POV scene that had additional information to control things like vibrating butt plugs and electrified cock rings. I’ve had some amazing experiences lying down while the domme stood or leaned over me and did evil things to my genital region. With VR, teledildonics and the appropriate control data standards that would seem to be an experience that could be mimicked to some extent. Of course the problem with standards is that they’re so good, everyone wants to have one.

I also think there’s some interesting scope to play with VR in real life scenes. Sensory deprivation and sensory overload has always been part of the BDSM tool chest, although mostly focused on touch. When it comes to vision the options have been limited just to deprivation until now. A VR headset might create alternatives to do heavy layering of visual and auditory systems while adding or removing sensations elsewhere. It removes an element of the interaction in the scene, but so does a blindfold or earplugs, and they’re common toys people use.

POV Here’s another extreme image of the kind that would work well in VR for fans of high heels and POV femdom porn.

Objectification (of the bad sort)

In the last week the British press has been full of a story featuring John Whittingdale – a politician and member of the government – and a dominatrix who worked under the title Mistress Kate. Almost universally the coverage of it has been terrible and depressing. The facts seem fairly straightforward: They met via match.com in late 2013 and dated for six months. He allegedly had no idea what work she did until someone tried to sell the story in early 2014. When he found he broke off the relationship. In 2015 he was appointed to a more senior goverment position, one related to press regulation, and in 2016 the story broke in the newspapers.

The depressing element in most of the coverage (for example this) is how they objectify the woman involved. She is made to seem entirely ‘other’. Given they dated for 6 months, and attended a number of events together, they presumably had made a connection. Their meeting on a conventional dating site suggests it was just two people looking for a partner and a relationship. Yet in the articles she’s reduced to a purely sexual persona based on her job. She’s a chance for papers to list some titillating details about her dungeon or services while pointing at him for being so stupid as to date such a person. It’s taken as read that obviously he’d break off the relationship when he found out. Everyone involved, both him and the journalists, seem to treat her a non-person once her role as a sex-worker was revealed. It’s a horrible thing to see.

Even the more positive writers seem to miss the point. Articles like this and this use the story to make the point that seeing a dominatrix is a perfectly fine thing to do. Obviously I agree with that general point, but it once again objectifies the woman by equating her with her job. She’s a sex worker, and a pro-domme. Emphasis on work and pro. Maybe she’s kinky in her private life but maybe not. And if she is kinky at home, she might be a domme, a switch or a submissive. They met on match.com, not on fetlife and there’s no indication I’ve seen that they had a D/s relationship. It’s a bit like hearing somebody is dating a professional chef and exclaiming ‘Wow, you must really love food!’ Well perhaps the chef cooks at home and a passion for food is one of the elements that brought them together. But maybe they’ve many other things beside that in common, or perhaps the chef doesn’t like to cook at home, or it might just be a job to the chef. We can separate people from their professions in almost all other cases, yet not it seems when it comes to sex workers.

Given this post has been all about the unpleasant kind of objectification, let’s finish with something more cheerful. This is the sexy and more literal kind of objectification.

Stool