Wise Words

@heavy, a very experienced bondage bottom, has some wise words on anchoring body parts.

Friendly reminder that when doing bondage, please remember what is anchored. If someone is standing or even kneeling and passes out/ falls and their balls, neck, hair, etc. are locked to something you are seriously going to harm someone. Potentially permanently.

I’d guess a lot of my readers are likely to be bondage bottoms rather than tops, but you should still be aware of what’s going on and willing to speak up if it looks unsafe. After all, it’ll be your delicate bits getting ripped off if the worst happens.

I remember doing a scene many years ago in a sex swing. I was on my back and the domme was tying various bits of me to the surrounding metal frame. However, the swing was a lightweight portable affair, built out of the kind of thin metal tubing you’d expect in a cheap sun lounger. The joints all seemed loosely pushed together, held with friction and I could feel it flexing as I moved. At one point the domme wrapped thin rope around my testicles and tied them to the overhead frame. Looking back now I shudder when I think of it, but at the time I was inexperienced, floating in subspace and nervous about topping from the bottom. So even though it felt dangerous, I didn’t say anything.

These days, if the same thing happened again, I’d speak up and pause the scene. If the swing had broken and I’d fallen then it could have been a very nasty situation. I’m a CBT fan, but getting my nuts ripped off by bondage on a shoddy sex swing is one of my limits. I should also add that the domme in question isn’t someone I’ve written about here or done more scenes with.

I’ll finish with a gorgeous bondage shot featuring Heavy and NYC domme Roxanne Waters, as shot by Natasha Gornick. All experts in their field, you can be sure any scene with them will be managed safely.

You can find Heavy’s twitter feed here and his professional HeavyBondage4Life site here. Roxanne Water’s twitter is here and this is her professional site.

Shock the Cock

It’s becoming increasingly difficult to distinguish between hardcore kinky shenanigans and new age health treatments. Cross over examples in the past have been vaginal steaming, coffee enemas and drinking pee.  The latest crazy therapy is shockwave treatment for the penis. According to this Guardian article, tech CEO Bryan Johnson ‘invented’ the approach.

“You have a wand and you sit in a chair and then the technician uses the wand and basically shocks your penis,” Johnson explained. He went on to say that the treatment does the same thing exercise does to the rest of the body, where you are creating micro-injuries so that the tissue rebuilds itself stronger than before. He rated the pain of the shocks as seven out of 10, and nine out of 10 at the tip.

I hadn’t realized that all my years of CBT play were actually strengthening my penis. Given the number of shocks I’ve received from leather clad ‘technicians’ by now I should have the ability to crack concrete with a well placed thrust. Admittedly, my shocks were mostly of the electrical kind, where I think Bryan’s technicians are using sound to generate shockwaves, but a micro-injury is a micro-injury however it’s created. Who knew all those kinky sessions were creating the penile equivalent of an Olympic athlete in my pants?

Given the crazy state of US healthcare, I’m guessing the cost of this ‘treatment’ is astronomical. Bryan should try looking up some of his local pro-dommes. I’m sure they’d be happy to inflict any kind of injury based strengthening routine he’d like to try. He could probably get his nipples and butt strengthened as well for no extra change.

This is the NYC based Mistress Sade treating one of her patients. No doubt he’ll emerge fitter and healthier at the end of it. This was sourced via this tweet on Mistress Sade’s Twitter feed.

Alpha Inn

I don’t think I’ve ever featured Tokyo’s Alpha Inn before. Which is kind of surprising, given it’s a somewhat famous in kinky circles as the only Love Hotel in Tokyo dedicated to BDSM. It seems to be a go to spot for a lot of pro-dommes who visit Tokyo.

I was reminded of it by this article in Huck magazine. It gives some context on the place itself and the people who play and work there. The photographer for the article is Nathalie Daoust, who spent several months their creating a series called Tokyo Hotel Story. The image below is from that series.

ESH

One of my guilty time wasting pleasures is reading Am I The Asshole on Reddit. It’s fun to sit in judgement on random strangers and boil complex situations down to one of the forums standard labels: NTA (Not The Asshole), YTA (You’re The Asshole), NAH (No Assholes Here) or ESH (Everyone Sucks Here).

I was reminded of it when reading this LA Time article on a relationship gone wrong thanks to undisclosed kinks. I’d say it’s clearly a case of ESH. The writer for being judgmental, snarky and unwilling to be GGG. Her ex for keeping his kinks quiet until months into the relationship and then dumping them all out. Both of them for bad communication.

I get that it’s pretty tough to share kinks when you’ve just started dating, but pushing the reveal out by months can never be a good plan. If they are potentially kinky then better to start communicating and having fun together sooner. If it’s a deal-breaker then there’s no need to waste everyone’s time. And, if you’re hoping someone’s need to maintain a relationship will persuade them to do things they don’t really want to, then YTA.

From the article it seemed like the sub was a fan of latex and fetishwear. So here’s an image in honor of that.

I found on an old tumblr site. From hunting around I believe that is the German domme Patrizia Von Bergfeld.

Kinky Dating

The New York Times recently published an article on the Feeld dating app and its CEO Ms. Kirova. I’d not heard of it before, but apparently its becoming popular in kinky circles.

Feeld, which started as a dating app for couples and singles called 3nder in 2014, has, under Ms. Kirova’s leadership, positioned itself as a go-to for nonmonogamous, sex-positive and kinky people of all sexual orientations.

It’s also acquired a reputation as a space that fosters directness, something of a rarity in the dating-app world.

Its userbase is relatively small compared to the giants like Tinder and Grindr but, based on the article at least, it seems to be doing a passable job of encouraging clear communication while not turning into a cesspool of toxic content and sex crazed jerks. Although, sadly, there’s always going to be a non-trivial contingent of those in any online space (as the article highlights).  Be interested to hear if any of my readers have tried it.

Of course the time honored ways to meet a partner will never go entirely out of fashion. The beautiful image below is a wedding photograph for @nivalislava. According to the twitter thread I sourced it from they originally met at college. It’s fetish rather than femdom, but I love it just the same.

Pony Fun

Fans of Pony Play might want to check out the stories of I. Binder, some of which are available on Gagged Utopia. The site seems broken in a bunch of places, but you can see a number of them listed under the PonyPlay tag here. For example, this, this, this and this. Looks like there’s also some on Amazon if you wish to purchase them.

I’m not sure it’d be a kink I’d want to indulge during an actual session. Too old and too many wonky back muscles for pulling people around. However, the fantasy is nice and the I. Binder stories are very well written. They got me interested in a kink that had never really clicked with me before.

I sourced this image from Madam is All tumblr. Reverse image searching didn’t give me any leads, but I believe that’s Mistress Trinity, an NYC based pro-domme.  I previously featured an image that looks to be from the same shoot here.

Be Your Own Pet

Find of the week has been Nashville garage punk band Be Your Own Pet. Their new album is ‘Mommy‘ and a glance at the associated cover image (below) will make it clear why they first caught my eye. Their promo video for it is a lot of fun – full of fetish, kitsch and old school horror movie shots. Fortunately there’s some great music to go with all the cheese – their new track Worship The Whip being a particularly catchy (and kinky) example. Well worth checking out if you’re also a fan of the punk genre.

Out and About in Paris

To continue my celebration of Summer, here’s one final post on the theme of ladies enjoying their lunch al fresco. This is, of course, the unforgettable Mistress Iris, dining in Paris with her gimpy. Her beauty and grace will turn heads at the best of times, but I suspect this dining excursion probably turned ever more than usual.

This image was sourced here from the twitter feed of Mistress Iris. You can find her professional site here, her Patreon here and her OnlyFans here.

Meta Muppets

I’m always amazed when I spot a sex worker or erotic content creator with an Instagram account. It has to be the least sex friendly social media site around. My feeds are frequently full of sex workers complaining about their accounts being killed with little to no warning. Recently they even had a burst of banning general sex positive accounts, that weren’t explicit or sex work related. Some of these got reversed, but I wouldn’t bet against future waves of similar bans. If you are using Instagram for anything adult related, it’s best to treat it as a throwaway that might be lost at anytime.

Mistress Estelle Leon is another recent casualty of the capricious Instagram algorithm. How stupid does a platform have to be to deliberately ban beautiful images like this one?

Mistress Estelle is a Melbourne based pro-domme. She may have lost her Instagram account, but you can still follow here on Twitter and visit her professional site here.