No means ‘We need to talk’

Ferns over at Domme Chronicles has a new post up about how to deal with a submissive saying ‘no’ to a dominant’s instruction. For those in a lifestyle relationship it seems like a very useful and thoughtful post. Sadly I’m not in that situation currently. However, for some reason, I did think it was kind of hot. I realize that this response is peculiar even by my own warped standards. After all, it’s about how to deal with the D/s dynamic not working. Yet somehow, the calm methodical way Ferns approaches the issue is kind of sexy.

I should probably get out more. I don’t want to develop a relationship advice column fetish. Buying porn is one thing, but I’d hate to be get caught hiding a copy of Cosmo under the latest issue of Tranny Granny Spankathon.

Sadly I don’t have any pictures from that particular publication, so I’m going to my random grab-bag of images for something to accompany this post. I’m going to guess that ‘no’ wasn’t an issue for the young lady when it came time to shoot this particular scene.

Bound slave performing cunnilingus

Found on the She Knows What’s Best for Me tumblr site.

Author: paltego

See the 'about' page if you really want to know about me.

4 thoughts on “No means ‘We need to talk’”

  1. Hi Paltego:

    That was a very interesting discussion. I put in my two cents. What a terrific blog she has! Thanks for steering me in the right direction…..again! 🙂

    1. Hey hmp,

      Glad to send you in a good direction! It’s a well written and thoughtful blog, which is always a nice thing to find. When I posted the link I didn’t realize quite what a lively discussion would develop, so I’ve just been enjoying catching up on that myself.

      -paltego

  2. Thank you for the compliment paltego, glad you enjoyed the post. And yes, a lively discussion!

    “However, for some reason, I did think it was kind of hot.”

    *smile* Control is hot. Pulling him into line is hot. Not letting him get away with it is hot. Asserting authority is hot. Even when it’s not hot.

    I totally get that.

    Ferns

    1. No problem Ferns and thanks for dropping by my neck of the woods.

      Completely agree that control is button that makes the post hot. The final discuss/reassess part involves authority without heat. The route there however definitely has that control=hotness element. I enjoyed the flirty dialog, but I really liked the “Are you saying ‘no’ to me?” in step (3). I can just picture a pause followed by a “Uh-oh” and a “How do I extricate myself from this?” thought process.

      In a vanilla relationship the ‘One foot stuck into the quicksand of an argument’ is a horrible feeling. In kink there seems to be room to subvert that moment into a D/s dynamic.

      -paltego

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