Bonding

Netfix has a new show coming out later this month that might appeal to the typical reader of this blog. It’s called ‘Bonding’ and, as described by Netflix, it’s the story of a New York City grad student moonlighting as a dominatrix who enlists her gay BFF to be her assistant. You can see the Netflix intro here and a trailer for it here.

I find the premise a little odd, despite the fact it’s apparently based on the real life experiences of actor Rightor Doyle. I know of pro-dommes who have behind the scenes assistants to clean their studio or run errands. I also know that offering ‘forced’ bi scenes requires the occasional stunt cock or two. However, generally speaking, I get the impression that an obvious male presence in a pro-domme business wouldn’t be at all popular. Clients are often nervous about their privacy and sharing their kinks. It’s a very intimate thing. A male assistant sounds like a total business killer. I’d  suspect that the number of men who hire dommes and also have fantasies about the domme’s nervous gay BFF showing up in their scenes is non-zero but very small.

On the plus side, Zoe Levin does look great as the domme. There’s also a chance it might be a mainstream series that shows kinky sex in a funny but positive light. So I’m definitely willing to give it a shot and hope for the best.

Relaxing in Rope

Vice has an interesting article on someone discovering and using rope bondage as an aid to coping with the anxiety. I can’t say it has that effect on me, but I do understand where he’s coming from, particularly with more complex and ornamental bondage. Concentrating on a difficult physical activity can often bring focus and a meditative state, and bondage enhances that with a sense of control and being held.

I also like the comparison he draws with yoga. This bondage scene looks a bit like a variation on locust pose, although I can’t imagine it’s a great position for reducing anxiety or relaxing.

This ropework is by the famous Julie Simone (from her bondage gallery), who was the first woman to win the ‘Best Rigger’ award in 2004. She’s currently based in SE Missouri and available for personal sessions.

Discretion is the Better Part of Valor

You’ll find professional play spaces in all sorts of neighborhoods, in a wide variety of buildings and decorated in a lot of different styles. However, there’s one very consistent feature that applies to all of them – discretion in how you approach. When I’m playing with someone new, they’ll often spend a lot longer on the protocol for getting into the space than on the actual pre-scene discussion. Nobody wants a horny guy in a gimp suit wandering up and down the street knocking on doors and asking if anyone knows where Mistress Whiplash lives.

The perils of attracting the attention of the neighbors is highlighted by this recent story in the NY Times. While technically it might be totally legal to set-up a BDSM playspace, the reality is that the neighbors actually have a lot of leverage. Most people aren’t going to want to run the gamut of loud and disapproving locals when they’re trying to scratch a kinky itch. In this particular case it seemed one particular crazy religious neighbor (who suggested submissive guys would want to snatch kids off the street) was enough to torpedo a location.

Charlotte Taillor – the domme in question – did eventually manage to successfully relocate, but only after a lot of hassle and expense. It’s a tale worth keeping in mind for anyone visiting a professional space. You really don’t want to be the one to catch the eye of the local morality police and create a lot of problems for your domme.

This is Charlotte Taillor and the site for the Taillor Group is here. It’s billed as supporting ‘Female Empowerment & Education for the Kinkster or the Curious’.

Beware the Nipple

Exhibit number 1,024,604 in the case of ‘sexually repressed crazy people vs sanity’ would be this story of a teacher fired for a topless selfie. The woman in question sent a topless shot to a colleague she’d previously dated, which got leaked to a student. In any sane world this would result in a collective shrug. If you were you going to punish anyone, it would obviously be the male teacher she sent it to. He was at best careless and at worst vindictive. However, because this is the worst possible timeline we’re all living in, she was the one fired.

I realize this story isn’t femdom related, but it is a great example of the fucked up way attitude society has to female sexuality. She wants to give her partner a little visual treat, and gets punished for it. The students and the man violate her privacy, and as far as I can tell, absolutely nothing happened to them.

The good news is that she’s sued the school for discrimination. The case is based on the fact that a male topless shot wouldn’t have been any big deal. I hope she wins, but I wish it was less about discrimination and based more on the idea of minding your own goddamn business. You’d think an internet awash in millions of naked people would have desensitized us to this kind of thing, but apparently not.

Here’s some male nippilage to finish the post. Hopefully he doesn’t have any students to scandalize.

Pascal Campion

I think you’re supposed to get more cynical as you get older. The optimism of youth fades into a jaded middle age, which it turns morphs into grouchy old age. Then death.

Oddly I seem to be going in the opposite direction. I’m way more sentimental than I was a decade or more ago. Presumably by the time I reach retirement, I’ll just be a mushy puddle. I think I’ll be OK with that.

The prompt for all this introspection is the art of Pascal Campion, as featured below. You can see more of it on his instagram and this gallery. There’s not really any femdom involved, but this particular image might give those that way inclined some warm fuzzy feelings. I’ve zero desire to have children, but if anyone wanted to pitch the concept to me, Pascal’s work would be a good place to start.

My ‘To Do’ List

This image dates from 1941 and was created in protest of the Hays Production Code. It featured ten of the hot button items that films of the day had to avoid. Amusingly, smoking wasn’t one of them, so that dangling cigarette in her lips was just an artistic touch. A glimpse of lacy lingerie on an exposed thigh was apparently much more dangerous.

According to Wikipedia the code ultimately expanded to around 25 different problem areas, which would be tough to fit into a single photographic still. However, looking back at the list now, any random episode of Narco’s probably covers a significant fraction of them.

This image was created by A. L. “Whitey” Schafer. You can read more about him here. I found it via this tweet.

A Good Breakfast

This is by the Chinese artist Pixy Liao and it’s entitled ‘Start Your Day With a Good Breakfast Together’. According to this Guardian article it was inspired by the trend of eating Sushi of a naked woman’s body (Nyotaimori). The naked man is the artist’s boyfriend and artistic partner ‘Moro’.  Apparently he doesn’t like this shot because his hair looks messy. He should probably be grateful it was a healthy papaya breakfast rather than a ‘full english‘. Sizzling bacon and fried eggs would have made messy hair the least of his problems.

You can see more of Pixy Liao’s work on her instagram.

Sock Stud

Either this guy is the worst poker player in the world, or he is really trying to lose. He’s down to his sock suspenders, and she hasn’t even lost her bow-tie yet. The fact she has a full hand of cards while he appears to be playing with just a single ace might be part of the problem. Even in a lowball game, ace high doesn’t work all that well.

Can I also point out that his splayed pose, with that naked ass, is not going to be a good scene for that cushion. Put a towel down dude.

I think this is from a fashion shoot and features the male model Hao-Yun-Xiang. Unfortunately, I’ve not managed to figure out the original photographer or fashion brand, although I’d guess it might a sock related one?

Cherub Season

Valentine’s day is upon us once more. An occasion that creates stress for couples and depression for single people. I think it’s second only to New Year’s Eve in my list of events that are far less enjoyably than their advertising would lead you to believe. If I ever spot a winged cherub with a bow and arrow, it better hope I don’t have a bottle of insecticide handy.

Of course, one can always find a silver lining to any cloud. In this case Dr Kate Lister has shared a great article on how Valentine’s day is really about whipping. I think that’s a fine idea to build on. Every restaurant that jams in extra tables and doubles their prices for Valentines should also include a flogger with the menu. A restaurant full of couples smooching, drinking champagne and beating each other would be an instant hit.

This beautiful wax rose is from a series called Roses by Brooke Didonato.

5 bed, 2.5 bath, 1 dungeon

My social media has recently been full of the story of a real estate listing for a house just outside Philadelphia with a large and well equipped kinky basement space. Sadly Zillow and Redfin have both removed the interesting photographs from the listing, but this Vice article managed to capture them before they were pulled.

What I particularly liked was this interview with the RealtorMelissa Leonard. I’m not sure I want to buy a house in this location, despite how amazingly cheap it seems compared to Seattle, but I’d love to use Melissa on any real estate deal I need to do. She definitely has the chutzpah you need in a negotiation.

The other thing that made me smile was all the mainstream non-kinky people commenting that it was a real faux-pas to have a white dungeon. As I’ve posted here in the past, for a lot of kinky people, white is the new black.

While I wouldn’t knock the color scheme, the placement of the whipping frame here seems kind of odd. It’s an interesting pentagram design, but there doesn’t seem run to swing a single tail properly. Hopefully the new owner will swap it with the spanking bench from the main room, which I think would be a far more logical use of the space.