It’s important that a masochist learns to scream correctly. Not to mention moan, whimper, flinch and wince. Volume or pitch isn’t important, but consistency and honesty is. Anytime I play I’m trying to give good feedback about the intensity of the experience and what headspace I’m in. It’s not like I get hit and then think “Hmmm, that feels like a level 7 moan. And maybe a level 5 flinch.” Instead I aim for a natural transparent reaction, and to resist the urge to occasionally exaggerate my response in order to control the scene. When the intensity is ratcheting up it can sometimes be tempting to do that and get ahead of what I know might be coming.
Of course, an expert domme can normally accurately assess just how painful her actions are and how genuine the reaction to them is. For the less experienced then help maybe at hand. It turns out that computers can be amazingly good at judging how genuine a reaction to pain is. According to this article, when shown video of people experiencing or faking pain, humans were essentially hopeless at guessing which was which, while computer software got it right 85% of the time. I find that an astonishing number. It would be interesting to put a selection of dominants through the same test and see if they were any better at spotting the fakers. I also wonder if adding sound to the test would have significantly improved the score for the humans.
Apparently one of the best indicators is the dynamics of the mouth opening. I’d guess this scene would provide some useful training data for the software. I don’t think he’s faking it.
This is from the Men in Pain site. I found it on the Alternative Femdom tumblr.
To be honest, if you don’t know somebody, it’s pretty difficult to gauge the level the person’s experiencing. Some guys can take a lot of corporal but whimp out when it comes to CBT and the other way around. I found the breathing is most telling and the skin, hard to describe, but a masochist will usually have a different “flush” than somebody who just endures to please me.
Does that make sense?
Definitely makes sense. Skin flush is a really useful signal in my experience. Mine changes for sure depending on my headspace and the intensity of the play. When I’m deep in the zone and pushing into the pain it feels like the skin is warm and tingly, but if I’m pushed too far it switches to very pale, white and clammy, almost a cold sweat. Apparently it’s very noticeable as dommes spot it almost as soon as I can tell myself that the switch has happened. Presumably you’ve seen a similar kinds of reactions with other bottoms.
-paltego
I am often quite noisy when taking a beat down or having my tender bits crushed. Her Majesty usually tells me to be quiet or imitates me in an exaggerated manner when it amuses her. Keeping quiet has never been a strong suit. I’m just not the strong silent type.
I generally think noisy is good. I’ve not heard many dommes complain about submissives being too noisy, but I’ve definitely heard complains about the strong silent types who just lie there and don’t give feedback. Of course it can be a problem as far as neighbors and house guests are concerned!
-paltego
Stoical endurance is a bit boring, I mean you feel then like you’re reduced to a beating machine. The sounds somebody makes are half the fun…
Yes, that’s certainly been the feedback I’ve got. I’ve noticed that dommes can often be entertained by extracting an entirely new sound out of me 🙂
-paltego