Funny – Femdom Resource

Make America Golden Again

As I’ve written in the past, I try not to feature a lot of politics on this blog. However, when politics and kink collide, I figure people are playing on my turf and the story is fair game. If the major TV networks are going to talk about golden showers, then the least I can do is cover the story.

Anyone watching the news in the last day or so will know where this is heading – Donald Trump has been dealing with a rumor that he was filmed enjoying some hot and messy watersports action with a number of Russian escorts. The resulting media fallout has been spectacular. Some of my favorite coverage has been this NYMag article, this Vogue one featuring Mistress Darcy, Colbert’s cleverly innuendo packed bit and Samantha Bee’s more caustic take. Plus, of course the endless social media jokes like this or this or this.

Personally, I think the story, or at least the salacious bit of it, is probably bullshit. The description in the original memo seems kind of ridiculous. However, while it might not be a verified story, it’s definitely a really funny one. And given Trump’s propensity for making stories up and claiming them to be true, I have zero guilt in enjoying this one.

If it is true, I just hope the escorts followed the golden (ahem) rule of sex work and got the money up front. He doesn’t have the best reputation when it comes to paying small independent contractors who do work for him. And if they were working for Russian intelligence, I don’t fancy their chances on filing an expense claim for it. That’d be a tough one to explain to the finance department – 12 bottles of mineral water, 2 packs of breath mints and 1 golden shower for the future US president.

This artwork is by Axel-Art.

Better than an overdue fine

The sexy dominant librarian is a not uncommon femdom theme. I have to admit to being a sucker for it, despite its cliched nature. This cartoon from Grant Snider is one of the more amusing takes on it that I’ve spotted. It’s not often you see an old fashioned library card catalog used in a bondage scene.

Fuckingham Palace

I was pretty surprised to find myself creating a royal wedding post earlier this week. As I said in the post, I’d had zero interest in the event and the surrounding media hoopla. However, that pegging plate was just too good to ignore.

So you can imagine my surprise to find myself creating yet another post on the same subject. This time it’s a video clip that’s caught my attention. The clip in question is from the Daily Show, and can be seen here. It’s certainly not the funniest bit of writing they’ve come up with, but as soon as I saw the show I knew I wouldn’t be able to resist referencing it. I’m not sure if it’s something about this particular couple, or just that everyone assumes the British aristocracy is packed with kinky perverts, but Kate screwing William appears to be a popular idea. Perhaps Peter Acworth over at kink.com should start thinking about spinning up a RoyalBitches.com? Or maybe PrincesInPain.com?

Pegging, by Royal Appointment.

Despite my British background, I’ve had zero interest in the recent royal wedding. About the only entertaining aspect was the cheap commemorative rubbish that showed up for sale on late night television. I particularly enjoyed the replica engagement ring, complete with a real faux sapphire, genuine cubic zirconia surround, silver plate metal and velveteen presentation box, yours for only $19.99. A real heirloom to treasure and hand down to the kids.

However, that unintentionally amusing souvenir has now been replaced in my affections with this fantastic ceramic piece. Pretty much any aspect of popular culture get interpreted on the internet in a pornographic manner (as stated in rule 34), but it’s rare to see it take the form of a commemorative plate. She looks like she’s enjoying herself, although he doesn’t appear to be showing the stiff upper lip that should be expected.

I’ve no idea how genuine it is, but should you have a spot reserved in your china cabinet for that one special piece, then it’s allegedly available at Gribsby’s Shop.

If they only knew

The majority of blogs on my blogroll are femdom related, but I have a few that are more generally kink or sex related. One of these, Under His Hand by Kaya, is specifically about a male dominant relationship and typically doesn’t overlap with the typical material I post here. However, I enjoy reading it for the very open and honest way she discusses the ups and downs of her D/s relationship. The problems of fitting BDSM play around families and dealing with D/s dynamics outside a stereotypical dungeon space, are common problems for a lot of kinky people. And of course, a fun description of an intense BDSM scene is always entertaining, whichever gender is on the top!

I think one of her recent posts, called ‘If they only knew’, would resonate with a lot of kinky people. She describes visiting a tattoo parlor with her daughter, and the gentle teasing she receives as the straight-laced mom, hanging out with all the ‘freaks’ into piercings and tattoos. Little do they know about all the freaky stuff mom likes to do with needles and blood and pain….

Personally I find that there is something very pleasurable about keeping this kind of happy secret. I always enjoy quietly deflecting questions about what I was doing or where I was on a particular play night. Although I do sometimes run through some possible answers in my head:

“Oh, sorry I couldn’t meet you guys for drinks. I was being tied down by a beautiful woman who wanted to push a whole bunch of needles through my cock.”

“Sorry I’m late. I just spent the last couple of hours with an electrified plug up my ass and a plastic bag over my head. It made it a little tricky to get away.”

Maybe one day I’ll spring one of these answers on an unsuspecting friend. Although I think I’ll try and do it when we’re at a bar and they’ve just taken a mouthful of drink. That should maximize the entertainment value of the reaction.

Hanna and Barbera would not have approved

On seeing the image below I couldn’t help but think of this quote.

Garth: Did you ever find Bugs Bunny attractive when he put on a dress and played a girl bunny?
Wayne: [Laughing] No.
Garth: Neither did I. I was just asking.

Waynes World (1992)

And while transvestism seemed to be a frequent feature of Bugs Bunny cartoons, I’ve never thought of Tom and Jerry being into S&M. Although Tom as a masochist does make some kind of sense. He always seems suspiciously ineffectual at dodging Jerry’s painful plans for him.

The domme in this case is Toodles Galore, a minor character who occasionally played the love interest for Tom.

Madame Loreen at the OWK

OWK has created a lot of high quality but fairly conventional femdom material over the years. That is if material from a micronation set in a 16th Century Czech Chateau dedicated to the idea of female supremacy can ever be regarded as conventional. Not many femdom sites have their own flag, coat of arms, motto and state hymn.

This image, on the other hand, must rank as one of their less conventional shots. There’s the usual naked slaves, leather outfits and whips. But rather than brandishing a crop and sneering at the camera, Madame Loreen (right) looks like she’s about to break into a spirited rendition of YMCA. And Mistress Christine (left) appears to be contemplating a switch from whipping the slave to whipping some sense into Loreen. Clearly she’s not a fan of that particular form of torture….