The Pleasure Revolution

The Guardian has an interesting article on female sexual pleasure featuring five women speaking out on the topic. It packs in a lot of complex issues, and left me wanting to hear more from everyone interviewed. From the perspective of this blog, the most relevant voice was the last one featured, that of Reba Maybury. The article labels her as a dominatrix, but she seems to be part performance artist, part political agitator and part pro-domme. It’s hard to tell from the article if kink is an intrinsic part of her life or just an interesting tool for exploring power dynamics and gender politics.

What struck me as particularly odd was this section…

A socialist of mixed-race background, Maybury only dominates white, preferably right-wing, men. “I can’t force myself to be even fictionally cruel to any other type of man. It makes the performance a lot easier,” she says. “I could never be mean to someone who wasn’t white, because the world is run by white men, isn’t it?”

To a kinky submissive person such as myself that seems …. odd. Her white, right-wing male clients will doubtless enjoy being dominated. That is after all why they reach out to her. I’m sure being called selfish, disgusting, misogynistic assholes is exactly what some of them desire. On the other hand, a non-white or left-wing man who would also enjoy being dominated, has to go without. So she meets the needs of those she dislikes and withholds it from those she supports. That doesn’t seem optimal.

I think it’s absolutely possible to mix kink and progressive politics. For example, as I covered here with Mistress Couple and the Trump voters. I also love the idea of Dominatrix Maybury getting her right wing submissives to help her create a book whose profits go to sex workers. That’s a fabulous concept. But as she recognizes at the end of the article, our kinks and our politics align in complex ways and they don’t necessarily influence each other. If you want to punish wealthy white conservatives, then maybe don’t beat or humiliate them if that’s what makes their dicks hard?

I’m not sure who this man voted for, but he’s a white guy in a suit, so there’s at least a chance he matches up with Reba Maybury’s criteria. The sexy bondage here comes courtesy of the TS Seduction site.

The little details

I had a very functional view of bondage when I was a neophyte kinkster. Adding anything that wasn’t being used to hold a limb in place was wasted time and effort. After all, what’s the point of wrapping up toes, fingers or torsos if you’re already immobilized?

Time and experience has taught me that there’s a lot of pleasure to be had in the little details. What was taken for granted suddenly becomes a point of focus. It’s all about the intimacy of control. A strange but hot combination of caring and objectification. Her focus makes my body important, but her actions reduce my sense of self. I must be just as she wants me, in every detail.

This image is from a tweet by Alchemical Seductress. She’s the headmistress of the Ritual Chamber in Toronto.

Minds Eye

This striking but rather unusual image is by Berlin based photographer Pitt Prickel and  features Madame Curie. He’s entitled it “Prayer: In My Mind’s Eye” and I came across it via his original tweet.

I like it but find it oddly unsettling. I can browse past beaten torsos, genitals full of needles and guys being pooped on without a raised eyebrow. Yet somehow a man with an eyeball head mask praying to a domme in a decaying urban space gives me pause. I think its the Lynchian juxtaposition of the familiar, the eerie and the surreal that make it work.

Side effects

Weird question of the week for my readers: Has anyone done a flogging or whipping scene that left their skin incredibly itchy?

Playing in LA last week, I did a scene featuring a fairly heavy flogging and a moderate whipping. It left me with some beautiful marks on my upper back, but it also left that whole area very rough and itchy. Given its inaccessible location for scratching, that makes it particularly frustrating. I’m guessing the skin was dry from the LA heat, and then damaged enough by the heavy flogger to trigger the wound healing itch reaction. It’s kind of odd however, as I’ve never had this kind of reaction before, and certainly nothing that lasts this long. Really hoping I’m not suddenly developing an allergy to leather. That would really cramp my play options.

Given the topic of leather and whips, this striking photograph of Mistress Adrienne of NYC seems an appropriate one to feature. Whatever I was hit with, it was nothing as fearsome as that particular single tail.

Cat with Claws

I just spent 15 minutes in a hotel bathroom trying to photograph the deep red scratches on my legs , thighs and chest. I gave up in the end because the lighting sucked and I figured nobody actually cared about seeing my post-session wounds. They are kind of cool though.

Marks from play are frequently surprising. Sometimes I think my flesh is going to look like a chewed up mess of black and purple stripes, and then when I get to a mirror its a pristine white snowfield, with just a faint red mark visible under the right light. Other times I’ll be puzzled why my body seems so sore, and then I’ll take off my clothes and be astonished at the bloom of colors and sharp slashes the skin shows. Despite years of experience, it’s still hard to tell how pain and pressure will translate into physical skin trauma.

In this case, my vivid long red stripes are courtesy of Mistress Lucy Khan and her vampire claws. In terms of the session they were just an intense but small part. The ribbed urethral sounds and the heavy paddles made a much bigger impression on me at the time. But in terms of a fun memento to admire in the shower and hide on the beach, her claws were definitely the winner.

Mistress Lucy is an LA based pro-domme, with a great space just outside downtown LA. I’ve played with her for years and had countless amazing sessions. Definitely someone worth seeking out if you’re in the area.

The Self Sustaining Pain Reaction

My kink-tastic LA 2018 tour (fall edition) continues apace. Yesterday I was lucky enough to get to play with Mistress Damiana Chi. Flogging, whipping, heavy bondage and CBT all had their opportunity to feature in the proceedings. Also screams, yowls, groans and whimpers.

Mistress Damiana was kind enough to snap a few images of me mid-torment. This shows saran wrap bondage, with layers of rope added on top, all based on suspended bondage board. The design of the board is quite clever, as the ropes quickly snap into the eyelets on the side, making it relatively fast to rig. You can see another angle here, showing the legs are wrapped and immobilized separately. The bondage and the gentle swaying movement of the suspended board was quite relaxing, which is more than can be said for the CBT devices deployed.

The metal ring around the cock (show in this close-up) is a Kali’s teeth type device. I think the general idea is to prevent erections by creating pain as the cock swells. That’s clearly a flawed design when masochists get involved. Pain = Exciting = Engorging = Pain. It’s basically the self-sustaining fusion reaction scientists have been searching for all the years, just with the output being endless whimpering rather than clean energy. Fortunately, the spiked vice on the balls was uncomfortable enough to damp down the effect, and prevent a runaway reaction and a critical penis mass. Nobody wants to deal with that kind of fallout.

This photograph of Mistress Damiana Chi is from her site. You can also follow here on twitter here.

Sliding into the zone

My LA trip got off to a wonderful start yesterday thanks to a session with Mistress Iris.  Although we’ve played together a number of times in the past, this was the first time we’d actually used a professional playspace. That gave Mistress Iris the chance to show off some of her excellent rope skills and lash me to a wall.

One thing I particularly enjoy about playing with her is the way she eases in and out of the kinky bubble. She’s a genius at creating a relaxed comfortable environment, while at the same time building tension and anticipation. That seems like it should be contradictory, yet somehow it works.

When I first started with kink I was all about getting freaky at maximum speed. Minute one was ‘hello’ and minute two was all about nipple clamps and sticking some needles in my genitals. Now I’m a little more chill. No need to go from 0 to 200 mph in just a few seconds. To continue that analogy, playing with Mistress Iris is like being on a racetrack with an expert driver. It starts off easy, and the speed builds gradually, but before you know it you’re sliding sideways around a bend at some crazy velocity, hanging on for dear life with your adrenaline spiking though the roof. And then she’ll glance across at you, casually controlling everything with one hand on the wheel, and laugh.

This image is from her gallery page. Mistress Iris is typically based in LA, but regular travels. You can keep up with her travel plans here and via her twitter feed.

The most evil thing…

I was sad to learn that Mistress Cynthia Stone has decided to retire. She was a fabulous domme, and someone I did many interesting sessions with. That included things like casting, piercing all over the body, a unique birthday card and one of the best double sessions I’ve ever had (with Inga Larsson). She also takes the credit for what I think is the most evil thing a domme ever did to me.

Anyone who has ever played with me knows I’m pretty ticklish. It’s not a kink of mine, just a fact of life. While I don’t particularly get off on being tickled, I do enjoy the glee some dommes get from tickling me. It tends to generate a lot of involuntary movements and vocal responses, which as far as I can tell is the equivalent of domme catnip. In the scene in question, I was flat on my back, tied in some places, but with my legs and feet free. Cynthia was moving around me, poking and prodding in various painful ways, and ended up at my feet with a surgical scalpel in her hand. She slipped the blade into the gap between my big and index toes, holding it against the taut skin so I could feel it, and told me I better keep still if I didn’t want to get cut. Then she tickled my feet.

Ahead of time, I would have sworn it was absolutely impossible for me to be tickled like that and not jerk my feet. It turns out that what’s possible is just a matter of the right incentives. All those ‘involuntary’ movements were magically suppressed and my foot moved not a single fraction of an inch. Mind over matter.

Later, after I’d had chance to think about it, I said “That was just a mindfuck, right? You turned the blade so it was the blunt side down. You weren’t really going to cut between my toes were you?” She looked at me like I was crazy. Apparently it had always been sharp side down.

I’ve done plenty of scenes that were a lot more painful than that one, but I can’t think of any individual activity that was quite as creatively evil as that scalpel move. So good luck Cynthia with whatever life brings you in the future. I’ll miss your sadistic creativity and devilish imagination. Thanks for all the great sessions.

When it comes to predicament bondage and ticking, there’s one artist who immediately springs to mind – Augustine. This particular work is from his tumblr.

Floating and Floaty

I couldn’t finish a trio of posts on bondage and its related equipment without featuring two renowned experts of both the tools and the art – Elise Graves and Troy Orleans. These two shots feature some beautiful leather bondage and a very cool suspended table. I also like the very simple clean space that they’re playing in. For me it always feels a lot more intense and serious to play in a ‘normal’ looking studio space than it does to play in all black dungeon with chains and whips hanging off the walls.

I know from experience that heavy bondage can create a floaty headspace. In this case it also looks like he’s floating in space.

I found this via a tweet on Elise Graves’ twitter feed. It’s obviously from her Bondage Liberation site, which contains all sorts of interesting intense bondage shots.

Triple Bondage Trouble With Mistress Tess

As I mentioned in a previous post, I was lucky enough to get not one but two sessions on my current trip with the amazing Mistress Tess. We split them as 2 hours and then 4 hours, with my original thinking being that we’d start with a gentle warm-up and then get into the heavier stuff in the longer second session. In the event we started with intense and awesome, followed by even more intense and even more awesome, which turned out to be just fine with me! There was a lot of bondage in both, but we only snapped photographs in the second one.

That second session started with a leather body bag, and straps, and rope, and more straps, and some locks, and then more straps. This abundance of leather and bondage was complemented by some electrics attached to the only skin showing – the cock and balls. You can see all this in these images – torso, angle, side and close-up. I should add that throughout this Mistress Tess was spinning an imaginative medical experimentation fantasy, with me as the object at the focus of it. Apparently amputation and castration might have been in my future – but luckily, this time at least, I escaped with all parts intact.

We then moved on to some metal bondage on her pegboard bed, as shown in this overhead shot. I’m sporting some particularly sexy boots, and the metal spheres just in frame at the bottom are actually enclosing my hands. The metal creates an interesting head space, as there’s a little more initial wiggle than ropes or leather, but at the end of the wiggle it’s hard and immovable metal. Everything’s bolted down, so you feel very much part of the apparatus, rather than simply held by it. While I was bolted into place, Mistress Tess took the chance to do some piercing and continue to zap my delicate bits.

Finally, we did something entirely new to me  – a wet pack. This consisted of multiple cold wet sheets being wrapped around me to swaddle the body.  As a newbie to the process I got the lightweight version, which didn’t feature sheets that had been kept wet in the fridge for hours, but it was a still a major shock to the system. Apparently a wet pack is a genuine medical ‘treatment’ that used to be used in asylums to restrain/cure/punish patients.  Tess being the bondage aficionado that she is, didn’t just stop at sheets, as leather straps and then plastic wrap were added to finish the encasement off. You can see the final result in this image and this image. Luckily, body heat eventually warms the sheets, so it becomes almost relaxing. I say ‘almost relaxing’ because of course, with Doctor Tess in the clinic, the restraints are only the start of the procedure…

It was a genuinely awesome experience, and I was giddy and burbly for many hours afterwards. The technical elements of the play were exceptional and, as I mentioned the last time I played with her, Mistress Tess  is also brilliant at spinning a verbal fantasy. There was a lot of tease, denial and creative sadistic storytelling to go along with it all.  It’s unfortunate that I live a 6 hour flight away, otherwise I could see myself spending a lot of time as a specimen in her laboratory of kink.

This shot is a close-up from the first scenario. You can see the white rope pulling the body bag tight, with the padlocks locking the straps into place.

If you’re in the NYC area and interested in seeing Mistress Tess, then her professional site is here and her twitter here. If you can’t make it to NYC then her OnlyFans account has a lot of great content and is here.