Understated uniform

Apologies for the lack of posts this weekend. Once again I had plans for stuff to write and, once again, life got in the way. I hate it when that happens.

To start the new week, here’s a nicely composed example of a well worked theme – a dominant lady in a military uniform. This is Lady Stella of Studio Avalon. There are a million shots in this genre floating around, but I like this particular example because it’s quite understated. It’s not a crazy over the top uniform. The camera isn’t shooting from the worms eye viewpoint. And she’s standing on what appears to be a military parade ground. It looks like a great starting point for a serious and intense roleplay.

Lady Stella

A lick and a look

I’m not a huge fan of tumblrs that automatically treat oral sex as a D/s act. Sometimes sex is just sex, and there’s no reason to impose a dominant dynamic on it. Everyone enjoys having soft wet squidgy bits rubbed on their genitals.

That said, it is an act that often lends itself to the D/s fantasy. This image is a great case in point. Her look really makes the image work for me. It’s very knowing.

Ass Licking
I found this on the Loves to Lick tumblr.

So it has come to this…

Shameless attention whoring ahoy! I figure if Ferns can get away with it, why not me?

Rori is once again taking nominations for the best sex bloggers. Last year I was nominated and ended up on the list, as I blogged about at the time. Now obviously as a serious and dedicated sex blog blogger, I’m above such petty popularity contests. It matters to me not one whit should I be nominated or not. My only concern is to bring you, my dear readers, the best femdom based material I can. But it strikes me that getting nominated would encourage more readers to visit. And that would mean more readers to write witty and insightful comments. And that in turn would create a better quality blog for everyone. So I’m really doing it for all of you out there.

Anyone buying that unimpeachable logic, and wanting to help me help you, can do so by leaving a suitable nomination comment on Rori’s site. It’d make me, I mean you, as happy as a Deviant Kade being tied up by a Simone Kross.

Deviant Kade with Simone Kross

The image is originally from the CBT and Ballbusting site. I found it via the Happy BDSM tumblr.

Slavery. Not as fun as it sounds.

I was amused by this article about an enterprising woman trying to get farm chores done on the cheap.

Masochists who responded to an advert by an Austrian woman seeking “submissive, well-to-do” men found themselves forced to do farm chores such as stacking wood in the nude or cutting the grass while wearing fetish masks.

Instead of the punishment they were expecting, the men were put to work as labourers around their mistress’s farm in north-eastern Austria, near the town of St. Pölten.

Unsurprisingly it turned out that doing real manual labor wasn’t quite as fun as the outdoor fetish frolics they were expecting. I’m not sure what kind of punishment she advertised, but stacking wood in the nude and cutting grass in a leather gimp mask sounds pretty punishing to me.

What’s particularly strange is that she ended up being charged with “illegal prostitution”. Since prostitution is the selling of sexual services, and the lack of kinky sex fun was precisely their complaint, I’d be intrigued to know what tortuous logic led to that charge. If she’d turned up in leather boots and hit them occasional, would that have made it “legal prostitution” ?

I’ll finish with a picture that is probably more in line with what the men were hoping for. It still looks like hard work, but I’m sure the pony gear, fetish outfits and whipping would have made them a lot happier.

Buggy Racing at OWK

This buggy racing shot is from the Other World Kingdom.

Big things in small places

I thought I’d finish my trio of artwork posts with an image from Kami Tora. On the face of it, with that enormous pink dildo, this looks like a typically stylized and over the top bit of femdom artwork. I really like Kami Tora’s work, but exaggeration is part and parcel of his style. However, the funny thing is, there are probably a few guys out there for whom this would not be a completely crazy insertion. For example, check out this animated gif or this one. I’m constantly amazed what a lot of lube, years of practice and a kinky dedication to stuffing enormous objects up your butt can achieve.

Kami Tora strapon scene

Spanking confessions

There’s a recently published article on Salon about a spanking aficionado coming to terms with and confessing his kink. It’s written from the point of view of a male top and, apart from the inappropriate stock photograph at the top, it’s a good insight into the kind of self-analysis and relationship risks a lot of kinky people have to enter into.

Male submissives often complain, with some justification, about the cultural unacceptability of their kinks. This article is a good reminder that dominants of both genders have their own set of problems to face. Particularly those that enjoy potentially painful activities. Telling someone you like to be hurt in certain specific ways risks them thinking you’re weird. Telling someone you like to hurt people risks them thinking you’re both weird and dangerous, no matter how much you emphasize the consensual nature of the act. Just a quick glance at the article comments will confirm the reactions that this confession can provoke from non-kinky people.

Spanked with a hairbrush

This image is taken from the Endart site, which is no longer maintained. I found it on the Who’s Sorry Now (aka spanked 2 tears) tumblr.

Wrapped in rope

Here’s a fun image to start the week. I have several longer posts lined up, but having spent the evening slicing, dicing and simmering in the kitchen, didn’t get chance to finish any of them off. This is by the artist Barry960 who has featured in a previous post. It captures a nice chemistry between the two of them. She looks happy with all her intricate rope work and he looks as though it has turned out to be a bit more involved and restricting than he was expecting.

Bondage artwork by Barry960

 

A delicate slap to the penis

This post was supposed to be a thoughtful follow-up to yesterdays one on the topic of negotiation. Unfortunately I got sucked into watching an old Columbo movie and ran out of time. If there’s one thing I like more than blogging, it’s well, many things actually. Sex. Bondage. Pain. Wine. Food. Books. Art. Fast cars. So really, among the many things I like more than blogging, one is classic Columbo movies. And that’s where my time went tonight.

I’ll therefore settle for a simple post with an interesting image. I love their expressions. I love the slapping action. But what’s with his blue shirt and her pink boots? It’s good that they’re not in stereotypical fetishwear, but is this the best alternative they could come up with?

Men in pain

The image is originally from the Men in Pain site. I found it on the Femdom Times site.

Anything is contextual

One great way to infuriate a dominant is to claim you’ll do anything. It’s like a red rag to a bull. The typical response is either to reach for an extreme form of play (‘go fetch me my branding iron’) or to propose a very un-fun type of play (‘go clean my car while I watch TV in sweatpants’). The idea being to demonstrate that the submissive better be careful what options he or she open up. Mistress Matisse wrote a column some years ago that covered the topic from the dominant point of view pretty well.

I definitely understand that viewpoint when playing with someone new. In that case communication to set expectations is vital. In past posts I’ve termed the failure to do so Meat Loaf syndrome – ‘I’ll do anything for you….but not that‘. However, I do think it’s a viewpoint that sometimes gets pushed too far. BDSM negotiation isn’t divorced from the normal conventions of discussion. Being a dominant doesn’t give you a right to abandon common sense, and ‘anything’ is always contextual.

If a partner asks me where I want to eat tonight and I reply “Oh anywhere really, you pick,’ nobody would interpret that as carte blanche to do whatever they like. Dumpster diving behind Pizza Hut is out. As is booking tickets for a 6 hour flight to the New York restaurant scene. And if they know I’m horribly allergic to crab, my answer doesn’t mean I’m willing to swell up and die in the local crab shack. I don’t have to specify these things because any friend or partner with half a brain will understand my ‘anywhere’ response as being implicitly qualified.

The same thing goes to BDSM negotiation. Assuming we’re somewhat familiar with each other, then ‘anything’ means activities the same as or vaguely within touching distance of stuff we’ve tried or discussed before. And if there’s something new that a dominant would like to try, then the ‘anything’ response is a great cue to suggest it to me as an option. As a submissive I like to give my dominant choice and flexibility in a scene whenever possible. It seems odd to punish people for trying to do that by deliberately picking the worst possible interpretations of their responses.

Mistress Matisse

Having referenced an article from Mistress Matisse, that gives me the perfect excuse to feature an image of this rather fabulous lady. This is an old shot recently republished on her twitter feed, and captioned by her as “Behold me as a little baby dominatrix! Look how scowly and stern I was! Rar, fear me! (That didn’t last very long.)” Her professional site is viewable here.

Tongue in the right corner

It’s odd what will catch my eye about an image. Here’s a naked guy with a butt plug, and an attractive smiling lady inserting the said plug. There’s a lot to like about that. Yet the element of the picture that prompted me to post it was his tongue, stuck in the corner of his mouth. It’s clearly a natural reaction to his vulnerable position and the plug, rather than an attempt to look good for the photographer. That’s a very human response and it makes the image so much more appealing to my eyes. If only more pornographers could capture that human element in their images.

Plugged

I can’t track down the original source for this image. Which is very annoying. If anyone can help out then please leave a comment. I found it via the Femdom Style Counsel tumblr.