Fm – Page 142 – Femdom Resource

Bittersweet

I’m continuing my vacation strategy of featuring alternative posts from blogs that I enjoy. In this case the ~~victim~~ lucky author is Femi with her post entitled Letter to a Masochist. It’s a bittersweet kind of post, that manages to be hot, creative and a touch melancholy.

I want to give you bruises that don’t fade for a week.
I want to think, “I hope the neighbors don’t call the cops.”
I want to rub my hand over your flesh that’s hot to the touch.
I want to be sore the next day from that much energy expended.
I want to be the answer to your needs.
I want this hypothetical you to exist, to find me, to say, “yes,” and “more,” and, “please.”
If I feel like I’ve waited a lifetime for you, it’s because I have. Already I feel jaded.
Come into existence for me.
Femi – Letter to a Masochist

The first part is definitely hot, and the last part a little sad, but the line about the neighbors made me smile. I actually know of a Seattle couple that ‘soundproofed’ their basement before starting to crack the whip. Unfortunately the soundproofing wasn’t up the job and, in a moment of true genius, they hadn’t thought to check from the outside before getting their freak on. Sure enough, the neighbors called the cops. Doubly unfortunate for them was the fact that Seattle mandates that for domestic violence calls somebody is always taken away. I get the logic of that, but it doesn’t leave a lot of room for discretion. So despite protestations that it was all consensual and the screaming was just part of the fun, the husband ended up (temporarily) in the pokey. Everything worked out OK in the end, but I’ve got to imagine the subsequent conversations with the neighbors were a little embarrassing.

The two illustrative images I’ve chosen below are from Dana Kane, a professional disciplinarian based out of Las Vegas. Given Femi’s comments about bruising and hot flesh they seemed appropriate. They’re from this video sequence.

Comfort

Vegas has been a bit of a mixed bag so far. On the plus side I did fit in some kinky fun, and I learned a new interesting activity involving electricity. I’ll write more about that in a future post. Unfortunately I then picked up some stupid bug and have spent the last day or so curled up in my hotel room feeling like death. Being on vacation and being sick sucks. The ability to order room service is nice, but quite honestly when you’re ill the thing you really want is your own couch and the chance to curl up with comforting familiar things.

Image of comfort is from the StellaNova’s Realm tumblr.

Slacking off again

I’m back in Las Vegas for a long weekend. It might seem I love this place, given I’ve been twice in as many months, but I’m really only here because of friends. It’s a fun environment for a few days, but it’s not particularly kink friendly and there are no good cocktail bars. It’s basically gambling, food and nice hotels. Which is fine for a few days, but not an extended visit.

I’m hoping that this time I’ll be able to fit in a little kinky play between poker hands. I’ll let you know how that goes. In the meantime I’m in slacker mode when it comes to posting, so apologies in advance for that. To keep things ticking over I’ll leave you with a little eye candy. This is from the Femi’s Deviantly Romantic tumblr.

The ambiguous orange

I like the ambiguity of this image. It can be read several ways. Some might see it as a femdom shot, with the woman sitting over the man feeding him what she chooses. Others might see it as maledom, with the man relaxing while she carefully peels and feeds him succulent fruit. And some (most?) might see no D/s at all, with just as a relaxed couple enjoying the sensual sharing of a fruit. Sometimes an orange is just an orange.

I found the image on the Nympho Ninjas site.

Simplify your vagina

My latest favorite way to kill a few minutes between emails is the Least Helpful site. It bills itself as ‘Daily Dispatches from the Internet’s Worst Reviewers’, and contains everything from sensitive Nazi’s to olfactory innovators.

As far as this blog goes, there are a few sex related ones. I kind of liked the guy trying to cure the aches and pains in his G-Spot, and the very unimaginative handcuff purchaser. Not to mention the guy who seems to have penises on the brain (and in the ears). But my absolute favorite was this review for She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman. I’ve no idea if the book is good, but I did learn something about the reviewer.

Women, simplify your vaginas. Make it work without making us read long books on a useless topic

I might be going out on a limb here, but something tells me he may not be a particularly sensitive and selfless lover. Or all that knowledgeable about female anatomy.

The obvious answer for him is that he should just stick to the cock. I’m guessing he’s pretty experienced with his own. If he has any difficulty I’m sure someone like Mistress T would be happy to guide him in the right direction.

Should by some miracle he find himself a lady who’ll let him near her very complex lady parts, she could try a firm hand to encourage him to learn. But I suspect the best plan is just to take him out of the equation altogether, in the manner of the image below. That’ll keep things nice and simple for him.

I found this on the Thoughts of a Dork (aka ephanyroyce) tumblr. It’s originally from Divine Bitches.

Just the bare essentials

I continue to mull over the ‘Desert Island Kinky Toy’ concept that I mentioned in yesterday’s post. If you haven’t read that yet, I suggest starting there before going any further. It’ll be less confusing that way.

As well as music, the island castaway also gets to choose one book to take, but the Bible and the complete works of Shakespeare are also always provided. I assume they did this to prevent lots of people picking them and thus making the book selection a less interesting part of the show. I’m not sure if these two would be the standard provision if the show started today, but they probably made a lot of sense to the gentlemen running the BBC in the 1940’s.

It got me to thinking: In the BDSM version of the show (as produced and directed by yours truly), what would be automatically given to the kinky castaways? In other words, what two items would be on almost everyone’s list, and therefore should be provided by default to avoid repitition?

I think an obvious one is rope. Great for bondage, gags, makeshift leashes, suspension from palm trees, staking people out on the beach, etc. Useful in a multitude of ways, I think it’d be something everyone would pick. Plus, years as a castaway might actually give you time to complete at least one of those fancy rope corset arrangements that look so cool.

After that obvious selection it gets a little more difficult. A whip? A bit single-purpose and not everyone’s taste. A cane? Probably easy enough to mimic from local flora and fauna. A strap-on? Chastity device? Needles? All great, but all specialist choices that not everyone would take. Quite honestly I pondered this question all day at work. I almost answered ‘nipple clamps’ to a question in a meeting on data center construction, which would at least have livened the discussion up.

It wasn’t until I was making dinner tonight that I figured out what I think is the answer – a big bed with loads of tie points. Something like this or this. It’s so versatile that everyone could use it. Good for bondage, corporal, breathplay, fucking, massage, medical and even sleeping if all that tires you out. Try doing all that on a canvas hammock slung between a couple of palm trees. Despite playing with a lot of great custom made dungeon furniture over the last few years, a lot of my best scenes have happened on a bed.

Annoyingly I couldn’t quickly locate any suitable shots featuring ropes and beds, so here’s a nice one that’s heavy on the rope and adds a little whipping into the mix.

I found this on the Fun Fantasies tumblr. It’s obviously originally from Men in Pain.

Desert Island Toys

There’s a very famous radio show in the UK called Desert Island Discs. It has run since the 1940’s with a format that has never been altered. They invite a guest on and he or she has to pick the 8 pieces of music they’d want to have with them if they were stranded on a desert island. They also get to nominate a single book and a luxury item to take. The show revolves around playing the music and discussing why they made those choices.

It’s a very adaptable format for all sorts of specialist areas and tonight, over a glass of wine, I got to mulling what my BDSM desert island toys would be. I didn’t really settle on a final list, but there was always one constant on any list I came up with – sharp, tight plastic clips. A lot of other toys get all the glory. Canes, whips, boots and rope feature everywhere and tend to hog the limelight. Spring loaded clips don’t look all that sexy, don’t feature in classic BDSM erotica and are never fetishized. Yet they’re incredible versatile for creating interesting painful sensations and have featured in some of my favorite scenes (one of which I wrote about here). Definitely something that’d be packed in my steamer chest for any isolated tropical vacations.

I found this shot on the Beyond the Valley of the Femdoms tumblr. Like a lot of images I feature, it was their expressions that drew me to it. They both look happy, but in very different ways.

The munchies

It’s Thanksgiving in America. As an Englishman I didn’t grow up with the holiday, so it doesn’t have quite the same resonance for me as I think it does for a lot of my American friends. However, I do always enjoy getting together with friends for a good nosh-up.

That eating theme seemed to tie in nicely with these images, which show the lovely Katie from Men Are Slaves chowing down on her submissive. He’s covered in bite marks, so clearly he’s a tasty treat.

I found these images on the rather excellent Femdom Times.

Sparkle free zone

My image search tells me that the first shot below (found on Mujeres Dominantes) is from a show called the The Vampire Diaries. I’ve never seen it, but I like the blood, knife and rather impractical manacles.

As an adolescent I loved vampire movies, particularly those from Hammer Films. They always had such a great blend of violence, control and sensuality. Dracula was an entertaining character, but my favorite moments came after he’d turned his first voluptuous and skimpily dressed victim to the dark side. While her family looked on in horror, she’d start seducing, biting and generally behaving like a outrageous hussy with anyone in cleavage range. I loved those sequences, and always hated it when some bible thumping puritan turned up and stuck a stake in her.

I was involved in a scene recently where, after tying me up, the dominant carefully bent back my head and then bit me hard on neck and shoulder. It was a great moment and gave me happy flashbacks to sitting in a dark bedroom watching the late great Ingrid Pitt snack on her latest victim.

The complexity of corporal

I have a complex relationship with corporal style punishment. Before I got physically involved in BDSM it was one of the primary things I fantasized about, probably secondly only to bondage in my internal kinky hit parade. It was the focus of my very first play session, and I’d still describe it as a favorite activity. Yet, when I come to look back at the type of play I’ve done over the past couple of years, it has not been a frequently occurring theme. Things like CBT, breathplay, piercing and bondage have all been more popular picks. I’m not entirely sure why that is.

I do know that I’m typically more nervous before a corporal scene than other type of scene. There’s something a little more wild and uncontrolled about corporal play. Where I can relax and space out on something like CBT, a whipping or a caning feels more like a challenge. They’re a duet where I have a real role to play. There’s also a very different energy around it. Where some scenes can feel intimate, with a closed shared sense of energy, a corporal scene is far more cathartic. There’s a distance between myself and the dominant, with a creation and outward expression of energy.

I suspect that last factor is at least part of why I’ve done them less frequently in the last couple of years. I’ve felt more in need of close scenes, involving personal connection with the dominant, rather than powerful moments of catharsis. Although that might be changing. After last weeks beating I’m now feeling really antsy for another. Unfortunately both Lydia and I will be traveling over the next few weeks, so for the moment it looks like I’ll have to content myself with hot pictures such as this one.

This is from the Latin Beauties in High Heels site. I originally found it on the SM Images (aka fun fantasies) tumblr.