Tag: Artwork

A Dame To Die For

I’ve been watching a bunch of film noir over the holidays, so this seems an appropriate image to share. It’s odd that guns and knives in BDSM  are a total turn off for me, yet I’m a sucker for a deadly femme fatale. Particularly the scenes where she turns the tables on the helpless schmuck she’s ensnared, holding him at gunpoint while explaining what a fool he’s been. I think it’s because the gun in these scenes is incidental, a necessary device to give her power, rather than being a fetishistic focus. I’m actually kinking on the betrayal and the masochistic pleasure of trusting someone you know is going to ultimately hurt you.

This illustration is by Robert Maguire, an artist famous for his crime noir covers. I believe (based on this article) that it was for a novel called ‘So Cold, My Bed’ by Sam Taylor.

SMpedia

Fans of Japanese BDSM may want to check out SMpedia. Based on a machine translation of their front page it’s ‘a non-profit database established to accurately convey the process of the birth and development of post-war Japanese SM culture to future generations.’ I have absolutely zero ability to read Japanese, but the modern browser translate tools seem to do a pretty good job to convey the gist of its pages. There is an English language version known as Nawapedia, but there’s a lot less content and it doesn’t appear to be being updated.

The artwork below is from the site and by 小悪征夫, which Google translate as Yukio Koaku.

There is also a twitter feed for the site, which is where I spotted this image.

Final Gift Suggestion

For anyone still searching for that perfect gift, and not into the boots or books from my previous two posts, how about cushions? The one below is from Regards Coupables, a french artist and is available here. If the obviously Lichtenstein inspired art doesn’t do it for you, there are alternatives from the same artist that retain the humor and sexiness but substitute a cleaner style of drawing.

Kinky Equivalent of 69

Here’s a cute image of shared mutual pleasure. She gets a comfy spot to dominate him and drink her tea. He gets to make her happy and enjoy her feet smooshed in his face.

I’m not into feet as a kink, but this is an image that still appeals to me. Their contrasting facial expression with the shared connection via the cup and saucer really make it work.

The artist is signed as Suzy. I think that’s Suzy Q who has this instagram and is Lady Suzy Q, a specialist in foot fetish sessions (twitter site here). However, given I’m working via translation tools, it’s hard to be 100% sure. Image originally sourced from this tweet.

Use Your Words

Cosmo has an article out on picking and using a safeword. I’m going to go ahead and say that if you need help to pick a safeword, then BDSM probably isn’t for you. It’s only going to get a lot more complicated from that point onward. Maybe start with a good therapist to address your chronic indecisiveness and/or lack of imagination before getting the rope and whips out.

I also think it’s strange how all these articles assume beginners are starting off with heavy consensual non-consent scenes or  elaborate roleplay scenarios.

The minute you’re starting to feel uncomfy is the exact moment when you should go ahead and holler whatever safe word you and your partner chose to go with.

Obviously you could do that, but how about using your words? I’ve done hundreds of scenes, some of them pretty intense, and I don’t think I’ve used a safeword a single time. That has never stopped me communicating a wide variety of issues. In fact I think it’s quicker to say something like “I’m feeling faint” than it would be yell a safeword and then explain what’s going on.

I’m not saying you shouldn’t have a safeword. It’s good to have a single unambiguous stop button that brings everything immediate to a halt. But that’s not necessary for most scenes and most problems. Common issues that make people uncomfortable are pinching bondage, awkward positions, tingly fingers, anxiety, a bad fantasy headspace or just too much intensity in the sensations. It’s a lot easier to adjust for these as the scene progresses by communicating as you go rather than by simply stopping everything. Plus, it saves your safeword for those times when something is seriously awry and you want that to be communicated entirely unambiguously.

Let’s hope that these two negotiated a non-verbal safeword before starting this scene. He’s not going to be able to yell ‘Rumpelstiltskin’ with that funnel in place.

Artwork is of course by the famous Jim.

Off Leash

This cartoon is mining a common vein for jokes, but it’s a nicely done example of the type. I particularly like how happy the dogs are to see their new 2 legged friend. It looks like a fun time for all. Well apart from the domme that is, who sadly has the requisite scowl in place. That’s probably the least realistic thing about this cartoon. Given how much the average domme love animals, there’s no way she’d not be smiling in this situation.

I might be being particularly dumb, but the signature on this cartoon baffles me.  Can anyone point me at the artist so I can attribute it appropriately?

Updated: Thanks to a helpful comment from Tom I can attribute this to cartoonist Derek Evernden, who created the series Bogart Creek. You can purchase his book and  prints (including of this one) here.

Medical Problems

I’m safely back in Seattle, my NYC trip sadly at an end. My last full day there was enlivened by a great session with Empress Wu. This was our first session together and much fun was had, accompanied by a steady stream of snarling and whimpering from me. I’ll hopefully be able to share a few photographs from that in a future post.

In the meantime let me leave you with some light reading in the form of this article on coming out as kinky to a medical professional. Doctors and nurses are a common roleplay, but the reality of combining kink and medical professionals is typically less enjoyable. In many areas BDSM occupies an odd legal gray zone, particularly around the ability (or not) of an individual to consent to be hurt. Simply saying you consented to an act doesn’t necessarily make it legal. That gives medical professionals leverage if they choose to use it. Hopefully that’s an unlikely thing to happen, but it’s really not something you want to have to worry about when seeking medical help.

This artwork belong firmly in the fun fantasy style of medical play. The style seems familiar, but I can’t currently put a name to an artist. It appears to be signed jh 18, which doesn’t mean much to me.

Update: Thanks to a helpful comment I believe this is the work of joerggum, and you can find more on his deviantart account. Fans of heavy medical play should definitely appreciate his art.

A Spanking for the Weekend

A short and sweet post to start the weekend. This cute artwork is by Yumine Guo and is day 3 of a #kinktober challenge. It makes me smile, as I’m never quite sure what to do with my legs in an over the knee spanking, and it looks like this young man has much the same problem. It’s really not an ideal pose for grown-ups, but the symbolism of it ensures it’s always going to be a popular one.

Learning Curve

This drawing by Arrakis made me smile, but I have to quibble about the reaction of the submissive. I don’t think anyone at the end of a beginner’s beating is going to be bored and strumming their fingers. You never know quite what you’re going to be on the receiving end of. Particularly if there is an implement involved. Only the most leather skinned submissive will be blase about that situation.

A Bad Session Revisted

Thimble has published a very emotive article on a Femdom experience that went badly wrong. Despite the fact that it’s very well written, I found it hard to read. The session it describes sounds like an emotional slow-motion car crash. That sense of something careering dangerously out of control, but with no idea why or how to bring it safely to a stop.

I’ve previously  written about my own experience with a bad session in a two part post here and here. That was back in 2012 and I’m happy to say I’ve had no further posts to write on the subject. I’ve had a few scenes where the chemistry wasn’t quite right, or the activities didn’t unfold as I’d hoped, but genuinely bad scenes, the kind that leave you emotionally messed up, are thankfully rare in my experience.

My bad session wasn’t in the same league as Thimble’s. Unlike his, the domme wasn’t my dream domme, we hadn’t interacted much beforehand and for the first hour or so the session was actually fine. Despite my example being very minor in comparison, I found it interesting how many parallels can still be found. In both cases the dommes seem to lack control of their own emotions, be unable to adapt when things don’t go as planned and make negative comparisons to ‘true’ lifestyle players. From the submissive side, we were both confused, off-balance and unable to adapt to the uncomfortable dynamic. Thimble kissed the domme’s foot at the end of his experience. I thanked mine for the session. And then felt angry and upset about that for days.

Looking back at my bad session, the actual issue itself seems like a minor conflict. In normal life I’d have brushed it off. You can’t get far in life without encountering a good number of angry and unreasonable people. What makes BDSM so tricky is the heady mix of adrenaline, endorphins and powerful emotions it creates. After all, that’s one of the primary reasons people do it. Yet that also means when it turns sour, it can mess you up in weird ways for days. Kinksters are typically well aware of RACK and SSC when it comes to the physical side of play, but rarely talk about what happens when the dynamic goes wrong. So while I feel bad for Thimble, I am glad he shared his experience and cast light on this topic.

I wanted to avoid using a photograph of a practicing domme for this post, just in case anyone got the wrong idea and thought it was about them. This artwork by NK of an angry looking lady seems appropriate enough.