Samir Abady’s Kink Series

The title of this BuzzFeed article is somewhat silly – 18 Kinky Pictures From The Gritty Underworld Of BDSM – but the photographs and the writing with them is both interesting and revealing. It’s only a ‘gritty underworld’ if your idea of BDSM consists of perfect models posing in polished fetish gear on a studio set. What these photographs show is how some kinky people explore BDSM in the real world. Ropes get knots in them, bodies aren’t perfect and you don’t need a dungeon space to get creatively kinky.

I particularly liked the story of Josh and Mistress Blunt. As a fan of mummification and breathplay myself, I can understand a little of the meditative effect it can have. The shots of them pre-session and in session (like the one below) are great.

The photographer is Samir Abady and you can the full series of 19 images in his set entitled ‘Kink’.

Two Expressions

WordPress tells me that this is the 3rd time I’ve used this particular post title. I guess I should apologize for my lack of imagination when it comes to titles, but given what I typically look for in a kinky image, I’m actually surprised I haven’t used it more often. A compelling expression will always capture my eye over a hot body or fancy fetish gear. And two expressions, something giving a sense of connection, can turn an image from something posed into something real. Or, if not truly real, at least a far better facsimile of it.

I love the two looks below because they remind me of my own scenes, particularly the ones I did with Lydia. Like this gentleman, I’d often have an expression that captured a mix of emotions. My thought process in similar situations would be – “I’m nervous about what she’s about to do…but this is also really hot…and the fact I think both those things is kind of funny…and she’s so amazing…I love it when she smiles at me…can I be nervous and brave and amused all at once? OUCH!”

Obviously I can never say what goes through a domme’s mind in these situations, but I always got the impression Lydia’s thought was – “You can look at me like that, and it might be kind of cute, but it’s really not going to help. WHACK!”

I’m afraid I don’t know the man in this shot, but I recognize the woman as Mona Rogers. This is from a shoot for Femdom Empire.

Oh, and for anyone interested, here and here are the two previous time I used the same post title.

Marks and a Smile

I like this image for his sexy marks, her lovely smile and that none fetish dress. It’s nice to see a caning scene with a cute outfit that’s not supposed to be a teacher or a governess role play. Sometimes a good caning can just be a good caning, no fancy scenario required. I’m less keen on the kitchen setting. I’m not sure naked dangling genitals and food prep areas should ever coincide.

This is of course Mistress Ella Kross.

Extremities

The contents of this article entitled ‘Your brain on BDSM‘ (and this 2015 one it links to) will be old news to a lot of my regular readers. It talks about endorphins and hormones and all the good stuff that hot kinky play can create in the brain. I’ve covered similar ground in the past (for example here), but what caught my eye this time was this section.

They inferred from the study that the changes in executive functioning were as a result of the brain redirecting blood flow from higher-order functions to lower-order functions.

I’m not sure what the blood flow in my brain does in a session, but I am sometimes aware of what it’s doing in the rest of my body. During really intense play, the kind that’ll leave marks for weeks, I’ll get tingling and coldness in my extremities. It feels like all the blood is getting pulled back from my limbs into my core. It’s a really weird sensation. Obviously numbness and tingling can happen when restraints are too tight, but I’ve had this happen with no bondage involved at all. It’s almost like my body is manning its defenses. It doesn’t know what the hell is going on, but it’s taking no chances. Get the blood to the critical organs and worry about those optional hands and feet things later.

This reaction isn’t related to what’s being hit, slapped or poked. It might be a CBT session, but the hands are the ones that lose the blood. It almost feels like the body going into shock, but in a fun sexy kind of way. Has anyone else experienced this? Or is my blood just really wussy?

Here’s Mistress Eleise doing the kind of damage that might cause anyone’s blood to run and hide. This is shot for Femme Fatale Films.

Better Than Life (or not)

I recently purchased a HTC Vive Virtual Reality system. It’s a technology I’ve always been interested in – I even worked on it back in the 90’s – so I was intrigued to try out the latest and greatest systems. There are lots of companies investing in this space, including Facebook, Sony and Google, but the Vive looks to be one of the more advanced options right now.

Obviously, for the purposes of writing this post, I had to try out some VR porn. My readers deserve a proper investigation into the topic I thought. It would have been almost be selfish of me not to look at it. My top piece of advice for anyone in a similar research mode would be to buy the Virtual Desktop application. It makes browsing and running movies in different VR formats a breeze. When you have to deal with clunky headsets, headphones and twisty cables, the last thing you want to be doing is pulling it all on and off while you try and figure out why the naked people aren’t showing up properly.

Based on the very limited number of movies I’ve tried so far, my impressions are mixed. It does undoubtedly give you a much greater sense of presence and of being ‘in the scene’ than a regular movie. Sometimes, with the performer close and talking directly to camera, it was almost uncomfortable, a sense that my personal space was being invaded. Taking the headset off can be quite disconcerting, the sense of being elsewhere is so strong, that coming back to reality is a jolt.

However, making it more real in one aspect also highlights how unreal it is in others. You can’t touch. You can’t feel. You can look around, but not move around. The actors can’t interact with you. In that sense, it was much more frustrating that regular pornography. Watching regular femdom movies will often make me wish I could do a scene with the domme involved, but I never want to actually be in the scene I’m watching. It wouldn’t make any sense to think that – it’s obviously a movie. VR scenes did create that kind of frustration. I wanted to feel the pain, the pinch and the pull. I wanted that cock getting whipped to really be mine. Instead it was like my body had been anesthetized. Ironically, the virtual reality material actually created a greater desire to go out and play with real people in actual reality.

I’ll follow-up with some more thoughts on this topic in a post tomorrow. In the meantime, here’s a shot of Maitresse Madeline and Mike Panic in a cuckold scene from the Kink new VR studios.

Oh, and 10 kinky bonus points (no redeemable value, offer not applicable in all States, participants must be over 18 years old) to anyone who can tell me where the reference in the title comes from. As a hint, it’s a comedy reference.

Wallet

As a final post (for the time being) on the sometimes complex interactions between professional dominants and their submissive clients, here’s a short article on Bella Bathory and her ‘Wallet’. It’s written by Bella’s partner Siouxsie Q, and tries to tease out exactly what their dynamic is.

He’s not quite a client, and he’s not quite a friend. He’s not quite an employee, and he’s not quite family. He’s a unique combination of all four, more akin to a squire or a butler than anything else.

This image is from Bella Bathory’s instagram feed. If you’re interesting in arranging a session then her website is here.

Dana Kane

In the early years of this blog there was a fair amount of discussion, in both posts, links and comments, about the validity and authenticity of professional domination. Some maintained that the financial aspect always made the D/s dynamic inauthentic. A few people even held that pro-dommes were a significant negative influence on kink and femdom and the community would be better off without them.

Over time that kind of discussion seems to have faded. Possibly I’ve convinced people that while the professional aspect certainly makes a difference, it’s not the defining characteristic or necessarily a negative one. Possibly everyone who argued otherwise has got fed up and gone elsewhere. Maybe I’m just more sure of myself and therefore less likely to take offense and pick an argument.

If I was still regularly engaging in that kind of debate, then I’d certainly want to highlight a post (from 2015) by professional disciplinary Dana Kane on her relationship with one of her playmates Paul. It’s entitled ‘Can I come to your funeral?‘ and, as the title suggests, it’s both a powerful and emotional one. It covers both the development of their relationship and what happens when Paul becomes ill. It’s tricky one to summarize beyond that, so I’m not going to even try. Just go read it. I think it does show what a caring person Ms Kane is, how important kinky relationships can be to people, and also how complex and conflicted they can potentially be.

This image is of Dana Kane spanking Michael Darling for the Dreams of Spanking site.

Twitter Tantrum

Amazingly, while I was posting yesterday about the kinky T-Mobile Ads, Verizon and T-Mobile were getting to a ridiculous twitter feud over them. It ended up getting covered in a whole bunch of places, for example here and here. Some people even got upset with Verizon’s line that “Unfortunately no one will hear your safe word if you’re on @Tmobile“. Personally I thought that was kind of funny. Not sure how you get offended by it.

There has been a lot of controversy in the US in recent years over rulings treating corporations as people. Perhaps those opposed to that have been going about it the wrong way. These corporations are acting like people – specifically petulant teenagers on social media. So they should be able to get involved in politics, but only with the allowance they earn from cutting the lawn and taking out our garbage. And if they don’t behave themselves, we’ll ground them and take away their twitter account.

I believe this is the model Elena Berkova enjoying some quality texting time.

Superb Owl

America had some kind of sporting event combined with a pop concert and a product fair on Sunday. Yes, it was once again time for the annual Superb Owl (as coined by Mr. Colbert).

I’m tempted to make a joke about the Falcons being big breathplay fans, given how much choking was involved, but that feels like it’d be a cheap shot. Instead I’ll focus on a couple of the more amusing advertisements. T-Mobile enlisted the excellent Kristen Schaal to spoof Fifty Shades of Grey with this initial ad and then this follow-up. I say it was a 50 SoG spoof, but frankly Kristen’s character seems way more into enjoying kink than any of the characters from that sad series.

Weirdly this isn’t the first time I’ve featured T-Mobile. A few years ago they had an ad with Carly Foulkes on a motorcycle that pushed mine and I’m sure a few other people’s buttons. Somebody in their marketing department clearly has a kinky streak.

I’ll leave you with a shot of a woman doing to a man what the Patriots just did to the Falcons.

I’m afraid I don’t know who shot this. I found it on the Femdom Times site.