The Guardian has a short but fun article on the sex life of a married pro-domme and her not particularly kinky husband. As you might expect the gap between internet fantasy and reality is a large one. They come across as a sweet couple.
While it’s nice to see a positive story about a sex worker and her happy home life, it does highlight an ongoing problem for the femdom community. Pro-dommes are the very public face of femdom, but many of them may choose to not make it part of their personal lives. That reinforces the idea that femdom is really all about male desires and for women it’s purely a performative act. That’s not the fault of pro-dommes, but it does lead to a skewed perception. I’ve enjoyed the Guardian’s series on couple’s sex lives, but it’s a shame the first femdom mentioned plays yet further into that perception. Fingers crossed there’ll be a regular non-professional domme featured at some point.
This very sexy artwork is by artist Soushiyo. Can find more of their work via their Twitter feed and their comic series Familiar.
The thing is, if you’re genuinely sexually dominant as a woman, you’re leaving a very significant amount of money on the table if you’re not getting paid for it, since there are so man men willing to pay big sums for it (and you can probably even be quite selective in who you play with).
Then of course, when it’s your job, I can understand you might enjoy something different at home.
As a guardian reader, I too read this, thought it was a somewhat scant yet interesting read. I have also enjoyed reading the gentle domme blog which also speaks to the real life of a dominant lady in some charmingly frank commentary.