Make America Golden Again

As I’ve written in the past, I try not to feature a lot of politics on this blog. However, when politics and kink collide, I figure people are playing on my turf and the story is fair game. If the major TV networks are going to talk about golden showers, then the least I can do is cover the story.

Anyone watching the news in the last day or so will know where this is heading – Donald Trump has been dealing with a rumor that he was filmed enjoying some hot and messy watersports action with a number of Russian escorts. The resulting media fallout has been spectacular. Some of my favorite coverage has been this NYMag article, this Vogue one featuring Mistress Darcy, Colbert’s cleverly innuendo packed bit and Samantha Bee’s more caustic take. Plus, of course the endless social media jokes like this or this or this.

Personally, I think the story, or at least the salacious bit of it, is probably bullshit. The description in the original memo seems kind of ridiculous. However, while it might not be a verified story, it’s definitely a really funny one. And given Trump’s propensity for making stories up and claiming them to be true, I have zero guilt in enjoying this one.

If it is true, I just hope the escorts followed the golden (ahem) rule of sex work and got the money up front. He doesn’t have the best reputation when it comes to paying small independent contractors who do work for him. And if they were working for Russian intelligence, I don’t fancy their chances on filing an expense claim for it. That’d be a tough one to explain to the finance department – 12 bottles of mineral water, 2 packs of breath mints and 1 golden shower for the future US president.

This artwork is by Axel-Art.

What a lovely canoe

I’ve written about some of America’s crazy cultural issues in the last couple of posts, but it’s not alone in having some strange attitudes. All countries have odd cultural baggage when it comes to sexuality and gender. The latest example from Japan would be this story of an artist and her vagina canoe.

As any porn aficionado will tell you, Japan has odd laws around pornography and obscenity. Japanese producers create some fairly extreme (to Western eyes) material, but the genitals must be obscured. Artist Megumi Igarashi pushed this law to the point of absurdity by distributing the data that would allow someone to ‘print’ a 3D model of her vagina. She did so to help fund a canoe also modeled on her body.  Amazingly, for distributing what’s basically a mathematical description of part of her own body, she was found guilty of obscenity and fined 400,000 Yen (about $3,680). The problem with pointing out the absurdity of a law is that after you’re done with the absurdity the law bit is still there. One can only hope that the sheer ridiculousness of the ruling may provoke a change.

Past artists have worked around the censorship laws with strategically placed objects. Mike Myers had fun with that approach in this Austin Powers clip. Namio Harukawa was a little subtler in the image below.

Namio Harukawa artwork

The silver lining

If there’s one upside to the recent clusterfuck of the battle for bathrooms (see my previous post) it’s the response it has provoked in mainstream America. Ten years ago it would have been a fringe issue. Not anymore.

When artists like Pearl Jam, Boston and Bruce Springsteen cancel concerts then it’s easy for conservatives to dismiss them as part of the liberal elite. When Deutsche Bank and PayPal start cancelling investments then it’s harder to make that claim. And when major employers in the area like Bank of America, Wells Fargo and Target start speaking out in favor of transgender rights, then it’s pretty clear where the mood of the mainstream is. Of course that doesn’t help individuals caught in the current crossfire of discrimination, but it at least suggests that the world is trending in the right direction. One can only hope the trend is an accelerating one.

In the meantime let’s support people using the bathroom in whatever manner is most appropriate. If that means peeing on a naked consenting man, then so much the better.

PeeI’m afraid I don’t have an attribution for this image.

Tonic water

Apparently athletes drinking their own pee is a thing. I had not realized this. A few weeks back I covered the attractive and famous measuring it. Now it’s the fit and the fast that are drinking it. Are all these people simply watersports fans in denial?

Apparently the theory for athletes is based on returning nutrients to the body. Which seems pretty dumb, given the body has just made it pretty clear it wants to be rid of them. However, it does suggest a potential marketing opportunity for pro-dommes who are both good athletes and offer watersports. Not only can clients get their kinky itch scratched, but they might even get healthier in the process! It’d certainly be an interesting line to try at the next physical check-up – “No, I don’t do a lot of exercise, but I do drink the pee of someone who does.”

Namio Harukawa Artwork - Man pissed on in snowThis artwork is of course by the great Namio Harukawa.

The pH of pee

Apparently pee is now an in thing with the in crowd. And when I say ‘in’ crowd I mean the small group of people with more money and fame than braincells. The likes of Gwyneth Paltrow and Elle Macpherson are now measuring the acidity of their pee and tailoring their diet to minimize it. Being clear and drinkable seems to be a goal.

Now I don’t want to shock anyone here, but I would happily drink Gwyneth Paltrow or Elle Macpherson’s pee. If they think that’d make them more healthy then I’m happy to help. But back in the real world, anyone looking for a healthy lifestyle should probably steer clear of crazy celebrities and faddy diets. If you think that having clear pee is living the dream then seek professional help. It takes something to make me look like the sane one, but that’s crazy talk.

Of course if watersports are your thing then this diet might actually be helpful. Just don’t expect to live any longer as a result of it.

Golden-Shower
I’m afraid I don’t have an attribution for this somewhat strange vintage drawing. I found it on the Femdom Artists site.

Smile for the camera

This photograph put a smile on my face. Not so much for the act portrayed, but for the contrasts on display. They’re indulging in a fairly hardcore kinky activity, but she’s got a big grin and a relaxed casual pose. With careful cropping you could believe it was a cheesy pinup shot from a 70’s nude calendar. Normally I don’t like it when models appear more interested with the photographer than with each other, but this is happy enough to work. I wonder if this is post or pre-pee?

OWK toilet sceneThe image is of course from the now sadly defunct Other World Kingdom aka OWK.

What’s in a number?

There’s a new sex study popping up on a variety of news sites. It contains an analysis of sexual fantasies divided by gender, detailing what percentages fantasize about what activities. It’s always hard to know just how reliable or well researched these kind of surveys are, but given this one was by the University of Montreal and appeared in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, I’m going to give it the benefit of the doubt and assume it’s vaguely meaningful.

The Daily Dot article on it gets the underling message of it right. There’s really no such thing as ‘normal’ and no matter what you like, there’s doubtless a bunch of other people out there that share your fantasy. The Business Insider article is a little more judgmental and focuses more on the normal/unusual/rare categorizing. Those seem like unfortunate and inaccurate labels to me.

Let’s take for example the fantasy of being urinated on. I know that’s one that has appeal to at least some of my readers. It’s classed as unusual in the survey, with 10% of men and 3.5% of women claiming it. With around 300M people in the US, a naive extrapolation and some basic maths tells me that around 20M people in the US have fantasized about being peed on. That doesn’t sound all that rare or unusual to me.

Let’s put that number in context. That 20M is more than the population of New York, LA and Chicago combined (15M). It’s more than the average of 14M people who watched the 2014 World Series – the cliffhanging finale to America’s national pastime.  It’s more than the highest rated sporting event last week (Monday night football at 18.8M) and the highest rate scripted show on cable (the Walking Dead at 14.5M). The biggest selling track of last year was Robin Thicke’s blurred Lines at 6.5M.  So more people would rather get pissed on than buy a track from Robin Thicke. Remind me what’s unusual here again?

Some sexual activities are a little less common that others. Fucking automobiles for example. But if a fantasy is shared by the same number of people that attend Disneyland every year, I’m going to go ahead and say it can’t be called uncommon.

After using the example of watersports I really have to follow-up with a suitable image. This isn’t actually the act itself, but it’s pretty clearly a build up to a liquid lunch.

Preparation to PeeI believe this is another image from the Rinryu site (warning strong content including some scat).

Unhappy BDSM

I’ve referenced the Happy BDSM tumbr fairly often in the past. It’s not femdom specific, but it’s still one of my favorite tumblrs. If anyone ever fancied switching it around and doing an Unhappy BDSM tumblr, then I think this image would be a great one to start with.

Personally I think watersports can be incredibly hot, but these two seem less than enamored of it. She looks like she can’t quite believe what’s happening, and he looks like someone who just discovered his play partner had asparagus for lunch.

Unhappy Watersports

This is obviously from the Japanese Rose Lip site. I found it on the Felm Cyber tumblr.

Going green (or possibly yellow)

Slate has an article on water recycling and desalination provocatively titled ‘Why Californians will soon be drinking their own pee‘. Water shortages are rapidly becoming a fact of life in many parts of the world, and apparently recycling waste water is far more cost efficient than building huge desalination plants along the coastline.

Of course this means that some kinksters have been ahead of the game for a long time. Not only are they recycling fluids, they’re even cutting out the middleman. It’s way ahead of driving a hybrid and keeping a composting bin. Don’t go green, go yellow.

Piss SceneIn this case it looks like the Russians have stolen a march on the Americans. This is from the Russian Mistress site.

More than just a waste product.

Via the eLust bulletin that pops up on various blogs periodically, I stumbled across this article on a couple having fun with golden showers. I enjoyed the sense of playfulness and curiosity that the author brought to both the scene and the article.

As far as activities go, I think piss play is a great illustration of just how complex kink can be. The act of urinating on someone can be sexualized in so many different ways. It can be degrading and humiliating, or it can be an act of worship. It can create great intimacy, or it can be objectifying. It can be wet messy fun, or an intensely fetishized bodily function. People attach an awful lot of meaning to what’s basically a way to eject waste water. For an edgy kinky activity it’s also surprisingly well known in the mainstream. I’d guess the percentage of people that know the term ‘golden shower’ is very high, while the percentage that have tried it is very low. That tells you something about the complexity of its appeal.

I’ll finish with a shot of a couple having fun with some pee of their own. It’s taken from a Japanese femdom series that has being floating around on the internet for years (I found this instance on the Wet Beehive tumblr). It looks like they’re in some sort of kitchen. I can only hope for their sake that a restaurant critic didn’t wander by during the shoot. I’ve got to think that you’d get at least one Michelin star knocked off for piss play in the kitchen.
Piss play