It’s probably pretty clear from my recent posts that I kink very much on positive feedback when playing. Negative feedback is a real mood killer for me. That doesn’t mean I’m not open to constructive feedback or advice outside the bubble. I always want to improve and be a better kinky play partner. But mixing negative emotions like anger or disappointment with subspace and the complexity of intense kinky play never goes well for me.
That preference is clearly not true for every male submissive. There’s a lot of guys out there who love being the worthless worm under the boots of their untouchable Goddess. That’s a totally valid dynamic, but it makes me wonder what the ratio between the ‘Good Boys’ and the ‘Worthless Worms’ is? If you believe the mainstream portrayals of femdom and the dominatrix/client relationship, then clearly almost every client is a worthless worm. Pro-dommes are always portrayed as beating, spitting on and humiliating their clients. Yet my personal observation is that it’s much more like 50/50, or even skewed more towards the positive side.
Obviously I have signification observational bias. I’m more likely to identify with people who share my kinks and play preferences. But despite that, I’m certain the ‘Good Boy’ loving crowd is not a small minority. Maybe kinky checklists should start including a tick box for ‘Good Boy’ vs ‘Worthless Worm’ vs ‘All of the Above’.
This good boy was shot by Gavin Kleinschmidt for Touch Puppet.
I myself probably skew the ratio back towards the negative, although I have had the experience of untouchable goddesses telling me they positively despise me, if that counts.
I suspect many ‘worthless worms’ are merely role-playing that in session, though, rather than having the courage to carry it forward into everyday life. I think that’s contemptible.
Servitor
✅ worthless worm
Ha! As I was writing this post I actually thought of you. In my head I was running through the people I follow via blogs or social media and categorizing them, and you were the first worthless worm that sprang to mind. Not sure if that’s a compliment or not.
It’s tough to get a sense of the split without introducing observer bias. Maybe when this blasted bug is done and I can play again, I’ll start surveying dommes and see what they think the ratio is. It’d be an interesting datapoint.
Thanks for the contribution, however worthless 🙂
-paltego
I’m very much in the Good Boy camp. A few words of praise from a Mistress enhance my pleasure no end. I’ve never enjoyed the verbal degradation that some ladies consider a vital part of a session and avoid Mistresses that are unable to change their approach.
I think there are a lot of submissives in that camp. There was a twitter thread recently talking about verbal interaction in sessions and a surprising number of the responses were fans of the ‘good boy’ dynamic. It’s a real button pusher.
Personally, I always list verbal degradation and angry/hostile interaction as a hard limit. Mixing sadism and happy playfulness is so much more fun for me.
Thanks for commenting!
-paltego